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Chapter One:
This Ace Book contains the complete
text of the original trade edition.
It has been completely reset in a typeface
designed for easy reading and was printed
from new film.
MYTH-ING PERSONS
An Ace book / published by arrangement with
Starblaze Editions of the Do
PRINTING HISTORY
Do
Ace edition / November 1986
All rights reserved.
Copyright © 1984 by Robert L. Asprin.
Cover art by Walter Velez.
This book may not be reproduced in whole or in part,
by mimeograph or any other means, without permission.
For information address: The Do
5659 Virginia Beach Blvd., Norfolk, Virginia 23502.
ISBN: 0-441-55276-5
Ace Books are published by The Berkley Publishing Group,
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The name "ACE" and the "A" logo
are trademarks belonging to Charter Communications, Inc.
PRINTED IN THE UNITED STATES OF AMERICA
10 9 8 7
"Reputations are fine up to a point. After
that they become a pain!"
—D.JUAN
THERE is something sinfully satisfying about doing
something you know you aren't supposed to. This was
roughly my frame of mind as I approached a specific
nondescript tent at the Bazaar at Deva with my break-
fast under my arm ... guilty, but smug.
"Excuse me, young sahr!"
I turned to find an elderly Deveel waving desperately
at me as he hurried forward. Normally I would have
avoided the encounter, as Deveels are always selling
something and at the moment I wasn't buying, but since
I wasn't in a hurry I decided to hear what he had to say.
"I'm glad I caught you in time," he said, struggling
to catch his breath. "While I don't usually meddle, you
really don't want to go in there!"
"Why not? I was just...."
"Do you know who lives there?"
"Well, actually I thought...."
"That is the dwelling of the Great Skeeve!"
Robert Asprin
Something about this busybody irritated me. Maybe
it was the way he never let me finish a sentence. Any-
way, I decided to string him along for a while."
"The Great Skeeve?"
"You never heard of him?" The Deveel seemed gen-
uinely shocked. "He's probably the most powerful
magician at the Bazaar."
My opinion of the busybody soared to new heights,
but the game was too much fun to abandon.
"I've never had too much faith in magicians," I said
with studied casualness. "I've found for the most part
their powers are overrated."
The oldster rolled his eyes in exasperation.
"That may be true in most cases, but not when it
comes to the Great Skeeve! Did you know he consorts
with Demons and has a dragon for a familiar?"
I favored him with a worldly smile.
"So what? Deva is a crossroads of the dimensions.
Dimension travelers, or Demons as you call them, are
the norm around here. As a Deveel, your main liveli-
hood comes from dealing with Demons. As for the
dragon, there's a booth not eight rows from here that
sells dragons to anyone with the price.''
"No, no! You don't understand! Of course we all
deal with Demons when it comes to business. The dif-
ference is that this Skeeve is actually friends with them
... invites them into his home and lives with them. One
of his permanent house guests is a Pervert, and I don't
know of a single Deveel who would stoop that low.
What's more, I've heard it said that he has underworld
co
The game was growing tiresome. Any points the
Deveel had made with his tribute to the Great Skeeve
had been lost with interest when he started commenting
on Demons.
MYTH-ING PERSONS 3
"Well, thank you for your concern," I said, holding
out my hand for a handshake. "I promise you I'll re-
member everything you've said. What was your name
again?"
The Deveel grabbed my hand and began pumping it
vigorously.
"I am Aliman, and glad to be of assistance," he said
with an ingratiating smile. "If you really want to show
your gratitude, remember my name. Should you ever be
in need of a reputable magician, I have a nephew who's
just getting started in the business. I'm sure we could ar-
range some discount prices for you. Tell me, what is
your name so I can tell him who to watch for?"
I tightened my grip slightly and gave him my widest
smile. "Well, my friends call me Skeeve."
"I'll be sure to tell... SKEEVE?"
The Deveel's eyes widened, and his complexion faded
from red to a delicate pink.
"That's right," I said, retaining my grip on his hand.
