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When a baby is inside his mother, we can give him the best of what is in us, keep him safe, bear him to fruition and go through birthing together. After that we feed him milk, rock him to sleep, hold him close to our breast. In the first few years of life a baby is very dependent on her parents. She is almost helpless; she needs to be dressed, have her nappies changed and bottle held. But the older a child becomes the more independent he becomes and the more interest he shows in the surrounding world. And we simply need to accept that sometimes this can be very complicated.

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The first time my daughter pushed me away was at 11 months when I was trying to calm her down. I hugged her to my breast and she gave me a push with her little hand, as if she wanted to get up and go somewhere else. At that second I felt a feeling impossible to describe. I suddenly understood that she had grown up somewhat and wanted to be more independent… I saw that the world was calling her mercilessly. A great deal of curiosity and the desire for adventure were awaking inside her. Only sometimes after bathing time would she suddenly recall the lost state of absolute comfort – of being in her mother’s womb

When children grow up parents often bring them to account: “I carried you in my womb, fed you, cared for you, and now you owe me!” Let the situation go. A child doesn’t owe you anything. Right at this moment he is giving you an indescribable experience. Being inside a woman, he is already transforming, and cleansing his parents whether they want it or not. A baby gives such invaluable lessons in life which we can already feel eternally grateful for.

We are witnesses to the realization of a new life. We have been given a unique opportunity to observe this process, this history which is being created right before our eyes. The first step, the first sound uttered, are all unbelievable moments in a child’s growth and development. What could be more wonderful?

First place in life

During a seminar for women we were told that women often put their children or husband in first place, conferring large-scale hopes and expectations on them. How deep is the disappointment when things suddenly don’t turn out as expected?

What are we to do? If you need to lay everything out in order then put the Supreme, the Spirit, your spiritual task on this Earth, yourself first and only then the rest: family, husband, children, your work, favourite hobby and so on. Children grow up and go their own way, creating their own families. They choose where they want to go next. We are left one on one with ourselves with the same path stretching out before us; the path which we started our journey from with a huge forest of hopes, possibilities, meetings, experiences and fulfilled or unfulfilled ambitions…

Now l will begin to walk you through pregnancy week by week.

Week 1

At some point everything changed. Irrevocably and on a massive scale the changes took place inside me. Masks fell apart, other people’s dreams and expectations vanished – everything that had been put upon me but was not mine simply fell away… Juan said that people didn’t change and if they did, it was in extremely rare situations co

A second heart began beating inside of me…

I desired to conceive from my beloved man with all my heart. Every day we stated our intent and put all our energy of love into creating a new being. We visualized our baby together.

Parents’ visualizations

What joy it is to see children’s toys strewn around the rooms of your house! The heart leaps from the inexplicable joy that a child has come into your house, and that that child is your dear little one, your own flesh and blood. A child is a sun, which lights up the whole house with her light. A child is pure, playful, light energy which flits in the air energizing the space and people around him.

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When I became pregnant I would often close my eyes, stroke my stomach and imagine what my child would look like. What little feet, hands, eyes and hair it would have. When parents are pregnant, they are rich with imagination about what kind of child will be born. Will it be a boy or girl? What eye colour and facial features will he or she have, who will she or he be similar to and so on.





It is at this stage that parents need to put their maximum effort and intent into giving birth to a healthy, happy, beautiful, joyful baby and direct energy towards positive intent, thereby trying to form a favourable future for their child. But of course in the end Spirit decides everything about who will come into this world. We are merely those who meet the new guest after they fly into this Universe on their spaceship. Our task is to receive the one who has come to us. Receive them and be able to love them, be their friend and guide in this life.

When my daughter was born I would look at her for hours on end, studying her gaze and smile. I was getting to know the being who had come here to fulfill her aims and personal mission.

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My mentors taught me women’s visualization. What is this? Of course, this is a topic for a whole other book, but I will explain the essence of the matter here.

Woman’s visualization is the way in which a woman sees her world through her dreams and how she forms reality around her. While men have to learn how to do this, a woman has this knowledge from birth. She just needs to awaken it. She will be shown and told everything without having to ask anyone to teach her. A woman’s body has all the answers. Woman’s dreaming always comes easily.

If a woman sees that all her titanic efforts yield no results, that all the things she is aiming towards are stopped short again and again and energy doesn’t flow freely, it only means one thing – that she is not treading on woman’s path, and most importantly, that she has strayed from HER OWN path.

I will describe a technique for forming and launching the intent to conceive a child. Always remember what your intent is and what it is for. Be responsible for your images, dreams and wishes since they have the tendency to come true.

Creating a visualization sphere

Between my eyelashes lie thousands of visions…

Visualization Sphere

Extend an energy cord similar to an umbilical cord from the centre of your womb and create an energy sphere attached to it in front of your stomach. Mould it with your hands as you would a snowball. On an outbreath fill it with your strength, which for a woman collects in her centre – the womb. Blow your visualization into it. These are your dreams and desires.

Inside the sphere clearly imagine the event which you would like to see in reality. Here it has already come about and you are now observing it, painting in each and every detail in colour. In my case, I would visualize the baby that I had already given birth to. I would draw her facial features, hair colour and imagine what kind of character she would have.

Then, the most important thing is to let the sphere go. Don’t hold on tightly to it and nervously wait for the event to come true in your lives because this way you block the energy of intent by not letting it flow freely. It’s like cutting the umbilical cord or letting a balloon fly into the sky. First you hold it by a string feeling the movement of air. And when the right wave comes you loosen your grip, letting the balloon fly away. It disappears into the clouds, borne up and away by the Wind of intent…

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Remembering what my mentors had taught me, I allowed myself to feel woman in her essence, that is, to be relaxed. We decided to go to Egypt for a month. Egypt had been calling me for a long time; flitting images from past lives gave me the feeling that that my roots were there. Jo