Four Summers

“And you felt guilty.”

Charlotte nods. “It was so hard, because then he started telling me how all he ever wanted was The Village and how it was his dream…but then he said he knew it wasn’t mine. He didn’t want to force it on me. If he deserved his dream, I deserved mine, right?”

That surprises the hell out of me. I never expected her dad to go there, but I don’t want to sound like an ass by saying it.

“Didn’t expect that one, did you?”

“You said it, not me.” I wink at her.

“He’d already talked to Alec’s parents and Nancy and they all had this plan worked out. He said it was happening regardless and that I deserve to live my life. They’re only doing summer and fall now. Nancy loves it there and loves to help, plus she helps take care of him. Add in Alec’s parents and…here I am. I’m still close enough to home that I can go back and help, but I’m free too.”

“You love The Village.” We both know she does. Getting out never meant she didn’t love it. “And Alec?” I don’t mean for my voice to be so tight when I ask about him.

A sad look takes over her face. “I want him to get out of there… I don’t know if he will yet. He needs it. All these years I thought I really knew him, Nate, but I didn’t. Not really. He—”

I groan and rub my hand over my face. “You’re killin’ me here.” It’s not something I like to admit, but I’ve always been jealous of him, their relationship and the times they had together.

“Not like that!” She sits up. “Shit, I didn’t mean for it to sound like that.”

“I have no right to care if it does.” I don’t like the words, but they need to be said.

“Maybe you don’t want to, but you do.”

“Char—”

She counters with, “Nathaniel.”

“You haven’t called me that in a while.”

“Maybe that will be what I call you when you piss me off.”

“What? What did I do?” I don’t know how the mood suddenly got so much lighter, but it did.

“You’re being a guy. I understand things like that so much better since I started hanging out with Danielle.”

That’s the first time I realize she really must not have talked to Alec for a while. That maybe she’d been almost as pissed at him as me.

“Let’s pretend we’re at The Village right now, okay?” Charlotte lies back down. “It’s like every other summer. Let’s just…talk.”

So we do. I tell her about Mom and the baby and she asks a lot of questions about Brandon. I manage to dodge the college question, but we catch up on everything else.

Its already almost evening time before I get her back to her hotel.

“You do realize I didn’t get to show you any of Central Park today, right?” I ask.

“It doesn’t matter.” She shakes her head.

An expression that says she still had a great day plays across her face, but I’m not ready to hear it. “I better go. I’ll pick you up tomorrow, okay?”

“Okay.”

As soon as I round the corner, my cell phone beeps. Pulling it out of my pocket I see a text from Charlotte.

What we did was better

Maybe I am ready to hear it. Not sure what I plan to say when I get there, I turn around back around, take the corner and see that she’s gone.

I don’t go after her. Don’t reply. Just head back to the train and go home.

“Nate! Wake up!” Brandon grabs me, jerking me out of sleep.

My room is pitch black, but then the lamp from my bedside table flips on, the light stinging my eyes. “What the hell, man?”

“It’s Mom. She’s bleeding. A lot. We’re taking her to the hospital.”

I’m already out of bed before the last word leaves his mouth. I pull on the same jeans I wore today, which were on the floor, get a t-shirt from my drawer and then I’m right behind my brother, snagging my cell as I head out of my room. My shoes are already by the door so I shove my socked feet into them.

“Where are they?” I ask. My voice shakes. My hands are shaking.

“They just left. Dad caught me when I was getting up to go to the bathroom and told me. I saw her nightgown, Nate. It’s…”

Brandon doesn’t continue and he doesn’t have to. It’s bad. I can see it with one look at him. “Just drive. Let’s go.”

We climb into Brandon’s truck and he backs out.

“We got into an argument tonight,” Brandon rushes out.

“Why?”

“I guess it wasn’t really a fight, but she was upset… I told her I’m not sure I want to play football anymore.”

That catches my attention. “You love football.”

“I never said I didn’t. But it’s a lot of pressure. You don’t get it. You loved baseball, but it was never the same. You’re also a brainiac and everyone has always known you’re more than just sports.”

“What are you talking about, Brandon? Mom and Dad have never been like that. Hell, Dad couldn’t care less about sports.”

“Who said I was talking about them?” he says quietly.

Every time I talk to Brandon lately, it’s like he has another surprise for me. Another secret I don’t know about him. Does he really think he’s not more than football?

“If you don’t wa

Brandon sighs. “Easier said than done, bro. And I don’t know for sure. I just…never mind. Mom is what matters right now."

“It’s not your fault.” I’m not sure why I say that. “The fight. If…”

I feel Brandon’s eyes on me. “Thanks, man.”

We don’t talk after that. I hold my phone in my hand the whole way to the hospital. While Brandon is parking I stop fighting the urge to text Charlotte.

Might not be there 2morrow. At the hospital with Mom. Bleeding.

It doesn’t matter that it’s two in the morning, Charlotte replies quickly.

What hospital? I’ll be right there.

A deep breath pushes out of my lungs. I should have known she’d give me exactly what I didn’t know I needed.

They’re in the room for an hour before Dad comes out. His face is pale as he sits down next to Brandon and I. “They’ve slowed the bleeding down, which is good. They also did an ultrasound to check on the baby; he’s doing okay for now. Still has a heartbeat and everything.”

“He?” Brandon asks. They’d decided they weren’t going to find out what they were having, but I guess this changed things.

At that, Dad smiles. “Three boys. How lucky are we?”

I lean back in the chair, studying Dad. It’s not like I never knew he loved us or I ever felt mistreated or anything. He has just always been…busy. Even when he would take summers off and we’d go to The Village, we have never been one of those families who eat together at night and plays games or whatever. We’ve all had our own lives, but looking at him now, I see how much we mean to him and how proud he is of us. It’s fu

“He’ll be okay, Dad. How could he not be? I mean, he’s cool enough to have me for a brother.”

Brandon punches me, but Dad laughs. “You guys are good kids. Your mother and I love you. Let’s keep Mom and your brother in your prayers, okay?”

The seriousness of the situation weighs heavily on us again. “She’s at twenty-four weeks now and that technically means the baby is viable.”

Viable? I don’t know why that word makes me nauseous. He says it like it’s a good thing, but, but it sounds so…cold.

“So they’d be okay if he comes early?” I ask.

Dad awkwardly adjusts his weight from one side to the other. “There are no promises, Nate. Obviously every day we can keep him in there safely is a good thing. He needs all the time he can to get strong. The odds of survival get better and better, but it’s still a tough road.”