Mything Persons

"He must mean the ones who came in earlier," Nun-

zio suggested helpfully. "You know. Boss, the two guys

with the broad."

MYTH-ING PERSONS

17

Aahz rolled his eyes in helpless frustration, and for

once I was inclined to agree with him.

"Umm, Nunzio," I said, staring at the ceiling, "why

don't you and Guido wait outside while we take care of

this?"

The two bodyguards trooped outside in silence,

though I noticed that Guido glared at his cousin with

such disdain that I suspected a stern dressing-down

would take place even before I could get to him myself.

The Mob is no more tolerant than magicians of staff

members who say more than they should in front of the

opposition.

"Now that we've established that we all know who

we're talking about and that they're here," Hay-ner

said, rubbing his hands together, "call them out and

we'll finish this once and for all."

"Not so fast," I interrupted. "First of all, neither of

us have laid eyes on those folks you're looking for,

because, second of all, they aren't here. They took it on

the lam out the back door before we could meet them."

"Somehow, I don't expect you to take our word for

it," Aahz added. "So feel free to search the place."

The Deveel's smile broadened, and I was conscious of

cold sweat breaking out on my brow.

"That won't be necessary. You see, whether I believe

you or not is of little consequence. Even if we searched,

I'm sure you would be better at hiding things than we

would be at finding them. All that really matters is that

we've established that they did come in here, and that

makes them .your responsibility."

I wasn't sure exactly what was going on here, but I

was sure that I was liking it less and less with each pass-

ing moment.

"Wait a minute, Hay-ner," I began. "What do you

mean 'We're responsible'? Responsible for what?"

18 Robert Asprin ;

"Why, for the fugitives, of course. Don't you remem- |

ber? When we agreed to let you use this place rent-free,

part of the deal was that if anyone of this household

broke any of the Bazaar rules, and either disappeared

off to another dimension or. otherwise refused to face ;

the charges, that you would personally take responsibil-

ity for their actions. It's a standard clause in any Bazaar

lease."

"Aahz," I said testily, "you cut the deal. Was there a

clause like that in it?" |

"There was," he admitted. "But I was thinking of

Tananda and Chumley at the time... and we'll stand

behind them anytime. Massha, too. It never occurred to

me that they'd try to claim that anyone who walked

through our door was a member of our household. I

don't see how they can hope to prove...."

"We don't have to prove that they're in your house-

hold," Hay-ner smiled. "You have to prove they

aren't." I

"That's crazy," Aahz exploded. "How can we |

prove...." I

"Can it, Aahz. We can't prove it. That's the point. |

All right, Hay-ner. You've got us. Now what exactly

have these characters done that we're responsible for

and what are our options? I thought one of the big sales

points of the Bazaar was that there weren't any rules

here."

"There aren't many," the Deveel said, "but the few

that do exist are strictly enforced. The specific rule your

friends broke involves fraud."

He quickly held up a hand to suppress my retort.

"I know what you're going to say. Fraud sounds like

a silly charge with all the hard bargaining that goes on

here at the Bazaar, but to us it's a serious matter. While

we pride ourselves in driving a hard bargain, once the

MYTH-ING PERSONS 19

deal is made you get the goods you were promised.

Sometimes there are specific details omitted in describ-

ing the goods, but anything actually said is true. That is

our reputation and the continued success of the Bazaar

depends on that reputation being scrupulously main-

tained. If a trader or merchant sells something claiming

it to be magical and it turns out to have no powers at all,

that's fraud ... and if the perpetrators are allowed to go

unpunished, it could mean the end of the Bazaar as we

know it."

"Actually," I said drily, "all I was going to do was

protest you billing them as our friends, but I'll let it go.

What you haven't mentioned is our options."

Hay-ner shrugged. "There are only three, really. You

can pay back the money they took falsely plus a twenty-

five percent fine, accept permanent banishment from

the Bazaar, or you can try to convince your fr—aahh, I

mean the fugitives to return to the Bazaar to settle mat-

ters themselves."

"I see... Very well. You've had your say. Now

please leave so my partner and I can discuss our position

on the matter."

Aahz took care of seeing them out while I plunged

into thought as to what we should do. When he re-

turned, we both sat in silence for the better part of an

hour before either of us spoke.

"Well," I said at last, "what do you think?"

"Banishment from the Bazaar is out!" Aahz snarled.

"Not only would it destroy our reputations, I'm not

about to get run out of the Bazaar and our home over

something as idiotic as this!"

"Agreed," I said grimly. "Even though it occurs to

me that Hay-ner is bluffing on that option. He wants us

to stick around the Bazaar as much as we want to stay.

He was the one who hired us in the first place, remem-

Robert Asprin

20

ber? I think he's expecting us to ante up and pay the

money. That way he gets back some of the squeeze he so

grudgingly parted with. Somehow the idea of giving in

to that kind of pressure really galls me."

Aahz nodded. "Me too."

There followed several more minutes of silence.

"Okay," Aahz said finally, "who's going to say it?"

"We're going to have to go after them." I sighed.

"Half right," Aahz corrected. "I'm going to have to

go after them. Partner or not, we're talking about hit-

ting a totally new dimension here, and it's too danger-

ous for someone at your level of magical skill."

"My level? How about you? You don't have any

powers at all. If it's too dangerous for me, what's sup-

posed to keep you safe?"

"Experience," he said loftily. "I'm used to doing

this, and you aren't. End of argument."

" 'End of argument' nothing! Just how do you pro-

pose to leave me behind if I don't agree?"

"That's easy," Aahz gri

the corner?"

I turned to look where he was pointing, and that's the

last thing I remembered for a long time.