Betwixt

"Dad will find out... and then we're all dead."

Looking ready to pummel something, Dale reaches into his back pocket and pulls out his phone, with one hand resting on my forehead like a mother would, he lifts his other to check for reception. Glancing up at the phone in his hand, he swears and throws it on the ground. "There's no reception down here. You have to go up to the road and call for an ambulance."

"I ca-"

"Adam! You want to live with this for the rest of your life? She's dying! Now DO IT!"

Once again surprised by Dale's uncharacteristic outburst, Adam stumbles backwards. His eyes are like saucers, swirling with a mixture of fear and something else I can't quite figure out.

"MOVE." Dale's voice breaks.

Adam blinks slowly then looks at my dying body one last time before making his way up the hill.

"Do you think he'll do it?"

"I don't know," Dale sighs. "But I'm not leaving you. Go back into your body. Please, Nicky. Wake up."

"I'll try." I gaze at my lifeless form and close my eyes, willing the blackness to surround me so I can return.

"I'm fading," I whisper.

"Good, come back to me." He caresses my face while talking, looking at my eyes. I can sense how desperately he wants them to open. I squeeze my eyes shut again. Cold blood is ru

A slow blackness starts in the corner of my mind. "I think it's working. Everything's going black."

I open my eyes and spot Dale's hopeful expression. He's leaning over me, his face just an inch from mine.

"Come on," he whispers.

The blackness is closing in, blocking my vision of him. It feels different this time. Nothing hurts. If anything I feel like my body is filled with helium.

"Nicole?" Dale touches my face.

"I'm sorry," I whisper.

"Nicole."

I float away from him, the blackness consuming me as I'm lifted into the air. I can still hear his desperate pleas for me to wake up, but I can no longer reach him. Fear pulses through my system as I reach out into the blackness.

So this is death. A black nothingness. I was hoping to feel some sort of peace, some sort of end to my misery, instead the fear builds in my system until I feel like I'm drowning in it.

CHAPTER TWENTY-NINE

"Wait," I croak. "Wait, I'm not ready! I'm not done!"

My voice echoes off the surrounding walls, making me quiver.

"I'm not done." I scream again then curl into a ball as my fear-filled cries wash back over me.

Where am I? My body trembles with sobs as I rest my head on my knees. Is this it? Is this what I'll have to endure for the rest of eternity? A black nothingness?

I strain to hear Dale, but his voice has faded to obscurity.

I strain to see what's in front of me, but when I reach out my hand, I can't even see my fingers wiggling.

Forcing air into my lungs, I stand on shaky legs and try to move forward, cautiously taking small steps, unsure what I'll find.

There seems to be nothing around me. I don't know what I'm standing on, I can't feel anything.

"Hello? Please, can anybody hear me?" My voice sounds small and foreign.

I stumble backwards and fall to the ground. The shudders are returning, filling me with dread. There is no escaping this.

My eye catches a small glimmer high above me.

I focus on it as best I can. It looks like a star and seems to be falling towards me. My eyes are transfixed. As it gradually descends my new world gets brighter. I glance around me. I'm sitting in a bubble. As if some kid has blown one from soap suds and I'm caught inside. I spot Dale on the ground below me, he is frantically doing CPR on my limp body. I wince and turn away. His desperation is heartbreaking.

The intensity of light around me is growing stronger as the star continues to descend. I wonder if it's going to land on me as my eyes squint against the bright glare. I raise my arm and cower away from it. Landing just in front of me, it burns so bright it sears my retinas. I blink at the blotches impairing my vision.

The light starts to fade. As I win the blotch war, my vision clears and I am soon staring at the most beautiful thing I've ever seen.

Air rushes out of my lungs in a big gush.

"Jody?"

"Hey, sis."

She grins, that little impish one I always fell for.

"You look..." I reach out to touch her, but pull away last minute. This is too weird. Am I really looking at my sister? She looks exactly like she did when she was nine, except glowing and radiant. Her smile is filled with light and love, her eyes are glimmering. My hand drops to my side. "You look beautiful... the same as you were."

She shrugs. "I thought it would be easier for you to see me this way."

"What do you normally look like?"

Her dimples jump into place. "You'll see."

"So I go with you?" Hope spurts through my system followed swiftly by despair.

Jody's head tips to the side as she studies me.

I look away from her assessing gaze and cross my arms.

"We both know I don't deserve to, Jo."

"Why not?"

"You know why?!"

"Nicky, you need to understand this. It's not your fault."

"I shouldn't have locked you outside." I shake my head.

"I shouldn't have climbed that tree."

I glance at her with a frown.

"I should have come when you called me."

"I should have done the right thing and left you alone. There were a million other things I could have been doing that day, but I chose to a

The defensive walls inside my chest start to crumble as I fight to win the argument. "I'm your older sister. It was my responsibility to care for you."

"You never let me down, Nicky." Jody's voice is quiet and sure, leaving no room for objections. "I adored you every day of my life. You were the best older sister ever and I'm so sorry you've been suffering because of me."

"How can you be so forgiving?" Tears bubble on the edge of my lashes.

"That's easy." Her eyes light with a warm smile. "I love you."

I can do nothing but grin back as I swipe at my tears.

"I've missed you so much. You were such a ray of sunshine, remember how Mom used to say that all the time."

We both chuckle, but mine quickly dies away. "Home's not the same without you."

"I know and I miss you guys too."

"I wish I could turn back time and change what happened."

"Life doesn't work that way." Jody shrugs. "Besides, I'm happy, Nicky. It's so amazing up there."

She points in the direction she descended from.

"Better than anything anyone could possibly imagine." She shakes her head, looking blissfully happy.

It sounds amazing. I look up and feel the tug of curiosity.

Jody holds out her hand.

"You don't have to be afraid. I'll take care of you."

She giggles.

I smile at the sweet sound and reach for her hand. A shout from below grabs my attention. I glance down and watch Dale lean over my body, pumping my chest, forcing me heart to reignite.