Garden of Sins

“You know the only thing that calms me down?” Dad asks, finally taking his eyes off the garage door.

“Something about this fucking situation calms you down?” I look up in disbelief.

My father finally pushes off the table, pulls back a chair, and sits down. “You will never be alone, no matter what happens,” he explains.

“That’s not enough,” I reply roughly, massaging my forehead. “I screwed up.” I should’ve controlled them more, paid more attention, given them less freedom.

“Do you believe me when I say that every parent in this world feels that way at times, no matter how right they may have done everything?” Dad sweeps some crumbs off the table and sighs.

“If something happens to them...” I start out, tormented, and imagine the worst scenarios. Carter shot on a corner, Caden trying to cover Carter, who takes a direct shot to the head. Caden and Carter arrested during an operation and pressed to the ground, maybe by us. Who knows? Horror, Emilia.

“I know,” he replies hoarsely and puts his big hand on my shoulder. “I wish I could tell you it will get better, but it won’t. From now on, it will only get worse and I’m here no matter what happens. I’ll always be here.”

“What am I going to do now?” I ask, so tired of all this.

Dad briefly squeezes my shoulder and then drops his hand again. “We’ll know what to do when the time comes.” But how far we will go, Emilia?

“Do you really want to take action against them when the going gets tough?” I ask myself anxiously at the thought of it.

He laughs drily. “Oh, Mason, I’ve already covered up and hidden so much, I merely want them to be a bit frightened. Sometimes it works wonders.”

As we stare at each other, something flits through his eyes that I can’t read, and then he pulls up the corner of his mouth.

“What?” I ask, a

“You’re such a shit,” Dad mumbles softly. “I can’t believe it’s been so long since I had all these worries about you and her up there.”

“What are we going to do now?” I ask resignedly.

Again, he sweeps crumbs off the table. “You know what’s really special about the men in this family?”

I have to laugh. “Not really, Dad.” My opinion of the men in our family is not good, Emilia. Each of us has been colossally lucky with our wives.

Dad is undeterred. “We are incredibly attached to family and to the woman we have chosen. And in the end, we always return home no matter which path we take.” Then, he stretches as if he is emotionally exhausted and has to regenerate. His back cracks and he comfortably stretches his legs. “Now, get the cognac, Mason. The good one Caden stole from me.”

The only thing left for me now is to believe my father’s words because anything else would drive me completely insane, Emilia.