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Phillip: We decided together that we would move to Kansas City, and we bought an amazing house. She's really excited about it.
Yes, SHE is. But shouldn't Phillip be saying, we're very excited about it?
Isn't he excited about it?
Have you discussed how many children you want, and when?
Me: Not really. I do want kids, but I don't want them for at least 3-5 years. And we'll have like 1, maybe 2 kids.
Phillip: We want them right away. And like 3, 4, maybe 5 kids.
WTF????!!!!!! Five kids!! RIGHT AWAY!?!?!?! Is he nuts????? We NEVER discussed that!
What do you do when you spend quality time together?
Me: We have sex. Oh, no, I can't write that. Cross that out. We jog together, watch football, hangout, stuff like that. I really do like hanging out with Phillip. We have fun together.
Phillip: We do everything together. We work out together, love sports, going out, hanging out with friends. She has always been my best friend.
What will you do if you have a disagreement?
Me: Honestly, I will probably pout until I get my way. And if that doesn't work, I will be mad and ignore him until he caves. It's worked well in the past.
Phillip: We'll openly discuss it. We really don't have many disagreements though. She does get mad at me sometimes, but I can usually talk her out of it.
He can talk me out of being mad? He's never talked me out of being mad! Who does he think he's marrying?
Do you ever hide from your true feelings? Do you ever use the silent treatment, lie, blame each other, or stop talking to each other?
Me: Yes, to pretty much all of the above.
Phillip: No, I'm very open with my feelings, at least Jadyn always knows what I'm feeling. And she tells me everything.
Oh, boy. We're in big trouble.
What went wrong with your longest relationship?
Me: He decided to marry someone else.
Phillip: She was jealous of my relationship with Jadyn.
Describe your courtship.
Me: We spent a week hanging out, got engaged on our first real date, and have been living together and dating, I guess, since. Actually, we've only had a few real dates. So maybe we didn't have a courtship? Or we had the longest courtship known to man.
Phillip: Basically, we've been best friends forever and have been in love with each other for a very long time. We just were afraid to make the jump from friends to a relationship. When we finally did, there seemed like no reason to wait. Our courtship has been amazing.
I swear, he's delirious. We didn't really have a courtship. No late night make out sessions in front of my house, no should I let him come in, no wondering if he's going to call again, no how far should I let him go without him thinking I'm a slut.
How did I miss out on our amazing courtship?
How will you make major decisions together?
Me: Talk about it, I would imagine. Kinda like we did about moving to KC.
Phillip: Talk about it together. Over wine.
In other words, get Jadyn tipsy, and she'll agree to just about any crazy idea.
Shit.
Is it easy for you to talk about your feelings?
Me: I used to tell Phillip everything. Now, I can't. I'm afraid he wouldn't like me anymore if he knew what I was thinking.
Phillip: We talk about everything.
Uh, wrong.
I can't read anymore. I wad the questio
I go to work and am surprisingly productive. I just finished up the rest of my preliminary drawings and am feeling really good about them. Going to the museum, letting off a little steam, must've been just what I needed.
I check my emails and see one from Amy. She wants to know what our first dance song will be.
Shit! Phillip and I don't have a song!!!
Apparently, when you don't have a courtship, you also don't have a song.
Sure, there are lots of songs that remind me of him. The song we all danced to like maniacs at his house whenever it came on the radio. The song that was playing in the car the night of my parents' accident. The song we danced to when he was my mercy date for winter formal. Songs from summers by Da
Then I remember that movie, The Wedding Pla
I picture the dream. My dad telling me that we're moving too fast. I think he might be right. Phillip and I are moving very fast.
We're talking warp speed.
If we were on a Starfleet spacecraft, we'd have gone into hyperspace by now.
We got engaged on our first date.
We bought a house.
We've only dated for four months.
AND, we don't have a song.
I don't need a wedding pla
We're doomed.
And I don't wa
I need Phillip, like I seriously need him, but maybe we need to slow down.
Maybe we should postpone the wedding.
No, calm down. It's just cold feet. Every bride feels this way. It said so on the website. It's normal to feel this way.
You love him.
It doesn't matter that your wedding guests almost got eaten by crocodiles. It doesn't matter that God turned you into a burning bush. It doesn't matter that you answered all the pastor's questions wrong. It doesn't matter that you solve conflicts with sex. It doesn't matter that you don't have a song.
You love Phillip. That's all that matters.
Everything will be fine.
It's a freaking song. It's not a barometer of your relationship.
I'll text Phillip, and we'll figure out a song. No big deal.
Me: Just realized we don't have a song. Like a first wedding dance appropriate song.
I'm just getting on the phone when Phillip sneaks up behind me and kisses my neck.
"Phillip, you're distracting me. I'm working hard here."
He chuckles. "You just sent me a text about wedding songs. I have a feeling your mind isn't completely on your work."
"Actually, it is. I'm ready to show you my designs. They're still rough, but they're all very different directions. I need to set up a meeting with your dad, but I thought maybe you could look at them, tell me what you think. Like if you think he'll like them, or if you have suggestions, or whatever."
"Sure, I'd love to see them."
I move off my chair and spread my big sketchbook out in front of him. Phillip flips through the pages. He goes back and flips through them again. He has an odd look on his face. I'm pretty sure he doesn't like any of them.
He finally says in an extremely shocked voice, "Damn, Princess, these are, like,......really good."