Alien in the Family

My cell phone rang. My purse was by the side of the bed, so didn’t take too long for me to dig it out. “Jeff, what’s wrong?”

“I will not get bored with you. I am not going to force you to cook. My jealousy is never going to go away, get used to it. Yes, I want kids, I’m sure we won’t have a problem, and from what my father’s said, you’re never really ready to have them, you just think you are. Stop worrying or else I’ll have to hurt James in order to get up there with you. I love you, go to sleep.”

“I miss you.”

“Me too. Last night like this, okay? I think that’s James’ sadistic point.”

“Yeah. Would you have named your Poof Murphy if it hadn’t been named Harlie?”

“No idea. Happy I don’t have to worry about it. Go to sleep, baby. Tomorrow’s a big day.”

“Do you like your tux?”

He laughed. “Yes. I just hope you like it. Reynolds insinuated I’d love your dress.”

“I hope so.” I was starting to get sleepy, but I didn’t want to get off the phone.

“You want me to talk you to sleep?” He sounded amused, not upset.

“Sort of. The Poofs aren’t the same as being with you, you know.”

“Thank God. You like the nightgown?”

“Oh, it’s from you? I thought it was from James.”

“There’s nothing like your bride-to-be saying she thought the lingerie you bought her was from another man to make you feel all warm and secure.”

“Oh, stop. He’s been doing everything else. I’m afraid he’s going to drop dead from the exertion.”

“He’s having a field day, I’ll give you that. So, you don’t like it?”

I laughed. “I do like it. I didn’t spend a lot of time looking at it, because I didn’t realize it was from you.”

“Oh, that’s fine, then.” He sounded reasonably pleased.

“You want me to get up and look in the mirror or something?”

“Yeah,” his voice dropped to a purr. “Then think about me.”

“So you can see me?”

“Yeah.”

“Mmmm . . . that sounds interesting.”

“Yeah.” His voice was still a purr. I heard Christopher in the background and Martini sighed. “My na

“Okay. I’m tired anyway.” I was, but it had sounded kind of weird and fun at the same time.

“I love how you think.”

“Then I’ll go to sleep thinking of you.”

“Sweet dreams, baby.”

“They will be. I promise.” Closed the phone, snuggled back up into the pillows and the Poofs, and went to sleep.

My last thought was that maybe, for once, nothing would go wrong with a big, important extravaganza. Our track record wasn’t that good, but I optimistically hoped for a reprieve. Did kind of think I’d earned it.

CHAPTER 67

SOMEONE SHOOK ME AWAKE. It felt like a man’s hand. “Jeff?”

“No. Time to get up, girlfriend.”

I cracked an eye. “It’s dark.”

Reader sighed and walked away. I tried to go back to sleep. I heard a noise and there was bright light right in my face. “What is that?” Flung a pillow over my eyes.

“We call it sunlight on our planet. Get up. We are, as usual, ru

“James what are you doing in here?”

“Getting you and the rest of the females moving.”

“Get the guys up first.” I rolled over.

Covers were pulled off. Poofs started grumbling. “Interesting, you sleep commando. Bummer, though . . . I’m still gay.”

“Then go away.”

He laughed. “You want me to give it a shot anyway?” He grabbed my ankles and pulled me to the edge of the bed.

“Oh, fine.” I rolled over and sat up. “There, sitting up. What time is it, anyway?”

“Nine. You’re supposed to be at the salon at nine-thirty.” He dragged me to my feet and into the bathroom. “Shower. Quickly. Don’t worry about your hair.”

“James.” I said this with as much whine in my voice as humanly possible.

He kissed my forehead. “Do it, or I’ll tell Jeff I saw what he wants no other man, gay or straight, ever seeing.”

“He’ll pick it up if you enjoyed it.”

Reader patted my butt as he shoved me into the bathroom. “Guess I’d better plan to say that I object to the wedding, then.” He closed the door but I could tell he was waiting.

“I want to, you know, before I shower.”

“Fine. I’ll be back in five minutes. If you’re not in the shower, I can’t be held responsible for my actions.”

“Nazi.” I whispered it under my breath. Then felt guilty. “Okay, not a Nazi. Just suddenly a major anal retentive.”

“Heard that, both thats. Get into the shower.”

“Eavesdropper!”

“Laggard.”

Decided he was more awake than me and so likely to win the war of wit right now. Started the water. Showering quickly wasn’t an issue if Martini wasn’t with me. Dried off, wrapped the towel around me. Checked to see if the coast was clear. It was, unless I counted Reader standing there with his arms crossed.

“That’s the fastest you could shower?”

“I had to shave my legs.”

“Fine, I’ll accept that excuse.” He checked my legs out. “Okay.”

“What, you didn’t believe me?”

He rolled his eyes. “Put on the white dress Jeff bought for you. It’s a color match to your wedding dress.”

“Well, how lucky.” I looked at him. “Where are you going to be while I do this?”

“In here.”

“James, we’re about at that point where Jeff and Paul might have real reasons to question us.”

“Yeah. However, there are seven other naked women out there and I’ve already seen everything you own. So I’m sticking with you. I’ll turn my back.”

I looked closely at his head. “Geez, you know, you already have stubble.”

“Yeah, thank God.”

“I didn’t realize your hair grew so fast. That’s really manly and virile.” At least, in my opinion.

“Back to that part where Jeff and Paul start worrying, babe.”

“Fine, fine.” Went into the huge closet. “I put my wedding lingerie on before I get into the wedding dress, not now, right?”

“Right.” He sounded distracted.

Peeked out to see him sitting on the edge of the bed. He had his back to me, and he was playing with the Poofs, the three with me and his own. It dawned on me that he wasn’t an empath. I got dressed and sat down on the bed next to him. I hugged him from behind. “I’m sorry, James. You’re doing everything I couldn’t even think of doing or have pla

He chuckled, but I felt him relax. “It’s okay, girlfriend. I know how it is. The person in charge always gets the complaints.”

I leaned my head against his back. “I’ll stop complaining. Because everything you’re doing is beyond wonderful, and I appreciate it a lot more than I’m managing to let you know.”

Reader shifted and hugged me back. “It’s okay. I understand, don’t mind, and love you, so even when you’re being a pain in the butt, you’re still my girl.”

“I love you even when you’re cha

The Poofs crawled into our laps and started purring. “The love in the room is amazing. Let’s move before Jeff or Paul come in and I have to turn straight, because we’ll have to run off to the Free Women’s planet in order to escape their wrath.”

“Wise choice.”

We got up, and I got the critical eye. “Not bad. If we’d had to, you could have gotten away with this as your wedding dress.”

“Only if we wanted my side of the family to die of embarrassment. This is sort of revealing for a wedding gown.”

“The lingerie helps.” He rubbed his hands together. “Grab your purse, load up the Poofs, and let’s get going.”