Dizzy

Now his weight is on me, and his mouth is on mine. I should be feeling something more. Like, shouldn’t I want him the way he so obviously wants me?

A horn honks outside, which almost has to mean that Lora’s here.

James groans before rolling off me. “I’ll walk you down.”

He stands and offers me a hand, which I take. His arms go around me again as he pulls me into another kiss.

“James.” I try to pull away. “My sister.”

“Okay, okay…” He clasps my hand tightly as we walk down the stairs.

He stops at the bottom and leans into me. I really just want around him and to see my sister.

“Ziah.” He puts his hands on my face.

I finally relax and look at him, realizing he wants something else before he goes. “James.”

“I love you. I just… I want to try to find some time to be with you over break.” He gives me a soft kiss.

“We’ll see each other.” I shrug and start to move around him again.

“No. You know. Alone.”

Now I get that he wants a few hours where we can fool around. I’m just not sure if I want that right now. Not for that long. “I’ll call you. It’s always busy when Lora’s in town.”

He nods as I finally step around him and out the front door. I think I preferred James when he was more like my old-man boyfriend.

Lora steps out of the passenger’s side of a sleek, black Mercedes, which is a bit unexpected. I didn’t know she’d be arriving in some overpriced, over-glamorized car.  Some guy with almost black hair and striking blue eyes steps out of the driver’s side, and this is it. This is the guy. My stomach flips over, and I wish it weren’t too late to run inside and hide.

“Hey!” Lora half talks, half squeals and waves me down the stairs.

I’m frozen.

“Well, see you soon.” James kisses my cheek and runs his hand up the back of my shirt before moving toward the steps. I’m still sort of stu

Lora and I are almost twins. Her blonde is a shade lighter than mine, and she has Mom’s little button nose instead of Dad’s thin, straight one I got stuck with. But we’re built exactly the same and look one another in the eye. Before I can move down the steps, her and the guy and the first load of bags is on the porch.

It’s so weird that she’s here with a guy she thinks she’s going to marry. Before I can make any smart comments about how much crap he’s unloading for a simple Christmas Break visit, her arms are around me practically suffocating me. He’s back down the stairs for load number two.

James gives me a last wave and smile before climbing into his car. He’s been around long enough to know getting between me and my sister is futile.

“Nice to see you, too.” I try to laugh as she squeezes even tighter before letting me go.

“This is Derrick.” Her smile practically splits her face in half as she grabs his arm and pulls him a step closer to me. “Derrick, this is my little sister Ziah.”

Now is when we should shake. I reach my hand out, and wow does he have blue eyes. Party-boy blue.

“Great to meet you,” he says. It’s a good, firm shake—not too hard, not too soft.

“Yeah. You, too.”

Only I have no idea if it’s great or not. It’s starting to hit me. She wants this guy to be part of our family. Our family. Shouldn’t we all get a say in this? I’m not saying I want an arranged marriage, but I’m now seeing the benefits. It’s not that I don’t like him because I don’t know him. The whole marriage thing feels so irresponsible when they’re both working toward degrees.

“I think we’re all getting together for di

Lora gives me a look like she wants me to tell her right now how awesome he is, when really all I know about him is he drives a nice car, is strong enough to carry her bags, and is really cute.

“I guess I’ll see you then.” I tuck my hands in my back pockets, because my whole body feels sorta weird—like I don’t belong here. I’m not sure what else to do.

Lora walks him down to his car. When they kiss, they don’t come up for air for so long, it’s a little weird and makes me wish I’d stepped inside the house.

Finally he leaves, and Lora and I are on the porch with her mound of bags and her smile. It’s a toss-up as to which is bigger.

“Wow,” I say, because there really isn’t anything else to say.

“I know!” She digs into the huge bag she’s carried for the past year and sets a stack of bridal magazines between us. “This is going to be so much fun! We have like three hours before di

I’m stu

“So. This is what I want to do.” She opens a magazine to a picture of a bride and groom underneath this elaborate trellis thing that’s covered in those pale pink roses she likes so much. It has a chandelier in the middle. A chandelier.

Derrick must be loaded because there’s no way Mom and Dad would pay for something like that. The whole thing is a little much for me. Way too girly and dramatic.

“Uh…” My thoughts can’t completely come together. Too much fiancé with blue eyes and Alyssa being weird around James and James pushing us to be together and Lora home and this guy going to be part of our family... And her bags are still on the freaking porch.

“Anything we find in all these magazines that matches up with what’s in this picture, we mark. Cool?” Her finger rests on the original photo, and the stack of magazines suddenly looks like a mountain.

“Umm….” She wants me to look for pink flowers? Or what?

“Come on.” She grabs the stack, my arm, and hauls me into the house, leaving her bags outside. “I’ll do up your favorite muffins and hot chocolate. We’ll have so much fun!”

I’m already feeling like I’m caught in this Lora vortex of wedding and new guy and James and… I’m pretty sure I don’t want to be here.

***

I’m stuffed with muffins, and all the magazines are starting to look the same. I flip a page. “Lora! You gotta see this ridiculous article.” I laugh as I slide deeper into the couch.

She primping for the engagement di

“What is it?” she calls down.

“Please don’t yell in the house,” Dad asks.

I jump at the sound of his voice. My parents are so rarely home it throws me when they are. He’s reading in his oversized chair in the corner.

“Sorry.” I slump lower and glance at the article.

“Signs Your Boyfriend is Cheating.” And this in a bridal magazine? Hopefully soon-to-be brides are past this. Only as I read down, I start to get this weird, itchy feeling in my gut as I skim the short, paragraph stories.

My best friend and my boyfriend suddenly couldn’t be in the same room, and my boyfriend was acting different toward me. Turns out they hooked up at a party, and…

I’m choking. This sounds way too familiar. No. Not James and Alyssa. That would be… well, unbelievably horrible. I’m pretty sure they’re fighting about something. My fingers shake as I pull out my phone. Lora’s rummaging around behind me in the kitchen.

I start to call James, but now I’m worried about talking to him. Why would I worry about talking to James? Instead I go for non-committal. A text.

ME: TELL ME ABT U AND ALYSSA

That could reference their weird behavior without being specific. Put him in the position where he has to come up with some info.