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"I remember."
"And when you decided to try to clear me of that murder rap over on Limbo, a dimension which just happens to be filled with vampires and werewolves, I'd say that was a problem, too."
"I don't see what ..."
"Now, in direct contrast, let's examine the current situation. As I understand it, you're in danger of getting married to the Queen, which, I believe, includes having free run of the kingdom's treasury. The other option is that you decide not to marry her, whereupon she abdicates to you ... leaving you again with a free hand on the treasury, only without the Queen." He showed me his impressive array of teeth. "I repeat, what problem?"
Not for the first time, it occurred to me that my partner had a tendency to appraise the pluses and minuses of any situation by the simple technique of reducing everything to monetary terms and scrutinizing the bottom line.
"The problem is," I said tersely, "that in order to get that access to the treasury, I have to get married or become king. Frankly, I'm not sure I'm wild about either option."
"Compared to what you've been through in the past to scrape together a few coins, it's not bad," Aahz shrugged. "Face it, Skeeve. Making a bundle usually involves something unpleasant. Nobody ... and I mean nobody ... is going to fork over hard cash for your having a good time."
Of course, those "few coins" we had scraped together over the past years added up to enough to make even a Pervish banker sit up and take notice, but I knew the futility of trying to convince Aahz that there was ever such a thing as enough money.
"Maybe I could just write about having dubious adventures instead of actually doing anything," I muttered. "That always sounded to me like a pretty cushy job to cash in on the good life."
"You think so? Well, let me educate you to the harsh realities of the universe, partner. It's one thing to practice a skill or a hobby when you feel like it, but whether it's writing, singing, or playing baseball, when you've got to do something whether you're up for it or not, it's work."
I could see this conversation was going nowhere. Aahz simply wasn't going to see my point of view, so I decided to play dirty. I switched to his point of view.
"Maybe I'd be more enthusiastic," I said, carefully, "if the kingdom's finances weren't at rock bottom. Doing something unpleasant to acquire a stack of debts doesn't strike me as all that great a deal."
Okay. It was hitting below the belt. But that just happens to be where Pervects such as Aahz are the most sensitive ... which is to say where they keep their wallets.
"You've got a point there," rny partner said thoughtfully, wavering for the first time in the conversation. "Still, you managed to finagle a whole month before you have to make a decision. I figure in that time we shouM be able to get a pretty good fix on what the real financial situation around here is ... end if it can be turned around."
"There's just one problerr with i:hat," I pointed out. "I know even less about money than I know about magik."
"Just off hand, I'd say you were doing pretty well in both departments."
I caught the tdge in my partner's voice, and realized that he was on the brink of taking my comment personally . . which is not surprising as he was the one who taught me nearly everything I know about magik and money.
"Oh, I'm okay when it conies to personal finances and contract negotiations ... more than okay, in fact ... and I have you to thank for that." I said hastily. "What we're looking at now, though, is high finance ... as in trying to manage the funds for a whole kingdom! I don't think that was covered in my lessons, or if it was, it went over my head."
"Okay. That's a valid concern," Aahz conceded. "Still, it's probably the same thing you've been doing for M.Y.T.H. Inc., but on a larger scale."
"That's fine, except Bu
"She is," Aahz exclaimed, clicking his fingers. "That's the other reason I was looking for you."
"Really? Where is she?"
"Waiting in your room. I wasn't sure what kind of sleeping arrangements you wanted set up."
One of the changes from my previous stay at the palace was that instead of sharing a room with Aahz, I had a room of my own. It's a tribute to how worried I was, however, that the implications of what he said went right over my head.
"Same as always," I said. "See if we can find a room for her that's at least in the same wing of the palace as ours, though."
"If you say so," Aahz shrugged. "Anyway, we'd better get going. She seemed real anxious to see you."
I only listened to this last with half an ear, as something else had momentarily caught my attention.
I had turned away from Aahz to give Gleep one last pat before we left, and for the barest fraction of a second saw something I had never noticed before. He was listening to us!
Now, as I noted earlier, I've always maintained that Gleep was bright, but as I turned, I had a fleeting impression of intelligence in his expression. To clarify, there is a difference between "bright" and "intelligent." "Bright," as I'd always applied it to my pet, means that he is alert and quick to learn. "Intelligent," on the other hand, goes beyond "monkey see, monkey do" tricks, all the way to "independent thought."
Gleep's expression as I turned was one of thoughtful concentration, if not calculation. Then he saw me looking at him and the look disappeared, to be replaced with his more familiar expression of eager friendliness.
For some reason, this gave me a turn. Perhaps it was because I found myself remembering reports from the team about their efforts to disrupt the kingdom in my absence. Specifically, I was recalling the claim that Gleep had nearly killed Tananda ... something I had dismissed at the time as being an accident that was being blown out of proportion in their effort to impress me with the difficulties of their assignment. Now, however, as I stared at my pet, I began to wonder if I should have paid closer attention to what they were saying. Then again, maybe it had just been the light playing tricks on me. Gleep certainly looked i
"Com'on, partner," Aahz repeated testily. "You can play with your dragon some other time. I still think we should try to sell that stupid beast off before he eats his way through our bankroll. He really doesn't add anything to our operation ... except food bills."
Because I was already watching, I caught it this time. For the briefest moment Gleep's eyes narrowed as he glanced at Aahz, and an almost u
"Gleep's a friend of mine now, Aahz," I said carefully, not taking my eyes off my pet. "fust like you and the rest of the crew are. I wouldn't want to lose any of you."
My dragon seemed to take no notice of my words, craning his neck to look around the stable. Now, however, it seemed to me his i
"If you say so," Aahz shrugged, heading for the door. "In the meantime, let's go see Bu
I hesitated a moment longer, then followed him out of the stables.