That Wedding

"Da

"Definitely, yes. Honestly, I can't imagine my life without her. But it's still hard."

"Uh, speaking of hard. Is it bad that Phillip's gone from being my bff and wanting to sit around and talk to me all the time to wanting nothing but sex from me?"

Da

"So seriously, should I marry him?"

"Yeah, I think you should. You have to know he's crazy about you."

"Maybe, but these counseling sessions are freaking me out, Da

"You and Phillip aren't going to fail. You're good together. He's always been good for you."

"I know that, but am I good for him?"

"That's exactly what I wa

"You'll be the best dad, Da

"Well, when you put it that way, true."

"I just realized something. You're confident about everything you do. I don't know anyone with more confidence than you. In fact, you being scared makes me feel more normal. Maybe being scared is normal."

"I think you're right. Get to sleep."

"Okay, you too."

I sneak back into bed. I'm so glad I got to talk to Da

Everything will be fine.

Phillip is laying in bed watching TV while I take a hot bubble bath. I'm not feeling great. Phillip made me go to the doctor today because the cold I've been fighting for a couple weeks had turned into a stupid sinus infection. He gave me some strong antibiotics, so I should be feeling better quickly. The holidays were a blur. We had an amazing first Christmas together, and we're on the countdown to the big day. I can't believe in a couple weeks we'll be married! I think I was just nervous before. I know Phillip is the one for me.

I'm sure of it.

How can I not be sure of it when he's so sweet to me? He got my prescription filled, brought me home chicken noodle soup, and watched a movie with me. I slept through most of the movie because I was laying with my head on his lap, and he was ru

I get out of the tub, lay down next to him, and fall immediately to sleep.

I'm on the phone with a friend, telling her that I'm marrying Phillip.

I'm not sure who exactly I'm talking to, but I'm telling her how excited I am.

How Phillip and I will be the perfect married couple.

How we're made for each other.

I gush on and on about how amazing Phillip is. How I'm sure he's the perfect man for me.

But as I'm gushing on about him, all of a sudden, I watch myself burst into flames.

I'm on the phone speaking, but yet, I'm burning. I'm like the burning bush.

Apparently God believes I've just spoken blasphemy, that I'm not right for Phillip.

I wake up to Phillip shaking me. "Princess, wake up. You're screaming."

I guess you tend to do that when you spontaneously burst into flames.

I'm shaken by the dream.

Was the dream just a sign from God that I shouldn't marry Phillip? Or is my mind messing with me?

Phillip kisses my forehead. "Are you okay?"

"Yeah, just a bad dream."

He rolls me into his arms. I lay my head on his chest and listen to his heartbeat. I think fleetingly before I fall back asleep that God must've been wrong.

Because I belong in this exact spot.

Forever.

"That was amazing," Phillip says. "I did damn good."

Phillip's usually pretty impressed with himself after sex. It'd make me laugh, if he wasn't completely right. Everything he does is like perfect. I've always joked that he knows what's best for me, but I was talking about in life, not in bed. In bed, he definitely knows exactly what to do to me, like at exactly the right time. And I'm not sure how he does it because I still haven't figured everything out about him.

I've been thinking about telling Phillip about how I've been kinda nervous about the whole death do you part thing. About the whole being together FOREVER thing.

I've always been able to talk to Phillip about how I feel, but now that the boy we're talking about is him, it's not as easy.

And as much as I keep trying to push it away or smother it, I can't help it, the burning bush dream is still on my mind. I can't figure out if it was a sign I shouldn't marry Phillip or just plain old cold feet. I read on a wedding website that getting cold feet is completely normal, so I'm trying to be calm about it.

"Phillip, do you ever get cold feet?"

"Are you scared about getting married?"

"Me? Oh, no," I lie. "I just wondered if you do. I read on some wedding website that it's completely normal. I mean, I don't wa

"Princess, no way I'm changing my mind."

"And you don't think we're settling, right?"

"What do you mean?"

"Like we couldn't get anyone else, so we're best friends getting married."

Phillip backs away like I slapped him. "Is that what you think?"

"No, not at all. Someone just said that, and I wanted to make sure you don't feel that way."

"Let me guess, Richie Rich?"

"Um, maybe. So you don't think we are?"

Phillip doesn't answer. Instead, he kisses my neck. "Do you like that?"

"Uh, yeah, but we're supposed to be talking."

He runs his hands down my sides and says, "How bout that?"

"Phillip, what does that have to do with cold feet or settling?"

Phillip moves super fast. Before I know it, he's sitting on top of me and has my hands pi

I had just put on a T-shirt. He strips it off with one strong hand and pins my arms down against the bed again.

God, I love how strong he is.

"What are you doing?" I say breathlessly.

"I think I need to prove to you that you're not settling."

"How are you go

He kisses down my neck and murmurs into my ear. "Talking is overrated in this situation. I'm go

"So if I can resist you, we can call off the wedding?"

He nods his head then kisses the top of my outstretched arms, across my wrists, down my tender and slightly ticklish forearm. He's not even to my elbow, and I know I'd never be able to resist him with any conviction. Especially now that he's kissing my chest and my stomach. I'm tying to pretend to be disinterested, but truth is, I wanted him the second he rubbed his cheek against mine.