Страница 11 из 66
Chapter 3
After Kaillen’s portal dropped us into his living room, I let out a sigh of relief. I wasn’t happy to be shacked up with the hunter in his home again, but I was grateful for the privacy. Right now, I needed it. No way in hell was I going to shift into a wolf for the first time with an audience, and here, I didn’t have to hide. I could be me . . . whoever the new me was.
I gritted my teeth, then whispered the words to release my cloaking spell. My shoulders relaxed when its restrictive cage disappeared, but it didn’t stop the i
Kaillen’s nostrils flared, and he took a step closer to me, his wolf shining in his eyes. “We’ll find a way to keep you safe here, so you don’t need to go to an SF safe house.”
“Right. If you say so.” That was totally wishful thinking, and we both knew it.
His amber eyes blazed. “I’ll figure something out.”
I placed my hands on my hips. “Have you ever thought that it’s not for you to figure out? That maybe I need to?” His mouth opened, and he took a step forward, but I raised my hand. “I’m going to call Prish, if it’s safe for me to do that here?”
“The wards will stop anyone from tracing your calls.”
“In that case, just give me some space for a bit, okay?” I fled from the room as crimson fire rolled in his irises.
I flew up the stairs, irritation still biting me, but then my damned practical side kicked in. I knew that all of Kaillen’s betrayals had been instigated by the mate bond—the need to protect me and keep me safe. But that didn’t mean I was hunky-dory with what he’d chosen to do. Because of him, I was going to turn all furry tonight, which meant I was stuck here until that shit show ended.
If not for the damned full moon, I could have taken Commander Klebus up on her offer of an SF safe house—even though that didn’t particularly appeal to me either—but at least I’d be left alone there. ’Cause right now I needed to figure out what the hell I was going to do. Jakub was still hunting me, and I was so freakin’ tired of being prey.
“Fucking wolf mating bonds,” I said under my breath as I opened the door to my room. I reminded myself that I had the right to be pissed at Kaillen, so I was going to hold on to that fact whether he liked it or not.
That incessant itching under my skin began again when I closed my bedroom door. I plugged my phone in to charge, then paced around my room as I waited for it to have enough juice to turn on. The entire time, the itching grew and burned as if my skin were heating and rippling.
I shuddered.
This was beyond weird and uncomfortable. Before I knew it, I would probably have hairs sprouting through my skin and claws elongating from my nails.
Eww, eww, eww.
When my phone’s screen finally glowed to life, I punched my taps onto it so aggressively, I was worried I was going to crack the screen.
“Tala?” Prisha said in a surprised voice when she answered.
“Prish! Oh my gods, it’s so good to hear your voice.”
“Um, yeah, but what the hell? I thought you didn’t have your phone?”
“I do now, at least temporarily, but who knows how long that’ll be the case, since Jakub’s still hunting me, and I’ll have to leave here, and . . .” I carried on, rambling non-stop, but being the amazing friend that she was, Prisha let me fill her in, listening patiently as I vented, sobbed, raged, hiccupped, and generally acted like a complete mess. I told her everything, not holding anything back, and when I finally calmed down enough to take a deep breath, her stu
“Are you serious?” she said eventually. “You’re going to shift into a wolf tonight while you’re staying at the Fire Wolf’s home in Montana?”
“So he tells me.” I scratched at my chest again. It still felt as though ants were crawling under my skin.
“What the hell? How is that possible?”
“He thinks it’s because he combined his blood with spells when I drank it, and the result is me becoming a female werewolf who can actually shift. I’m officially a freak of nature.” I hung my head as Cameron’s words came back to bite me.
An abomination.
I shoved that memory down. No way was I letting that vile loser get into my head.
“So what’s going to happen? Can you feel anything now? Is your wolf, like, inside you or something?” Prisha asked, concern lacing her tone.
“Not that I know of, but I itch like a motherfucker, and I’ve eaten enough food today to feed a small country.”
She let out an aggrieved sound. “This is just so weird. I can’t even believe it.”
“I know, right? I keep hoping it’s all a bad dream.”
Prisha and I talked for another hour as I lamented and she listened, and when I finally turned our conversation around and asked what was going on in her life, she filled me in about her last couple of weeks.
Thankfully, nothing quite as epic had happened to her, but she was having issues again with one of the offices she ran for her family’s corporation, and she said Chicago was incredibly dull without me. But she was enjoying having our goldfish in her apartment. She’d picked them up for us when it became apparent we weren’t returning anytime soon.
