Blame it on the shame Part 2

I just don't know how in the world I'm going to say the words. The thought of even attempting to hurt him like this...causes me physical pain.

It's the only way. I remind myself.

I open my mouth—but Tyrone walks into his room and looks at me. "Are you done with my computer?"

My stomach rumbles and I'm reminded of exactly why I have to do what I'm about to do and play that video.

I have no choice, I have to go through with this.

And I have to push Ricardo away.

I meet Ricardo's gaze, my heart yearning for him the entire time. "Yeah, I'm done."

I walk out of the room with Ricardo on my heels. "I told you to get out," he barks as I hear the sound of the front door opening.

That's when I press the 'play' button on the remote and Alyssa pops up on the screen.

I hold the remote control and smirk at Jackson. "Jackson, so glad you came back. We were just getting to the good part."

I can see the rage cross over his face right before he lunges at me.

One of my hands instinctively flies over my stomach and I jump back.

I knew he would be mad...but not this mad.

I'm grateful that Tyrone and Ricardo are holding him back.

"I swear, man, we had no idea she was go

"Yeah. What the fuck is your deal, Lou-Lou?" Ricardo barks, before Alyssa's voice fills the room. "What do you want?"

Followed by some guy's voice. "Strip for me. Show me those nice titties of yours."

That's when Tyrone and Ricardo lose their grip on Jackson and he lunges forward again.

I'm about to scream that I'm pregnant and warn him that if he lays a finger on me I will butcher him in his sleep.

He gets in my face. "Shut it the fuck off now, or so help me God—I will tear your head right off your skank infested body," he shouts so loud the windows shake.

I can't stop myself from trembling and with jerky hands, I press a button on the remote.

That's when Momma comes charging at me. She reaches for my arm and begins dragging me toward the front door.

Oh, the damn irony—this is the most contact we've ever had.

"Don't mind me, boys. I'm just taking out the trash," she says before she throws me out the door. "Next time I won't be so kind—" She pauses. "What's that word you like to use again? Oh yeah...Puttana," she snarls before slamming the door in my face.

It's safe to say the ties between Ricardo and I are officially severed.

I rub my belly and close my eyes...except for the most important one.

I walk to my apartment and fight back tears all while telling myself that I did the right thing.

I'm protecting what I love the most. And even if it kills me, it will save them.