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CHAPTER EIGHTEEN
“SO...IF YOU’RE SOME sort of kid raised in the forest by raping bastards, how do you know what marriage is?” Josh asked, handing me a bottle of vibrant-colored liquid that claimed to provide a body’s requirements of electrolytes and minerals after a hard workout.
Josh caught me eyeing the label suspiciously. “It was the only thing in Gem’s fridge. She always has a stack of Gatorades for her late-night climbing sessions.”
I nodded in thanks and twisted the cap off, sniffing the sugary water. Supposed it couldn’t hurt—especially since the doctors said I was low in a bunch of vitamins.
He sat next to me at the outdoor table in Gem’s backyard. The afternoon sun granted a warm ambience, dappling the leaves above us.
I stayed tense, just in case his cease-fire was a ruse, but I did my best to relax too.
I was outside.
I was back in a place I could function.
This was my favorite spot at Gem’s house.
When she’d herded us all out here after a tearful reunion with her mother—and a hug that’d both put me on edge and also calmed me—I’d been able to take another proper breath since holding her in my arms.
She said yes.
Holy shit.
I hadn’t pla
Fuck.
Did I really...propose?
I didn’t get down on one knee. Wasn’t that what those characters did? I didn’t buy her fancy flowers or slay a dragon to make her choose me. Christ, I didn’t even have any money to get her a ring.
Jesus, what had I been thinking?
I know what I was thinking.
Gemma.
I wanted her for myself. Forever.
I wanted the world to know she was mine. To show everyone who might try to take me away again, who might try to claim me, that I was already claimed.
I’d chosen my new master.
I’d chosen her.
It was my choice.
My decision to fall and dedicate my entire life to hers.
It was a fucking honor to love her, and I never wanted to have that taken away from me—never wanted to feel the way I did this morning, worrying that I was one screw-up away from destroying everything good between us.
She’s mine.
And God, that knowledge settled the jagged parts of me I couldn’t control. Hopefully, my mind would behave now. She owned me, body and soul, so it made sense that she could help me control my triggers better.
After all, hearing her say yes had granted a strange kind of pride and a wonderful kind of peace.
We were more than just lovers, more than just friends.
We were family.
A true blue, legal and loving family.
Or at least...we will be once we get married.
“You’re doing that weird shit again,” Josh muttered, interrupting my crazy thoughts and dumping me back into the garden.
I blinked. “What weird shit?”
“Having a conversation with yourself.”
“I was talking out loud?”
“Nah.” He tipped the bottle to his lips, taking a drink. “But your eyes were darting around, and you were twitching a lot. It’s eerie.”
I flinched, looking down at my body, hating it for once again revealing my thoughts to a stranger. Gemma had read me easily. Now, her brother did too. Was it a by-product of living alone for so long? I rarely talked in that decade, but my thoughts were never quiet. I supposed those thoughts had become an animation of sorts, using muscles that were no longer used for conversation, puppeteering a body that had no companions.
“Hey, it’s all good.” Josh sighed. “I wasn’t saying it to make you self-conscious.”
I shrugged as if it hadn’t bothered me, trying to ignore how my gut panged at being told I was weird. How was I supposed to know what was normal? It wasn’t like I’d had society to guide me. Just how weird did I come across to him? How much would I have to change not to put people on edge or see me as different?
Wrapping my hand around my bottle, I dropped my stare. “I’ll try to do better. To not be so...weird.”
Josh smirked, saluting me with his bottle. “Guess you can’t be expected to be normal right off the bat.”
“Off the bat?” I scowled, not knowing that phrase.
“God, you really were sheltered, huh?”
“Sheltered from everyday stuff, yes. Sheltered from dark, painful shit? No.”
He winced, empathy filling his judging stare. “She’s not making that stuff up, is she?” His gaze shot to his sister. I followed his stare. Locking onto Gemma as she spoke to her mom beneath an evergreen tree at the bottom of the garden. The grass was overgrown, the outdoor table and chairs needed to be sanded and a new coat of varnish applied, and the flower beds were full of weeds, but I liked the wildness.
It reminded me of the valley.
Insects came and went.
Birds visited.
The sounds of society, hidden behind the moss-covered fence, were muted and easily forgotten.
He looked back at me, questions instead of judgment on his face. “You truly were trapped for that long?”
I stiffened but forced myself to nod. “Yes.”
“You literally only had animals to talk to?”
I half-smiled. “I didn’t befriend any of them if that’s what you think.”
