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CHAPTER FORTY-SEVEN
“Did you eat enough?” Ash asked, striding into the antechamber and pulling a white linen shirt over his head.
“Yes.” This morning, he’d asked if I’d slept enough. The answer was the same, even though I could count on one hand how many hours of sleep I’d actually gotten. But I’d slept deeply, apparently having cried myself into exhaustion.
Ash eyed the array of dishes he’d arranged for me like he had when I said I’d gotten enough sleep. I’d eaten something from every plate and bowl. He looked worried when he stepped onto the raised platform. “You sure?”
“I ate two helpings of the sausage.” I patted my belly. “I’m stuffed.”
One side of his lips curled up, and he stopped at my side. He bent, kissed my cheek, and then stepped back. His gaze roamed over my face before fixing on my throat. Eather pierced his eyes as he opened his mouth.
“I know what you’re going to say,” I jumped in. “It’s the same thing you said this morning.”
He sat in the chair to my right. “That hasn’t changed, liessa. Those bruises should’ve healed by now. I want Kye to look you over.”
“I don’t know why the bruises haven’t completely faded, but I feel fine, Ash.” I took a drink of the citrus juice. “I promise.”
Ash didn’t say anything, just picked up the last strip of bacon he hadn’t eaten before he’d left to change.
“And we have too much to do today to waste time summoning a Healer,” I added.
He glanced over at me. “Making sure you’re healthy will never be a waste of time, Sera.”
“It is when I’m okay.” I sat back in the chair, resting my hands on the arms. “We need to decide what we’re doing. I’m pretty sure Kolis is still in stasis, but I doubt he will be for much longer. We need to…”
Wiping his fingers, he then tossed the napkin onto his plate. “Strike before he awakens?”
I nodded. “That’s what I should’ve agreed to when we first had this conversation.”
His eyes found mine. “What you decided the first time wasn’t wrong, Sera.”
My fingers pressed onto the wooden arms. “Can I ask you something? And will you give me your honest answer?”
“Always.”
I swallowed. “When you agreed to try to go the somewhat peaceful route first, was that what you really wanted? Or did you agree because it was what I suggested?”
“That’s a question with a complicated answer.” He rested his elbow on the arm of his chair. “I, too, wanted to avoid a full-scale war. Too many people would’ve died, both here and in the mortal realm. That’s why I agreed.”
“But?”
He was quiet for a moment. “But you know what I thought. That once Kolis felt truly threatened, he would strike out.” He drew his thumb over his chin. “I just prayed it would not be in the ma
Swallowing again, I nodded once more.
“So, yes, I did agree because it was the right route to go,” he continued. “I had my reservations, especially about the deals, but that is in the past. There’s no point in dwelling there. We don’t have time for that.”
I exhaled slowly. “Agreed.”
He took a drink of his coffee. “You said last night that you were now going to be yourself. You. Not who you thought you should be. I think I know the answer, but I want to hear it from you. How do you think we should proceed?”
I didn’t even have to think about it. “I think we should go straight to Dalos and take out anyone who stands in our way.”
“That’s what I thought.” He set his cup down. “But that will not work. As of right now, we still do not know who our allies are, and Kolis’s armies outnumber ours, even with you Ascending Penellaphe.”
I tensed. “You’ve gotten an update from Lotho?”
“Thierran gave me a brief update when he returned last night,” he said. “Nearly half the army has defected and fled to Dalos.”
I closed my eyes. Our numbers were closer to Kolis’s, but he still had more unless a Primal like Phanos joined us. “I wonder if Thierran settled all the scores he needed to,” I murmured.
Ash’s brows rose. “Do I even want to know?”
“Probably not.” The royal blue tunic I’d do
“Agreed.”
“We need to do that today.” I crossed my arms over my chest. “And we need to summon all the Primals, including Kyn and Veses. I want to make a statement.”
I didn’t even have to finish what I was saying. Ash knew, and a savage glint filled his eyes. He nodded and then asked, “Will you be able to handle that? There are rules when all the Primals are summoned into one’s home. They ca
“It won’t be easy. I…I may need your help with staying calm,” I admitted, feeling my cheeks burn.
He raised a brow. “You do realize I’m not the best person to rely on when it comes to that son of a bitch and keeping calm.”
“You will stop yourself. You’ve done it before,” I reminded him.
His eyes flashed with luminous eather. “That was before.”
Before he knew everything.
“We won’t mess this up. We will make sure we control ourselves,” he said after a moment. “Are we still pla
“Yes. I still believe in that.” I tucked a curl back. “More now than ever.”
