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I could really feel him.
Pulse racing, my eyes flew open, and my gaze collided with Ash’s. His body had stilled, too, but the bright-as-the-moon eather in his eyes whirled wildly. Neither of us moved or spoke for several moments as the embers in my chest started to hum.
“You feel…” Ash shook his head, his voice thick. His eyes were wide, the hollows under his cheeks starker as I felt him jerk inside me. “You feel as if you’re here.”
As did he.
I inhaled deeply, catching the faint scent of lilacs—stale lilacs. My heart turned over heavily, and fear coursed through me. Was I waking up? My already-pounding heart sped up. No, I wasn’t ready for that. I would never be.
“Love me,” I ordered—begged, really. “Love me.”
“Always,” he rasped.
Tears dampened my lashes. I squeezed my eyes shut against them, not wanting to feel the hopelessness they evoked. I didn’t want a sorrow-filled experience in my dreams.
I wanted to burn.
Ash’s head dipped, his mouth closing over the tip of a breast. He drew my nipple into his hot mouth. I gasped as a new wave of pleasure rolled through me. His hips began to move, and my gasp quickly turned to a moan.
He lifted his head, nuzzling my neck under my ear. “You’re so beautiful. Damn it, Sera, you’re so fucking beautiful.”
A shaky breath left me. I couldn’t feel more beautiful than I did right then.
“Tell me,” he murmured against the skin of my throat. “Tell me you love me, and I’ll show you my gratitude. I swear to you.”
“I love you,” I guided his head up, his eyes meeting mine. “I love you so much, Ash.”
Another tremor ran through him. He said something too low and quick for me to understand, but he did exactly as he swore he would.
The plunges and retreats picked up speed, moving faster and going deeper. We were all teeth and tangled limbs, greedy and desperate. We moved together, his hips thrusting down and mine surging to his. Pleasure spiked, making me dizzy and breathless in a way that conjured no fear, only want and need.
The muscles of his arms flexed, then he grasped my hip, lifting me until my ass was off the ground. I clasped the back of his neck, wrapping my legs around his waist. Gods, the angle…
Hot, tight shudders racked my body as his moved in a furious rhythm. The release came fast and hard. I fractured, his name falling from my lips and whispering against his flesh. He followed with a shout, driving me into the ground, bolts of pleasure arcing, leaving both of us panting and breathless, our skin slick with a sheen of sweat—mine warm, and his…
Ash felt cold.
Like he did when he needed to feed. I didn’t know why my memories decided to capture him that way now, but my thoughts scattered at the sound of his throaty laugh.
“Fates.” Ash’s cheek dragged against mine when he turned his head. His kiss was featherlight and tender as he eased from me, shifting so he braced the bulk of his weight. “How can this be a dream?”
“I don’t know.” I sighed as his nose touched mine. That too had cooled. A moment passed, and I let out a shaky breath. “It feels…”
“Real.” Ash nipped my lower lip once more, and when I gasped, his curled upward. “That felt real, didn’t it?”
I gri
His tongue flicked out, soothing the sting of his bite. “You feel real, Sera. So much so that I almost think we’re…”
Waiting for an answer, I searched his features. “What?”
His throat worked on a swallow, and he drew his fingers over the freckles on my chin. “I don’t know.” He smiled then, but it didn’t reach his stu
“You feel like that?” I laughed quietly. “This is such a strange dream—a good one, but strange.”
“I’ve never dreamt of anything better.”
“Neither have I,” I whispered.
Ash’s lips found mine, and my heart fluttered as if it had grown wings. The unrelenting need to hold on to him and cherish every moment spent in his presence surged through my entire being.
And I did.
I thought we lay there for a while, his forehead resting against mine, and our bodies still pressed tightly together. It felt like that—like the real passing of seconds and minutes.
But I’d never felt time in a dream before.
“Sera…” He spoke my name against my lips. “You have no idea how I wish this were real.”
“I do.” I found his mouth and kissed him. Even his lips were cold now.
He lifted his head, and his chest rose sharply against mine. “Sera.”
The way he said my name had my pulse spiking. My eyes fluttered open. His were wide.
“What happened?” His gaze darted wildly over my face. My concern rose. “Fucking Fates, did I hurt you?”
“What?” I frowned. “Of course, not.”
The eather pulsed brightly. “Your lip is split, and your jaw…it’s swollen. It wasn’t like that before.”
A shiver tiptoed down my spine. I managed to wiggle an arm between us and touch my lip. I winced at the flare of pain.
Ash moved quickly, catching my wrist. He pulled my hand away. “Don’t poke at it.” He drew my fingers to his mouth, dropping devastatingly gentle kisses on their tips.
Confusion swirled as I lifted my gaze to his. “It hurts.”
His skin thi
“But it stopped hurting the moment I started dreaming…” I trailed off.
“Are these injuries real?” Ash’s eyes had gone as flat as I’d seen Kolis’s turn before. He cursed. “Did he do this?” Frost dripped from his tone. “Has Kolis hurt you?”
“I don’t…” I slammed my eyes shut. “I don’t know why I would dream this.”
“This isn’t your…”
My brows pinched together. His skin had gotten even colder. The next breath I took carried that sweet-stale stench again as I opened my eyes.
“My fear,” he said, cursing.
“Your fear?”
“Yes.” Shadows stained the skin under his eyes where none had been before. Hollows had formed under his cheekbones. His lips were tinted blue. “Even in sleep, my fear for you consumes me.”
I stiffened at the sight of him. He was changing right before my eyes. His normally golden skin lost its color. Then the edges of Ash’s face blurred. My chest spasmed. His shoulders did the same.
“Liessa?” His head jerked at the sound of a…footstep?
My skin pimpled all over. A sudden pressure spread along the nape of my neck. My gaze flew to where my fingers were pressed tightly into the skin of his arms. “I can’t feel you.” My throat dried as I held on tighter. Or thought I did. I could barely feel his skin beneath mine anymore. “I can’t feel you any longer.”
“It’s okay,” Ash told me, his voice rough.
But it wasn’t okay. The tall, sweeping elms above us collapsed into smoke. The breeze vanished. Bone-deep desperation rose as I looked up at him.
“I don’t want to wake up,” I whispered, my heart cracking. I grabbed hold of him, but I couldn’t feel him. “Please, don’t let me wake up. I don’t want to leave you. Please.”
A noise came from Ash that sounded as if it had been dragged from the depths of his soul. “Sera—”
I jolted awake, my eyes flying open. I dragged in a ragged breath and tried to ease the pressure clamping down on my chest. My eyes burned with tears, causing the bars to blur just as Ash’s face had.
It had been a dream.
I knew that, but it had felt real. I could still feel Ash—his touch and kisses, the weight of him against my body. I could even feel that now, the fullness of him inside me and the dampness between my thighs. My hands still tingled with the feeling of his flesh against mine. It all felt so damn real. Still did.
But it couldn’t be.
Because there were no bright stars above me, only bars. And beneath me? The softness of the divan I’d fallen asleep on. There was no tranquil quiet—the distant, guttural howls of the dakkais could be heard.