“Why not?”
“What do you mean?”
“You would’ve been starved for company. You should’ve raised a wolf pup or something. Had a pet, you know? At least you would’ve had something to talk to instead of sitting in an empty house twitching with thoughts.”
I tried to hide another flinch.
Fuck, just how weird was I?
A heavy weight of melancholy filled me, slipping back to my past. “I...I was lost for a few years after my family left. Animals were food, not friends. I didn’t remember much apart from being hungry and trying to survive. I guess, by the time my memory came back, I was content with solitude.”
“Until my sister came along.”
I nodded with a faint grin. “Until your sister came along.”
“I still haven’t forgiven you for trapping her.” He pointed his bottle at me. “I might never forgive you for making us fear she was dead.”
I caught his narrowed stare. “I understand.”
He held my eyes for a long moment before nodding. “I see that you do. And that’s the only thing stopping me from telling Gemstone to get her head checked. I can’t believe she said yes to you.”
My heart fisted.
She said yes.
I looked back to where Gem laughed at something her mom said, the sun playing in her golden strands.
Fuck, she was beautiful.
Josh drank from his bottle of crazy pink water again. Wiping his mouth with the back of his hand, he muttered, “You go
I tore my gaze off Gemma, grateful she’d slipped into a pair of black leggings and a long-sleeved sweater and didn’t still wear her skimpy pajamas. Regardless of what she wore, my cock never stopped being aware of her.
Clearing my throat, I did my best to focus on Josh.
He waggled his eyebrows, waiting for me to reply. A whisper of panic licked through me. We sat close enough that I could see every hair on his arms and smell a faint whiff of body spray. His hands looked strong. He could hurt me if I continued dropping my guard.
The darkness inside me swirled alive.
It hissed that I wasn’t safe around a man.
That men were evil.
A threat.
A danger.
Not just to me but to Gemma.
My breathing turned heavy.
Sweat gathered on my lower back.
He’s her brother.
Chill the fuck out.
Unlocking my hand that’d squeezed my bottle of radioactive liquid until my knuckles turned white, I latched onto normalcy. I swallowed down my nonsense fear and asked, “What was your question again?”
He rolled his eyes. “I wanted to know how you even know what marriage is. I mean, you must, seeing as you spouted off a bunch of feelings and made my sister say yes.”
“I know what marriage is.”
Josh huffed. “Yes, but how? Did you have TV reception out there? Do you remember your parents before you were taken?”
I swallowed again. “I don’t remember much of anything before they took me.”
“Then how...?” He waved his bottle in the air. “You do know what marriage is, right? I mean, you just proposed to my damn sister. That shit is for life. I don’t like you, buddy, and I’m still on the fence that you have her best interests at heart even after hearing your story, but I can’t deny that she feels something for you, so I’m willing to be on my best behavior.” His teeth flashed in a tight smile. “Especially while my mom is here. Don’t want to stress her out any more than she already has been.”
I nodded. It’d been an unspoken agreement that the truth Gem and I had shared with Joshua would not be repeated to her mother. She’d received the condensed tale that I’d been hurt, Gem’s car hadn’t been usable, and there was no way to contact the outside world while I was recuperating.
I’d expected Gem’s mother to become guarded around me. To ask questions like Josh had. Instead, she’d just hugged me again, told me how glad she was that Gem wasn’t alone all that time, that I’d had help to recover, and welcomed me to the family.
She didn’t even know I’d proposed to her daughter the second before she’d walked in. She’d just blanket invited me into their world, and I wasn’t above accepting that invite because the deeper I fell into this new existence, the less inclined I was to leave it.
Yes, it was fucking terrifying.
Yes, my lungs still tickled with the aftermath of inhaling smoke as Fables burned to the ground.
And yes, I still had no idea who I wanted to be or how I’d fit into all of this, but one thing was for sure—I didn’t want to do any of this without Gem.
Therefore, she needed my ring on her finger and her last name to become mine.
“So...” Josh rolled his eyes. “Jeez, is it always this hard to get answers out of you?”
I looked at him. “I know most things that you do. Probably more if you don’t have time to read. I might have been hidden in a valley, away from conveniences and societies, but there were books.”
“Books?” His tone went high as if what I’d just said was stupid.
My hackles rose. “Yes, books. I read every single one of them in the library.”
“Library?”
“You going to repeat every word I say?”
He blinked. “So...you weren’t in a cave or something?”