Страница 12 из 66
“I’m sorry. I’m sorry again that I did this to you.” His scent shifted, and a new tang, almost like mandarins and honeysuckle, entered it. Some i
“What does it smell like when someone’s being truthful?”
He cocked his head. “It kinda smells like oranges, but it’s a bit different.”
Hence why I also thought of honeysuckle. My throat thickened. So Kaillen was sincere in his apology, and hearing him apologize again cracked something inside of me. Even though I wanted to stay mad at him and rage at him, that damned practical side of me knew that he never would have intentionally done this to me. I knew deep down that if he hadn’t been so consumed with fear and the mate bond in the throes of my death, that he never would have spelled his blood, and then all of this never would have happened.
“I know,” I finally replied. “I know you’re sorry.”
A long pause followed, his breathing and heartbeat the only sounds in the silence. “Does that mean you forgive me?” he finally asked.
I rolled my eyes. “I wouldn’t go that far.”
The first hint of a smile ghosted his lips.
I smirked. It was just too damned easy to fall back into our old bantering and sarcastic ways.
He shifted from where he sat. “Has the itching started?”
I nodded. “It feels like ants are crawling under my skin.”
“And do you sense her yet?”
“Sense who?”
“Your wolf.”
My eyes widened to saucers. “I’ll sense her?”
He nodded. “That part’s unavoidable. From tonight onward, she’ll be within you. You’ll always be able to sense her, feel her, and talk to her.”
“Gods, that sounds so crazy. Like I’ll have schizophrenia or something.”
“Unfortunately, medication won’t fix this.”
I raised an eyebrow. “Was that your attempt at a joke?”
“It was, and it was a pretty bad one, eh?”
I shook my head. “Your Canadian’s coming out.”
The golden light in his eyes flared, his lips curving. “It is, eh?”
I bit back a smile as some of the panic in me eased. Maybe, just maybe, this wouldn’t be super awful and painful. Perhaps Kaillen could distract me through the entire thing. “So you and your wolf talk, do you?”
“In a way. Our i
That twisting sensation started in my stomach again. So maybe this wouldn’t be easy. “But what if I don’t like her? Or she doesn’t like me?”
“That rarely happens.”
“But what if it does?”
“It most likely won’t. Our wolves are a part of us. They blend into our beings and are an entirely natural entity within us.”
“Maybe natural for you, ’cause you were born to be this, but natural for me? I don’t think it’s ever going to be.”
Some of the sparkle that had appeared in the hunter’s eyes dimmed again. “I know. I’m sorry.”
“You don’t have to keep apologizing.” I scratched my arm again, then my legs. Ugh. It was like I had the chicken pox without the rash. “So does that mean I’ll have to, I don’t know, think about her or ask her permission about things?” That thought left a very sour taste in my mouth. In fact, all of this did. I already had a witch-twin bond with my sister. Having a second bond, or entity inside me, would just feel crowded.
Kaillen reached into his pocket and pulled out a small vial of cream. “Use this. It’ll help the itching.”
As I began to slather it on my limbs—and oh my gods that felt so much better—he added, “The human side is the ultimate ruler, but your wolf can have strong opinions about things and try to rule you. You just need to make sure you exert your dominance.”
I stopped smearing whatever this magical lotion was. I’d pretty much used it all up anyway. “In what ways does one’s wolf try to rule?”
“The mate bond for one.” His eyes burned brighter, that gold hue flashing.
“Oh. Right.” ’Cause the dude had been totally controlled by his wolf when it came to me. My shoulders slumped as I was once again reminded that his attraction to me was due solely to his wolf. And thinking of that only reminded me that we hadn’t even broached that subject again.
The one time I’d brought it up and been honest with him about why I wasn’t jumping into a relationship with him, he’d disappeared for a run and then I’d been abducted.
I figured at this point, Kaillen had either forgotten about my rejection, or he was feeling guilty about putting me in that position so hadn’t brought it up again. I couldn’t blame him. I was in no hurry to start that convo again either.
I cradled my face in my hands. “I don’t want this. Any of this.”
A low grumble came from him. “They don’t rule us completely. My wolf didn’t make me—” He cut himself off.
I lifted my eyes to his. “Make you what?”
His eyes burned brighter, but then he glanced down when I began scratching my arms again. “Never mind. We don’t need to get into that now.”
I bit my lip as that cryptic statement swirled through my thoughts. Had he also been thinking about our conversation the morning I’d been abducted?
I was tempted to ask him, but then my stomach let out a huge growl and the sudden need for food, food, food completely overtook me.
“Oh my gods, I could eat a horse.” I clutched my stomach. “Or maybe I should eat a cow. Perhaps I should go that route since it’s more socially acceptable.”
“Not if you’re in India.”
“True, good thing we’re in America.”
He shook his head, amusement lighting his eyes before he rolled to his feet. “Come on. I’ll make you lunch.” He held out his hand, his expression guarded, almost as though he was waiting to see if I would take it.
I looked at his outstretched hand—the long fingers, the large palm—and warmth began tingling through me. The need to be with him, touch him, fuck him . . . my attraction to him hadn’t abated in the slightest.
It never had. Despite all that had transpired, my soul still wanted him, my body still craved him. Bottom line? I still wanted him as much as his wolf wanted me.
Oh fuck it. I grasped Kaillen’s hand and let him pull me up.