Flat-Out Matt

“Cleaned up? Decontaminate? Gee, you’re full of euphemisms today, aren’t you?”

“Matt, seriously,” Julie said between clenched teeth and nodded toward the back seat.

“Don’t worry,” Celeste said with delight. “I’m following along just fine. I understand that neither of you will be attending the Greek Festival. And you two certainly have no business visiting any cathedrals.”

**********

Matt took the keys from Julie’s hand, tossed them across the room, and shut her apartment door with his foot. He moved one hand behind her neck and pulled her mouth against his. She whimpered slightly, overwhelmed at how much she felt for him. The few kisses they’d shared before had been driven by emotion. This was different. This time it was about heat and longing. More specifically, how completely she wanted him out of his geeky I’m Uncertain About Quantum Mechanics T-shirt.

He pulled away for a moment. “Dana’s not here, right?”

Julie shook her head. Dana was gone for the weekend, but she was having trouble finding the words to say so. To say anything.

She had just jumped out of an airplane.

And, as of a matter of a few hours ago, she and Matt were together. No more secrets between them, no confusion.

This day was a lot to take in. And she wanted more.

“Julie?” Matt asked.

Although she knew logically that her body was here in the apartment, part of her was still falling to earth, as if she were still in the jump. It had been just as Matt described it. A rush, a high, a drug. A degree of pounding terror, sure, but mostly a dreamlike, out-of-body, euphoric experience. One that she was still in. The straps holding them together for the tandem jump had been tighter than she had expected, but she’d liked that. Being so tied to Matt, becoming totally part of each other.

“Julie? You okay?” Matt tucked her hair behind her ears and looked at her with concern. She lifted her mouth to kiss him again, but he stopped her. “Are you… here?”

She put an arm around his waist and pulled him in. “I want to be with you,” she whispered.

“I want to be with you, too. But you need to be grounded. You’re still in the air, aren’t you?”

“So what?” She smiled. “I like it up here. And I still know what I want.”

“I need you to be here. With me.”

She kissed him again, hard, and he responded with equal intensity, feeding her lightheaded state and letting her continue to drift in her soaring, dissociated world of rushing air and white noise. It was everything and nothing at the same time: feeling too much, too little, trying to separate this world from the adrenaline-based world. Eventually his kisses slowed, softened, and his firm hold on her waist eased a bit. Matt was bringing her back down to reality, gently and respectfully. And now that’s where she wanted to be. She let clarity set back in.

 Julie took her mouth from his as she wrapped her arms around his neck, hugging him tightly. “I’m here.”

“In that case,” Matt stepped back and began unzipping her sweatshirt, “you have on way too many clothes.”

She put her hands over his. “Wait, I should go take a shower… first.” She could smell the leftover stench of fear still on her skin from the skydive.

And maybe from what she knew she was about to do.

Matt smiled. “In that case, you still have on too many clothes. And I’m pretty sure you’re going to need some help in that shower.”

“Because I’m incompetent?” she teased.

“Of course not. But showering can be complicated.” He dropped her sweatshirt to the floor. “It’s really not something you should try to take on alone after the day you’ve had.”

Julie kicked off her shoes. “That’s incredibly kind of you to offer your skilled help.” She took his hand and led him down the hall to the bathroom.

Wait a minute. Oh God. What the hell was she thinking? The bathroom had bright lights. And a toilet. How sexy is a toilet? Not very. Unless you’re into weird things. Which she wasn’t. In fact, as a person who had never been entirely naked with another person, she didn’t have the experience to be into anything. And what about the lights? Unless she’s got some crazy supermodel body, no girl wants to be seen under a horribly unflattering glare. But now what was she supposed to do? Stop in her tracks, shove Matt back into the hall, and slam the bathroom door so that she could shower in privacy? That was stupid. Being naked was stupid. Sex was probably stupid.

But then they were there, about to be surrounded by tile and pornographic lighting. This was a terrible idea.

Matt hit the switch on the wall, and in what Julie was quite sure could only be a sign from the universe that Matt was the one—her one—the light bulb crackled and flashed before going out. She smiled. Now there was just early evening light filtering through the window.

It was time to stop thinking.

She turned on the hot water in the shower, and then Matt was behind her, pulling her against him. Ever so slowly, he undid the top of her jeans. She looked down, watching as he pushed them lower until they fell to the floor. His hands moved to the hem of her shirt, and she raised her arms as he pulled the fabric over her head. He pushed her hair aside and brushed his lips over her neck. The way he was moving his tongue over her skin made her knees weak, and she leaned her head back into him.

The sound of his voice in her ear made her shiver. “I have been thinking about this—about you—for months.”

His hands moved to the curve of her waist, then up higher, gently over her breasts. For a moment, one hand slipped into her bra, tightening just enough so that she closed her eyes as a wave of anticipation took over. Steam from the ru

 “You were scared earlier today. In the plane, before we jumped.” He whispered in her ear and then kissed her shoulder. “What about right now?”

“Yes.”

“Don’t be.” His hands slid over her waist, across her stomach, until she was fully embraced in his arms. He held her close. “We’ll do what you want, when you want.”

She turned around to face him.

How you find love means nothing. It’s what you do with it when you see it that does. And when Julie looked at Matt, she unquestionably saw love. She would cart around hundreds of flat brothers and do the godforsaken Polar Plunge every year for the rest of her life if it meant that she would end up where she was right now.

“I want you, Matt. I want everything. You kept me safe today, you’ll keep me safe now.”

“Always. I promise, always.”

Together, they eased off his shirt and pants. She took him by the hand as she stepped, still half-dressed, back into the shower, until she was leaning against the wall. Matt moved in front of her and pulled the shower curtain closed. She reached up for him, pulling him in to her, needing him to kiss her, to hold her. And he did just that. His kisses were so complete and passionate, so perfect, and she finally understood what it meant to drown oneself in another person.

She worried before about being self-conscious, about the lighting, about not looking like some airbrushed supermodel. That seemed a distant and ridiculous memory now because, considering how his hands were stroking her body, he made worrying about that impossible. And, she realized, he wasn’t that kind of a guy. He didn’t want or need her to be or look like anyone else. And she didn’t need that from him. They were Matt and Julie, real people. That’s why she could be so comfortable, so trusting, with him—he wanted her for who she was, as she was.