He was quiet as he rolled up his sleeves. “Are we giving the Primals an ultimatum? Swear allegiance to us or die?”
I turned halfway to him. “I don’t like it,” I admitted, twisting the ends of my hair. “It sounds like something Kolis would do. With Phanos, I would like to give him the chance to stand down, but…”
“You want to do that because of what the ceeren did for you.”
I nodded. “I saw his pain at their loss, Ash. It was real.”
“I’m sure it was.” He exhaled heavily. “But isn’t Kolis capable of experiencing emotional pain?”
My fingers stilled.
“Veses? Kyn?” he continued. “That doesn’t change who they are at their cores, Sera. You know that.”
“I do.” I let go of my hair. “Thinking anything different would mean making another mistake. The same mistakes. We have to end this, and we need to do it in a ma
He inclined his head, catching what I wasn’t saying. That I could no longer hold back in an attempt to lessen the lives lost in Iliseeum. “That will solve our problem of acquiring enough Ancient bones. Either the Primals will give us what they have, or we will take it.”
That was what Attes had suggested. Take the bones from the Courts.
“You do know that we ca
“I know.” I tipped my head back against the cool wall. “I could Ascend a member of their Court just in case. We already have Aios if Maia remains loyal to Kolis. I could Ascend either Theon or Lailah to replace Kyn. We also have Saion and Rhahar.”
“Rhahar will not want to rule the Triton Isles,” he said.
My gaze flicked to him. “Then we will ask Saion.”
He nodded. “That leaves us with Veses’ Court.”
“Rhain won’t take her Court.” I pushed away from the wall. “And there truly isn’t a single god there we can trust?”
“I do not believe so.”
I made my way back to him, my chest heavy. “Does that mean we have to…?” I stopped searching for a less harsh word. I couldn’t pretty up the eradication of an entire Court. My chin lifted. “Does that mean we have to kill every god there?”
“The ones old enough to become an issue.” His jaw ticked. “Yes.”
Shaking my head, I glanced up at the ceiling. There had to be another way. Not trusting any of the gods to rule as a Primal didn’t mean they were incapable of changing. “There will be an impact on the mortal realm if we do that. With no Primal of Rites and Prosperity, we’d plunge all the kingdoms into ruin.”
“We would.”
I stopped in front of Ash, wanting to be close to him. There was no reason for me not to be. Ash knew nearly everything now, and he’d held me close as I slept. And as I got ready this morning, he hadn’t tried to hide his hungry stare when I undressed. Nothing had changed—well, that wasn’t entirely true. Everything had changed, but not in a bad way. It was almost like there was a new type of understanding between us. That didn’t mean I ever wanted to talk about what Kolis had done to me again, but I knew I could if I needed to. I nudged Ash’s leg with my knee.
He looked up at me and turned his body to the side. “You sure?”
I didn’t even have to say anything, and he knew. That was one of the many reasons I loved him so much. I offered him my hand.
He took it at once, folding his much larger hand around mine, and tugged me down so I sat in his lap. There was a moment when my mind wanted to go someplace else, but I nestled against Ash’s chest instead when he wrapped an arm around me.
“This helps you think better?” he asked.
“Mm-hmm,” I murmured, wiggling until I could rest my head under his chin. “It’s another of your hidden talents.”
He chuckled, burying a hand in my hair. “One even hidden to me.”
I smiled. “Do you remember during the last meeting when we talked about how the true Primal of Life could take on a Court?”
He kissed the top of my head. “Yes.”
“What if I take the Callasta Isles?” I said. “I know it’s never been done before, but that has to be better than what feels like genocide that leaves no one but orphans behind—children who will then grow up, likely hating us for slaughtering their parents without really giving them a chance to be able to change.”
“Giving them a chance can leave us vulnerable to rebellion and attacks,” he said, finding a curl.
I thought about that. “I’d rather deal with that than proceed as if it’s a foregone conclusion.”
“I would prefer that also,” he said, wrapping the strand around his finger. “As long as we know we ca
“Yeah, I know.” Sunlight crept over the interior walls. “But maybe there will be a god we can trust to rise at some point.”
“One can hope,” he said warily.
I trailed my fingers down his forearm, tracing the tendons and bone. “We need to remove as many of Kolis’s allies as we can before going after him. Once that’s done, we’ll have to…what did Attes say? Be the ones to act and not the ones to react?”
“Yes.” He straightened the curl out. “What are you thinking?”