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"What do you want?" I asked. My voice came out colder than I expected.
"I need to talk to you," Daniel said.
"I ... I can't." I placed my drawing on top of my supply bucket and shoved it under my table. "Come on, April. Let's go."
"Grace, please." Daniel held his hand out to me.
I flinched. His hands reminded me of the things he'd done to my brother. Would he have tried to do the same things to me if he'd known I was the one who turned his father in? "Go away." I took April's arm for strength.
"It's important," Daniel said.
I hesitated and let go of April.
"What, are you crazy?" she whispered. "You can't stay with him. People are already talking." I stared at her. "Talking about what?" April looked at her shoes.
"Hey, you girls coming?" Pete asked from the art-room doorway. Jude stood next to him, gri
"Coming," April said. She gave me a pointed look and then broke into a huge smile. "Hey, guys," she said as Jude wrapped his arm around her waist.
"You coming, Grace?" Pete held his hand out to me just like Daniel.
I looked at the three of them in the doorway. April tilted her head and gestured for me to come. Jude looked at me and then glanced at Daniel; his smile faded into a thin, tight line.
"Let's go, Gracie," Jude said.
"Please stay," Daniel said from behind me.
I couldn't bring myself to glance at him. All Jude had ever asked me to do was stay away from Daniel. I failed in that promise originally, but I had to keep it now. I couldn't talk to Daniel. I couldn't be with him.
I could not choose Daniel over my brother again.
"Leave me alone," I said. "Go somewhere else. You don't belong here."
I took Pete's outstretched hand. He locked his fingers around mine and pulled me to his side, but his touch didn't make me feel the way I did when I was close to Daniel.
AT THE CAFÉ
I was six bites into my veggie burger, Pete was on reason three of his "Five Ways Hockey Could Change the World" lecture, and April was squealing with delight because Jude had just given her a blueberry muffin with an invitation to the Christmas dance when it fully hit me: I told Daniel to get out of my life. I dropped my burger and ran for the restroom. I barely made it to one of the toilets before garlic and seaweed burned up my throat.
When I came out of the stall, Ly
"Bad veggie burger," I mumbled, and stuck my hands under the faucet.
"Whatever." She chucked her paper towel into the trash and left.
Chapter Twenty
Fears
That night After di
I took the key out of my music box and unlocked the drawer. I removed the book from the box, curled up in my comforter and pillows, and carefully turned to the second marked page.
A little bedtime reading couldn't hurt anyone, right?
Dear Katharine, I am increasingly convinced that Alexius's stories of the death Dogs are not mere myth. I wish to document as much as I can about this phenomenon.
Father Miguel says I am obsessed. But I fear he is the one with the obsession. He has persuaded large numbers of our campaign that they must punish the Greeks for their murder and betrayal. Even many of the Templars and Hospitalars are convinced by his inflammatory words. I find Alexius's stories a welcome distraction in all this plotting and persuasion.
Alexius took me to a blind prophet who taught me more on the subject. While some Urbat, as he called them, are born with the wolf essence, others are created when bitten by an existing Urbat--much like the spreading of some terrible plague.
It may be that an Urbat created through infection, rather than birth, is more susceptible to the influences of the wolf. The curse may progress much more swiftly in the infected party if he is not vigilant in controlling his emotions
Daniel hadn't mentioned that his wolf condition was contagious. I couldn't believe that I had actually wanted to be like him, and now it made my mind spin to realize that it was as simple as a bite from his teeth---almost as simple as a kiss.
I looked at my hands and couldn't help picturing them covered in shaggy fur. My fingernails grew long into pointed claws that could rip flesh from bone. My mouth suddenly felt like it was full of razor-sharp teeth and long, tearing fangs. What would my face look like with a long snout and muzzle? What if my eyes turned black, with no i
What if I became a monster, too?
I shuddered and pressed my hands to my face. My skin was still smooth and hairless. I was still human.
I picked up the book, hoping to find solace--to find answers. But the letter stretched on for several more pages, and most of it documented how the Dogs of Death had come to exist--how their blessing became their curse. It confirmed what Daniel and my father had told me but didn't teach me anything new. I skimmed until I came to a portion that mentioned moonstones.
It is strange, dear Katharine, but the blind man says that the Urbat have much greater difficulty controlling the wolf possession during the night of the full moon. As if the moon itself has power over them. Because of this, think there may be a way to manage these beasts. Perhaps if an Urbat were to keep a small piece of the moon close to his body, it would act as a counteragent to the effects of the larger moon, helping him keep the wolf at bay while still retaining its mythical strength. Much like how the ancient
Greeks treated disease with the idea that like cures like.
I have heard tales of rocks that fall in fiery glory from the heavens. What if some of these rocks have fallen from the moon itself? If I were able to fashion a necklace from one of these moonstones--if finding one was possible--perhaps I could help the Death Dogs reclaim their blessings.
However, such a necklace would be no cure. It would only offer control. I fear that these Urbat have lost their souls to the clutches of the wolf, and unless they are freed of it before they die, they will be doomed to the depths of hell as demons of the dark prince.
My eyes no longer felt weary. I hadn't thought of what might happen to Daniel if he died. Would he really be doomed to live in hell as a demon forever? No wonder he was so desperate to find a cure. It would be one thing to live with a monster inside--it was a whole other thing to be damned for all eternity.
I skimmed a few pages farther, looking for anything that might tell me more.
The only things powerful enough to deliver a mortal blow to an Urbat are the teeth or hands of another demon, or if he is punctured through the heart by an object of silver. It is believed that silver is poisonous to the beasts
I didn't want to think any more about death, so I turned to a new letter.
My Dear Katharine, I wish to take an expedition into the forest. The blind man says he will find me guides who can get me close enough to deserve a pack of Urbat without being discovered. The journey would cost twenty marks--all that I have.