"Oh, and for your information Demons from Perv are
called Pervects, not Perverts... and he's not my house
guest, he's my partner."
The Deveel was struggling desperately now, trying to
free his hand.
"Now then, how many customers have you scared
away from my business with your tales about what a
fearsome person I am? "
The Deveel tore loose from my grip and vanished into
the crowds, sounding an incoherent scream of terror as
he went. In short, Aliman left. Right?
I watched him go with a certain amount of mischie-
vous satisfaction. I wasn't really angry, mind you. We
literally had more money than we could use right now,
so I didn't begrudge him the customers. Still, I had
never really paused to consider how formidable our
4 Robert Asprin
operation must look from the outside. Viewing it now
through a stranger's eyes, I found myself more than a
little pleased. Considering the dubious nature of my
begi
over the last few years.
I had been serious when I told Aliman that I didn't
have much faith in magicians. My own reputation was
overrated to say the least, and if I was being billed as a
powerful magician, it made the others of my profession
more than a little suspect in my eyes. After several years
of seeing the inside of the magic business, I was starting
to wonder if any magician was really as good as people
thought.
I was so wrapped up in these thoughts as I entered our
humble tent that I had completely forgotten that I was
suppoised to be sneaking in. I was reminded almost im-
mediately.
The reminder came in the form of a huge man who
loomed up to block my path. "Boss," he said in a
squeaky little voice that was always surprising coming
from such a huge body, "you shouldn't ought to go out
alone like that. How many times we got to tell you...."
"It's all right, Nunzio," I said, trying to edge around
him. "I just ducked out to get some breakfast. Want a
bagel?"
Nunzio was both unconvinced and undaunted in his
scolding.
"How are we supposed to be your bodyguards if you
keep sneaking off alone every chance you get? Do you
know what Don Bruce would do to us if anything hap-
pened to you?"
"C'mon, Nunzio. You know how things are here at
the Bazaar. If the Deveels see me with a bodyguard, the
price of everything goes through the ceiling. Besides, I
MYTH-ING PERSONS 5
like being able to wander around on my own once in a
while."
"You can afford the higher prices. What you can't
afford is to set yourself up as a target for every bozo
who wants the rep of bagging the Great Skeeve."
I started to argue, but my conversation with Aliman
flashed across my mind. Nunzio was right. There were
two sides to having a reputation. If anyone believed the
rumors at the Bazaar and still meant me harm, they
would muster such firepower for the attempt that my
odds for survival would be nonexistent.
"Nunzio," I said slowly, "you may be right, but in
all honesty what could you and Guido do to stop a
magical attack on me?"
"Not a thing," he said calmly. "But they'd probably
try to knock off your bodyguards first, and that might
give you time to get away or hit them yourself before
they could muster a second attack."
He said it easily, like you or I might say "The sun
rises in the east," but it shook me. It had never really
occurred to me how expendable bodyguards are, or how
readily they accept the dangers of their profession.
"I'll try to remember that in the future," I said with a
certain degree of grave humility. "What's more, I think
I owe you and Guido an apology. Where is Guido,
anyway?"
"Upstairs arguing with His Nibbs," Nunzio gri
"As a matter of fact, I was looking for you to break it
up when I found you had snuck out again."
"Why didn't you say so in the first place?"
"What for? There's no rush. They'll be arguing until
you get there. I figured it was more important to con-
vince you to quit going out alone."
I groaned a little inside, but I had learned long ago the
6 Robert Asprin
futility of arguing priorities with Nunzio.
"Well, thanks again for the advice, but I'd better get
upstairs before those two kill each other."
With that I headed across the courtyard for the foun-
tain stairs to our offices....
Courtyard? Fountain stairs?
What happened to the humble tent I was walking into
a minute ago?
Weelll... I said I was a magician, didn't I? Our little
stall at the Bazaar is bigger on the inside than it is on the
outside. Lots bigger. I've lived in royal palaces that
weren't as big as our "humble tent." I can't take any
credit for this particular miracle, though, other than the