Taking Chances

“I won't be, I only want you.”

I sat there a moment, concentrating on deep breaths in and out, “It's going to take a lot for me to believe you again Chase, but I'm willing to give you the opportunity to earn my trust again. We're going to have to start over as friends though.”

“I don't want to be your friend Harper!”

“It's that or nothing Chase.” I tried to keep my tone composed for the both of us.

“Baby I'm so sorry. I promise I wouldn't have done that to you, I don't remember anything from last night.”

“I told you, I'll give you a chance if you want it. But I need a few days before we can try to be friends. I really – I'm hurting Chase, I feel like you just confirmed every fear I've ever had of being in a relationship with you. And I'm still not sure how to begin to deal with this.”

He kissed me firmly, and cupped my face, “I will get to the bottom of whatever happened. I love you Harper, more than you could ever imagine.” He brought his mouth to mine again, and I let our lips move against each other for a few moments. I couldn’t help it, I didn’t know if or when we would have this again.

Chase's phone rang, snapping us out of the moment. He started to press ignore, but did a double take and answered, “WHAT THE HELL DID YOU DO TO ME?! DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA WHAT YOU'VE DONE?!” He stormed off into the kitchen, face bright red from anger, “No! You just ruined my life, do you understand that?! Don't fucking apologize to me! Harper is the only person you should be apologizing to, but understand that if you ever contact her, or me for that matter, again, I will make the rest of your life a living hell!” He ended the call and threw his iPhone against the wall, shattering the case and sending pieces towards me. “Oh God, Harper. I'm sorry!”

I shrunk into the chair when he came near me, he still looked like he was about to kill someone. When he saw my movements, his face fell, his anger quickly fading.

“I have to go, before I mess this up more.” He brushed his knuckles along my jaw, “I'm sorry for everything. I can't say that enough Harper, I'm so, so sorry. Please don't end us though, I will earn your trust again somehow, just don't do this.”

“Don't make this harder for either of us, you know how I feel. Let's give it a few days, and we'll see if we can start again as friends. No matter what happens to us Chase, I want you in his life.”

“I love you Princess.” With tears falling freely from his eyes, he kissed me quickly and walked out the door.

13

I didn't realize it was over and people were gathered around us until Bree pulled me up so I was now standing. We looked at each other, not knowing what to say, not knowing what to do. Mom was gripping both of our hands like a lifeline while Dad was standing behind her, holding her upper arms tight enough to support her. Some of their extended family came up and we all broke apart to accept hugs from them. I didn't know who most of them were, though they all knew me. There wasn't a dry eye in the church anyway, but when they looked down, or placed a hand on my stomach, new rounds of hysterics would burst out of them. It seemed too much to bear to everyone that I was holding the only piece left of him in this world. Chase.

It had been four days since the accident.

Four days since he told me he loved me, and I didn't say it back.

Four days since he died.

~~~

Twenty minutes after Chase left, Mom, Dad, Bree and I were sitting around the kitchen table talking through everything that had happened that day. Everyone was more shocked than I had been, but then again, they hadn't been there for every maddening moment of our relationship throughout this last school year. Bree's phone rang, and I knew it was Konrad by the way she answered it. I glanced at the clock, he should be back with my car soon from dropping Brandon off at Chase's house.

“No,” she whispered, face drained of color, eyes wide, “no you're lying. That's not fu

I tilted my head towards the phone and almost jumped out of my chair when she screamed bloody murder.

“NO!”

“Brea

Bree was now staring at the phone, horrified, “We have to go!” She screeched and ran out of the kitchen, “WE NEED TO GO!”

The three of us stayed at the table until we heard the front door slam shut and her car start up. Bree was screaming from the car for us to hurry, fat tears falling from her eyes. Robert opened the driver door and pulled her out, depositing her in the back seat which I slid into after.

“Oh my God, oh my God, oh my God! DAD GO!” She screamed, cradling her head and rocking back and forth slightly.

I rubbed my hand across her back, and after I shared a confused look with her parents, he finally backed out of the driveway.

“Brea

She rattled off an intersection through her sobs.

Mom turned around from the passenger seat and pulled Bree's hands from her face, “Brea

Bree's phone rang again and she pushed the talk button, but didn't say anything. I grabbed the phone and managed to get it out of her death grip, checking the screen first, I brought the phone to my ear and spoke, “Uh, Konrad? Wha –”

“He's not waking up! I can't get him out, there's blood everywhere and he's not waking up!”

“Who Konrad?”

“The ambulance is pulling up, you need to hurry!”

I heard him screaming for whom I'm guessing were the EMT's, and then the call ended. I realized then that we could hear sirens from the car as well and looked up to see we were only a few blocks away now. Bree was still harshly whispering unknown words.

“I think he might have wrecked my Expedition?” I guessed, still confused. Then it hit me. Brandon. He was supposed to be taking Brandon home. Oh God no. Please no. Don’t take him from me.

We rounded the corner and saw the ambulance, fire truck and three SDPD cars blocking off part of the street. Dad drove down the street enough so he could park, and not block the rest of traffic, and that's when I saw everything. Konrad being pulled away by two police officers, struggling to get back to Chase's truck that looked like it was fused to the front of an eighteen wheeler. A scream that rivaled Bree's ripped from my throat and I bolted out of the car before it had stopped. I ran past the officers holding Konrad and made it by another few before a fireman caught me and swung me away from the wreck.

“CHASE!” I screamed and wailed on the man to put me down, “CHASE!” Everything was so silent, yet so loud at the same time. I couldn't hear the sirens, I couldn't hear the shrieks and sobs from his family, I couldn't even hear my own voice anymore. I can't describe what filled my ears, only that it was deafening.

I continued to struggle to get to Chase, and somehow realized I was no longer being carried away. I must have fallen to the ground and now two people were holding me so I couldn't get back up. I saw Konrad crushing Bree to his chest a few feet away from me, both sobbing and falling to the street as well. I didn't know where Claire and Robert were, but I couldn't make myself look around for them. My eyes snapped back to the truck as a few men pulled Chase through the passenger side door. He was limp, his blond hair and body covered in blood. A surge of adrenaline shot through my body and the next thing I knew I had pulled away from the people holding me and was ru

“Chase! Wake up! Please wake up!” I grabbed his lifeless hand before a female EMT could begin to remove me from the area again. I screamed at her and reached back towards him, “Don't leave me like this! Wake up Chase, please!”