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C ASSIDY
JACKIE AND I stood there in shock watching as the party turned into an all-out brawl. Girls were huddled in a group near the patio door, and while a few guys were standing with them, the rest seemed to all be in the fight or trying to pull guys off each other.
I looked up and saw Tyler slam someone back onto the hardwood floor and lean back to start hitting him, only to be flipped onto his back and get hit himself. Ethan grabbed the guy and pulled him back enough for Tyler to stand back up, but he stumbled into someone else before going back to the guy Ethan was still holding. I realized Gage was the one Ty had just run into and saw him holding Grant up and punching him in the face.
Why is this happening? My body was shaking watching the guys punching, kicking, and choking each other. Different days and nights with my mom and stepdad kept flashing through my mind and all I wanted to do was scream at them to stop, but I couldn’t find my voice. My legs were weak as my worst nightmare played out before my eyes and again I tried to yell at them, but my voice still wasn’t working. I let go of Jackie’s arm and rushed up to Gage before he could hit Grant again. I couldn’t deal with seeing the man I love hitting someone else for no apparent reason.
G AGE
“YOU SAY ANYTHING like that about her again, I will end you.” I brought my arm up one last time, but Grant’s eyes rolled to the back of his head and I felt someone try to grab at my arm. Without straightening my arm or my body I flung my elbow back into the person. Before I could realize that I’d hit a face instead of a torso, I’d turned around and had my arm cocked back, ready to throw another punch, and what I saw stopped my world.
The fighting around me, the yelling, the girls on the other side of the room shrieking, my heartbeat.
Everything. Stopped.
My eyes focused on my beautiful girl on the ground, Ethan’s hands under her arms. One eye was wide with what should have been shock but instead was outright fear, and the other was covered by her hand. Her mouth was slightly open, and as she took a staggering breath in and began to cover it with her other hand, my world unfroze and I dropped to my knees in front of her and tried to reach for her, but she flinched back into Ethan.
Cassidy flinched away from me.
It felt like I’d been shot in the chest with a shotgun.
“What the hell is wrong with you?!” Jackie screamed at me.
“Oh God, Cassidy!” I took a short, painful breath in. “Baby, are you all right? I’m—” Another painful breath. “I’m so sorry.”
I got to my feet and followed as Ethan lifted her up and walked quickly back to the bedroom with Jackie; Ty wasn’t far behind.
“Are you kidding me? You’re always going on about me hurting her and you hit her?!”
I felt like I was going to throw up. “I had no idea it was her, I didn’t even know she was in the room. God. Cassidy, are you okay? Please say something.” Ethan had already sat her on the bed so I got closer and gently touched her arm but she jerked away.
“Don’t touch her, you asshole!” Tyler pushed me back and went toe-to-toe with me.
“Stop fighting,” Cassidy said in a soft, robotic voice. I turned and my heart broke when I saw the right side of her face was in that familiar, lifeless mask. “Tyler.”
“Yeah, sweetheart?” He squatted next to her and grabbed her hand, the smile on his face showing how happy he was that she was going back to him, like always.
“I need you to leave, I need some time—”
“Cassi, I’ve always—”
“Not anymore, not after what you did to me.” Her voice lost some of its mechanical sound and got soft as a whisper when her eyes focused on his. “You closed the window, Ty.”
I could see that was the one thing that could hurt Tyler the most. Having Cassidy say those last words, confusing as they were, killed him. He stood there wide eyed for a moment before nodding and walking out of the room. As much as I hated him, I still felt somewhat bad for him. I couldn’t imagine how much that hurt, but from the way Cass glanced up at me I thought I was about to find out.
“Ethan, Jackie, can you guys give us a minute, please?”
Fuck.
As soon as the door shut behind them, I looked up to see her looking at me. Her hand had left her face and I saw it was a deep red. I had no doubt she was going to have a massive black eye in the morning. I swallowed back bile and took two steps toward her.
“Do not touch me, Gage Carson.”
Oh God. What the hell have I done?
“Cassidy.” My voice came out rough and quiet. “I swear I didn’t know you were even in the room, darlin’. I would never hurt you.”
“A part of me knows that, Gage.”
A part of her. A part of her. What the hell?!
“But I can’t—I don’t—you . . . you . . .” Her mask slipped and her head fell into her hands; a sob instantly tore through her body.
Fuck this. I took the last two steps toward her and sank to the bed, pulling her into my arms and onto my lap. Her body jerked like I’d shocked her, but I kept my hold tight and didn’t let go. No way was I letting go.
“Cassidy, I love you so much.” My voice came out tight and I kissed the top of her head. “God, baby, I’m so sorry.”
C ASSIDY
THIS WAS THE first time in many years that I’d cried after getting hit. But then again, this one was completely different from all the rest. This one was intended for someone else and was an act of self-defense; I knew that. Really, I did. But this one? This one was by far the worst hit I’d ever taken.
Walking out of the bedroom into the short hall had been like falling into a hellish nightmare. I hated any type of physical fighting. Hated it with every ounce of my being. And walking out to at least ten guys beating the crap out of each other had brought back flashbacks I’d worked so hard at erasing from my mind. Seeing Gage in the middle of it had taken it from hellish nightmare straight to hell. That was my personal hell, seeing Gage beating the crap out of Grant. I still didn’t know what started the fighting, or who started it, but that didn’t matter. For me, there is only one reason to fight someone, and it’s if they’re trying to take your life or the life of someone you love. But seeing as all those guys were close, I seriously doubted that was the case.
I shouldn’t have rushed in there, I should have yelled at Gage to stop. I’d been trying to yell, but I couldn’t make anything come out, and as for rushing in there . . . it was stupid, but I just wanted the fighting stopped. Instead, I’d taken an elbow to my eye. Considering what I’ve endured, it wasn’t that bad at all. I’d been so shocked by the way my head had snapped back so quickly, it took me a second to realize why I was falling backward, until I landed smack on my butt at the same time Ethan’s hands shot out to catch me. The pain in my eye and head finally registered as Gage turned around with a murderous glare in his eyes, his right arm cocked back, ready to strike again. And that was all I could see and feel anymore, even now.
Pain rushing through my head. Gage’s face twisted with rage and his fist aimed at me, ready to deliver another blow.
His arms tightened around me as he kissed the top of my head again. I brought my shaky hands up to his chest and pushed but he didn’t budge. I couldn’t be here in his arms, not when all I could see was that horrible image. I didn’t know if I’d ever be able to get that out of my mind. It was evident my words hurt him, but I didn’t want to lie to him. A part of me did know that Gage would never hurt me. Before tonight all of me had known that, and although I knew he didn’t do it on purpose and it was my fault, my past wasn’t letting me comprehend that.