Incandescent

“She’s going to be okay. She woke up in the middle of the night.” She delivers the news I’ve been so desperate to hear.

Holly has had two surgeries in the last twenty-four hours. One to take out the bullet Zane put in her and the second to relieve a second bleed. She was rushed down last night for emergency surgery. If Sy and Jesse hadn’t come to save us when they did, I don’t think we would have survived.

The crack and thud of the bullet going through Zane and his body landing on me were the last things I remember. It took me a few minutes to come to with Jesse kneeling over me. I tried to get to Holly, but the pain in my chest was too unbearable. I felt like I was drawing in razor blades. I just remember Holly’s body lying in a pool of her own blood across from me, Sy working her chest trying to make it start again.

“Don’t you fucking die.” His words still ring in my ears as he yelled them repeatedly. The light and sounds of emergency services drowned out by those four words replaying over and over. “Don’t you fucking die.”

I know Nix doesn’t want me to blame myself with what happened, but I can't help but feel responsible. Zane was my crazy ex. I forced her out that night and it all comes back to me.

“You’re awake.” Nix’s voice coming from the door pulls me from my thoughts.

“Hey,” I say, watching as he nods to the shy nurse as she leaves us alone.

“I brought some people who wanted to see you,” Nix a

“Hey, sweetheart.” Jesse comes to me first, leaning down for a soft kiss to my cheek, wiping my tear with his thumb.

“Don’t cry,” he shakes his head.

I nod, trying so hard not to break down in front of them all. I know they have wanted to see me, but with the club on lockdown and all Nix’s attention on me, they’ve had to keep things ru

“Hey, Jesse," my voice croaks from the tears stuck in the back of my throat, causing Jesse to flinch.

He moves back, allowing Brooks to approach next, his hand coming to mine squeezing it lightly.

“Hey, doll, you doing okay?”

“I’m good. How’s your head?”

“It’s fine,” he dismisses my concern. “I’m so sorry,” he leans in and whispers.

“Don’t,” I say, knowing he will be feeling bad for what happened. He holds my stare, his eyes fighting with wanting to argue, but doesn’t.

Beau pulls up a chair next to me. He smiles slightly, his dark hair pulled back into a messy ponytail. “Still the prettiest thing I’ve seen,” he mutters, reaching out to grab my hand. Even though Beau and I started off on the wrong foot, I’ve come to see what a great guy he is. He’s loyal and fiercely protective of his club, but most of all, he’s Nix’s best friend. They have been through everything together.

“Thanks, Beau.” He nods, his eyes no longer holding that calculating stare he likes to give me. “Am I forgiven?” I ask hopeful. I don’t think I can handle him acting indifferent to me, when I’m becoming so close to the rest of the guys.

“Yeah, we’re cool, but if you pull that shit again, I will have to spank your ass.” I gulp down my gasp. He wouldn’t?

“Watch it, brother,” Nix rumbles from the end of the bed, as Beau starts laughing, I don’t know where to look. I feel the heat of my blush break out over my cheeks, the men all looking at me. Shit. I focus my eyes on Z, who stands awkwardly at the end of the bed next to his dad.

“Hey, Z,” I smile at him, reaching my hand out for his. He looks so unsure. His father nudges him forward, telling him he won't hurt me. He steps closer, slowly making his way to me. This little man has worked his way into my heart, and seeing him affected by what happened to me breaks me. He finally comes forward, close enough for me to touch. “It’s okay, Z. You can't hurt me,” I tell him. He takes my hand, coming to stand next to me. “How was the lake house?” I ask, trying to keep everything normal.

“It was good. Dad, Pops and I did some fishing on the lake.”

“Cool. You catch anything?” I continue asking questions, wanting him to be comfortable.

“No,” he shakes his head. “Just Pops did. Are you okay?” He softly questions, his eyes filled with concern. His big heart is more worried about me than talking about his time away.

This boy melts me.

“I am now that you’re here,” I tell him and watch as the smile spreads across his face. “I missed you this week,” I confess, hoping he gets that I feel the same way as he does.

His smile brightens more, filling me with light. “We missed you too. We were coming home early to see you. It didn't take too much to persuade Dad.” I laugh, the sound getting caught in my swollen throat. Beau reaches for my water, handing it to me to help soothe the burn. Z shows concern again. His smile now gone, worry lines currently replace it. All the guys’ faces are filled with anxiety, anger and even rage.

“Hey, I promise I’m okay,” I tell them all, looking into each of their eyes. They don’t look convinced, their tight nods telling me they won't push. My eyes co

“Hello, beautiful girl, hate seein’ you in this bed, but I’m glad I finally get to meet you. Between my son talking my ear off and Z telling me all about your baking, I was feeling a little left out.”

I smile at his attempt to make me feel comfortable. “Thank you for looking after them, Mr. Knight.”

“Call me Red, or Pops, but either way, please don’t call me Mr. Knight.” I laugh and nod my head. He pulls back to stand next to Sy against the wall.

“Hey, Sy,” I awkwardly wave. He nods, and then looks over at Nix, a silent request that has him moving everyone out of the room. Before I get to say goodbye to them all, the nurse comes back in, topping up my drip. Jesse notices the nurse first and his cheeky persona comes out to play.

“Can you escort me out, nurse?” He looks down at her chest, slowly moving his eyes to the rectangle nametag, “Nurse Belle?” He smiles his panty-dropping smile. I can see the shade of crimson that flashes down her face from the bed. The poor girl doesn’t know what’s hit her with the massive flirt. She shakes her head, letting him know she won’t before hightailing it out of there so fast, I wonder if she was even in here in the first place.

“Play nice, Jesse,” I warn, as he follows closely behind her. He waves me off, nowhere near ready to play nice.

Brooks and Beau go next, telling Nix they'll meet him later at the clubhouse. Z leans in and kisses my cheek, telling me to hurry up and come home. I promise I’ll try my hardest to get better and watch him leave with his Pops.

“How was your sleep?” Nix takes Beau’s vacated seat next to me, holding my hand.

“As good as one can with a broken rib,” I tell him. Looking across the room, I see Sy still standing to the side, quietly taking everything in.

“How are you doing, Sy?”

“Been better. Not as bad as you.” He winces like he just said the wrong thing.

“Thank you,” I tell him, knowing it’s nowhere near enough.

“I’m sorry that I didn’t get there sooner,” he says, a hard gaze coming over his face.

“You saved my life,” I choke out. “Saved Holly’s life.” At the mention of Holly’s name, he slumps back.

“I wasn’t fast enough.”

“Sy, you saved us. You need to understand that. This isn’t on you. Words won't ever be enough, Sy,” I tell him, watching as he nods, not needing to say anything. He pushes off the wall and walks to the bed.