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Watching, I forgot my disgrace. I was moved by the beauty and wildness of the dancing, and I saw, I think for the first time, that the beauty of it lay in this wildness. It was the dancing of outcast people, rebels. They obeyed nothing and no one. They made no attempt to match their movements one with another. They made no smiles, they did not seek the eyes of those watching. None gave a glance towards the high table where the King sat. And yet, on that night of moonlight and firelight when I had seen them first, Nesrin had danced before me and looked me in the face. And even now, as she turned this way and that, setting her feet with that grace and care I remembered, even now sometimes our eyes met.
Unexpectedly, in the midst of my trouble, I was attacked by self-reproach. How could I have expected these lawless wanderers to bow and count? When I thought of all the bowing and counting I had done in my life I could not feel satisfied with what it had brought me. I forgave the Anatolians in my heart for all the trouble they had caused me in the past and all that they were likely now to bring upon my head.
And in the particular case of Nesrin I extended this forgiveness to include the disturbance of my senses and the distraction of my thoughts that she had caused me from the first moment of seeing her.
The dulcimer fell silent now and the beating of the drum came in alternate rhythms. The dancers went back, back, arching over until their heads came close to the floor behind. Bodies arched thus, legs slightly spread, faces looking upward, they repeated that raising and shivering of the arms. It was an astonishing thing to see. I remembered now the words of the Greek trader, made poetic by his desire of coin. As if inviting the love of a god… I had eyes only for Nesrin, who was between the others, for the slightly parted knees, for the toenails reddened with he
There was dead silence in the hall as they came slowly upright again.
Then the King's voice sounded, a single shout of bravo, the supreme mark of royal approval. It released a great storm of applause that seemed to rebound from walls and ceiling. Coins began to clatter on the floor but not one of these people, who had bargained with me so stubbornly for two ducats at the i
The plaudits were continuing. The Anatolians were standing gravely there, a dew of sweat on the brows of the women. Some words passed among them and all looked at me as I stood against the wall. Then Ozgur gestured towards me, a movement strange to my eyes as often the gestures of these people were, bringing the palm of his hand towards his chest with fingers splayed, in a ma
In short, the Anatolian dancers were a great success, and this it was, I believe, that saved me from the King's displeasure at their failures of courtesy. I had done well in the past with some dwarf jugglers and an Armenian who could lift enormous weights and two Italians from Modena, a man and a woman, who could tell stories without words, only by movement and gesture and changes of face, so that one could understand everything. These had been some of my successes, but they all paled by comparison with this one. Besides, I had not been present at those times, not had this experience of being lifted up and borne along on a warm tide.
Before we could leave the hall, Fitzherbert came down to us – in person now. Not to order my immediate arrest for lese-majesty, but to inform me that by immediate command of the King this company should hold itself in readiness to appear again before him on the following evening.
Fitzherbert, who is haughty and cold in his usual ma
There was more to come. Orders had been sent through to the kitchen. We were escorted to the lodge that forms part of the gatehouse at the entrance to the i
We feasted together like lords, and afterwards with the wine still passing round, I emptied the purse on the table and shared the coin among them. I made the division in five parts, but it was the women who took charge of the money, making bundles with the scarves they had discarded in the dance.
"This is only the begi
I was exhilarated by the wine and by the success of the evening and my rescue from opprobrium, for which rescue I now felt deeply grateful to these people, altogether forgetting, in the exaltation of my spirits, that it was they who had caused the risk of it in the first place. I decided that it would be fitting to make a speech at this point and got to my feet. I said that this had been a very brilliant and unusual occasion with a good many first times in it, the first time there had been such great applause, the first time anyone had been engaged for the succeeding evening, the first time food and drink had been sent, at least in the years I had been purveyor of pleasures at the Diwan of Control. And from the King's own table! Above all, it was the first time that I had stayed to watch and been included in the applause. The idea of including me might have been in all their minds, but it was Nesrin who had come and taken my hand, so it could be said that it was her doing. I looked at her as I spoke. Her hair was tied back with a red ribbon and the upper part of her stomach, below where the bodice ended, was still uncovered – she had tied the scarf, with its knot of money, round her waist. Under that scarf, I thought, there would be the glittering pebble in her abdomen, temporarily eclipsed. Whatever I noted in her looks came always as a surprise to me, even when I had looked at her only shortly before, it was still surprising, even though familiar.