“So Agent Orange and DJ Finster are still swimming happily?”
“They are,” she replied. “And I haven’t killed them, so I’m obviously an amazing goldfish-sitting aunt.”
I laughed, loving that we could joke around again. When I sobered, I said, “You know, it just hit me that we’ve never gone this long without speaking or seeing each other before.” Prish and I had been best friends since we were eight and had met at a supernatural community event. Of course, I’d been one of the poor kids who’d been dragged along by a social worker, and she’d been one of the volunteers helping the poor kids. But our co
Prisha sighed. “I know. I was thinking the same thing. I hate it. Chicago isn’t the same with you gone. I wish you could just come back here.”
“Me too. I’d take sixteen-hour work days every day at Practically Perfect instead of this.”
“Do you want me there with you?” she asked. “You know, when you shift or whatever?”
I glanced out the window. Afternoon had arrived, but the snow had stopped and it had warmed up enough that most of the flakes that had fallen this morning had melted. “I don’t think Kaillen would allow it, since that would involve disclosing his home’s location. He’s kinda secretive like that.”
“You could come to me and shift here at my home. It could be just you and me.”
I frowned as I tried to imagine going through whatever was going to happen to me tonight with a non-werewolf at my side while staying in a city as big as Chicago. Something told me that could end in disaster.
“I better stay here, just in case things don’t go well, and also ’cause Jakub’s still out there. I don’t need to be leading him to you.”
“I could take him.”
I laughed. “I know you could, but I would never do that to you.”
She let out a long breath. “Fine, only ’cause I know I can’t talk you out of it. But even though you and the Fire Wolf are in a difficult place at the moment, at least he can help or guide you, or whatever, when you shift tonight.”
“Hopefully.”
And I hoped he would, because I realized I would need it. Even though I’d dated Carlos—a werewolf—for years, had visited his pack on multiple occasions, and had generally considered myself somewhat educated in werewolf culture, I literally had no idea what to expect with a first shift. For one, they always happened when wolves were younger, around puberty. And since most wolves kept to their packs, it wasn’t like I’d gone to school with dozens of werewolves when I was in middle school. So I couldn’t even say I’d heard about the experience secondhand.
And two, shifting only happened to boys. Since it wasn’t something females ever experienced, I didn’t have any werewolf women friends I could call up to ask what they remembered of their first shift.
I was completely on my own here.
“How much longer will you have your phone?” Prisha asked.
“Probably not long. Klebus wants me to go to an SF safe house.”
“Seriously?”
“Yep, as long as Jakub’s still on the loose, I’m a sitting duck.” Anger burned through me again. I was so over all of this.
“Gods, this is all so incredibly unfair and sucks so much.”
“No shit,” I replied quietly. “Everything about this sucks.”
We talked for a few more minutes with promises to catch up again soon and talk as much as we could while I still had a phone.
After we hung up, for a moment I just sat there, staring forlornly at my mobile while feeling so incredibly isolated. I couldn’t remember ever feeling anything as bad as this.
A knock came on my door. I startled, not having heard the hunter approach on his silent footsteps.
“Yeah?” I called.
Kaillen cracked the door. “Mind if I come in?”
I shrugged. “It’s your house. I can’t really tell you where you can and can’t go.”
A muscle ticked in his jaw, and then a flicker of gold appeared in his amber eyes. “I’ll leave you alone if you want, but I wanted to discuss a few things with you, about what you can expect tonight.”
My throat bobbed, and I hastily nodded. “Okay, sure. Come in.”
He prowled into the room. Since his hair was clean, his face shaved, and he didn’t look quite so horrible, I figured he’d showered and had taken a catnap.
“You look a bit better,” I commented.
Instead of a sly jab or a preening swagger—a response he would have given when we’d first met—he merely sat down on the floor opposite me, his expression heavy and clouded in so many unsaid emotions that I hastily looked away.
I clutched my phone, then ran a finger over the smooth turquoise case.
The silence stretched around us, but then I became aware of his sounds—the steady lub-dub from Kaillen’s heart and his soft breathing. It seemed true silence was a thing of the past.
“How do you deal with this?” I brought my hands to my ears. “It’s all so much. The smells, the sounds. I’m okay with the sharper eyesight, but the other ones? No thanks. Klebus smelled like a damned corpse. It was nauseating.”
I thought that last comment would get a lip tug from him, or some kind of smile, but that aching pain was still etched on his face.