Rustic Hearts

Sophie

 

Daddy and I sit and rock for a long time without saying anything.

“I forgive you, Daddy,” I finally say into the darkness.

He reaches over, takes my hand, and squeezes it tightly, and I see a tear roll down his cheek. I don’t think I’ve ever seen him cry before.

“You’re going to have to forgive her too, darlin’.” He motions toward the headlights that are coming down the driveway.

A black SUV pulls in front of the porch. The back door opens, and my mother steps out.

“How?” I ask.

“I called her this morning when you bolted from the attorney’s office. She got on the first flight she could.”

Mom speaks to the driver, and he pulls an overnight bag from the hatch and sets it on the step. Then, he returns to the truck and pulls away.

Mom stands in the drive, watching the taillights fade off, and then she turns and brings her eyes to mine. She is a mess. Her eyes are puffy, and her nose is bright red. Vivian Marshall is always put together. I don’t think I’ve ever seen her so distraught.

“Hi, Mom,” I say.

She looks up and smiles. “Hi, baby,” she replies carefully. “Jefferson.”

He stands and walks down the steps toward her. “Hello, Viv.”

She bursts into sobs as soon as her name leaves his lips.

He wraps her in his arms and whispers soothing things into her hair. Words I can’t make out, words that are private, just between them.

Once she has better control of herself, he lets her go. He picks up her bag and carries it up the steps. He stops and looks down at me, waiting for permission. I nod that I’m okay, and he walks into the house.

She stands in the drive, wringing her hands for a couple more minutes. Then, she musters the courage to come up and take a seat beside me.

As she sits, Braxton comes barreling from the front door. He looks down at me.

“You all right?” he asks as Daddy comes up behind him and clasps his shoulder.

I smile up at him. “I’m fine.”

He looks at my mother and back to me. “Are you sure?”

“Yes, Brax, I’m sure. We’ll be inside in a minute.”

Daddy tugs at his shoulder, and Braxton reluctantly backs into the house.

“Brax?” Mom asks.

“Braxton Young. He is Daddy and Madeline’s nephew.”

“He seems … intense.”

“That’s one way to describe him.”

“Is he the reason you have stayed all this time?”

“One of them,” I admit to her and myself.

“Sophie, I love you—” she starts.

I interrupt, “I’ve never doubted that, Mom. But that’s not the point. You lied to me. You have been lying to me my entire life. You let me feel unwanted. You let me hate him.”

“I know.”

“Why?”

“I didn’t want you to hate me because I was the one who had done the terrible thing to your father. Because I was selfish and scared of losing you.”

“None of that makes it okay.”

“I know.”

“I’m angry, so angry, with you right now.”

“I deserve that, but I hope you can forgive me, Sophia. You’re my onliest only, and I can’t lose you. Please.”

“You’ll never lose me, Mom. But you can’t make me be who and what you want me to be. You can’t manipulate me any longer.”

“I won’t. I promise. Just come home, and I’ll make it up to you,” she begs.

“You can’t. You can’t make up for the twenty years I lost with Daddy. You can’t bring Gram back and give me back those missing memories.”

I take a deep breath and make a decision.

“I’m not going back to New York.”

“What? Sophia, please. What about your apartment and your business? You can’t give all that up because you’re angry with me.”

“I’m not going to give anything up. I’ll figure it out. Charlotte and I have been handling things just fine the past month, and they need me here now that Gram is gone. They need help ru

“You’re punishing me,” she whispers.

“No, I’m not. I’m just righting a wrong. You stole time from me, Mom. New York is wonderful, and there’s so much to appreciate about it, but it can feel cold and unfriendly sometimes. I stand on a street teeming with thousands of people, and I feel lonesome. I’ve had this sadness living inside me all these years that I didn’t understand. Now, I do. New York is not home. Not for me.”

Her head falls in her hands.

I get up, and I kneel in front of her chair. I take her hands in mine, and she looks down at me.

“You’re not losing me. I’ll be flying up to the city all the time. I’ll still have to be in the office for meetings, and I’ll visit. Besides, if I give up my apartment, I’ll have to stay with you and Stanhope or Charlotte when I do.”

“You’ll stay with us,” she insists, and I know I have her.

“Okay. I’ll stay with you.”

“Promise that you won’t stay out here and fill your life with all these people and forget me.” She sniffles.

“My heart is big and roomie, Mom. It doesn’t have to be you or them. Not anymore. I have enough to go around. It’s a well that won’t go dry if other people drink from it.”

She wraps her arms around my neck, and we hold each other for a long while.

“You know, I think you’ll find you needed to be released from the weight of these secrets too,” I say over her shoulder, and she nods.

Braxton and I drive Mom to the hotel in town. On the way, she grills him about his age, his responsibilities on the ranch, if he wants to get married one day, and if he wants children. He’s polite, but I know his patience is ru

On the ride back to the ranch, I get lost in my thoughts as I stare at the countryside passing by the window.

“Pe

“Just trying to figure out how I’m going to break the news to Charlotte that I’m staying in Poplar Falls.”

“So, you’ve decided for sure?”

“Yes, at least for now. Aunt Doreen can use my help, and I think Daddy and I need more time. What do you think about me staying?” I bring my knees up onto the seat and turn to face him.

“Are we having a real conversation?” he asks as he slides his eyes to me.

“It doesn’t have to be if you don’t want it to be. I just need to know how to proceed from here. I know that what started between us happened when we both assumed I’d be gone in a few weeks. I don’t want you to think I expect anything from you.”

“What do you want, Princess?”

“I really don’t expect …”

“I didn’t ask what you expected. I asked what you wanted.”

“I know I want to wake up, curled up with Hawkeye every morning,” I tease.

“That damn dog, always stealing my girl.” He pulls over on the side of the highway, and he pulls me into his lap. “I guess I’ll just have to learn to share.”

Then, he brings his lips to mine and kisses me breathless.

“If you’re pla

“I think they know,” I whisper.

“They might have a clue,” he confirms.

“You think there’s room enough for us both?”

“If there’s not, I’ll build you another room. I’ll build you a studio. Whatever you need, we’ll figure it out.”

I grin. “Would you be willing to install a bathtub?”

“I bet you could persuade me.”