Draculas

Then again, he was old and dying, and maybe just a little bit jealous.

"Help me up, Sha

With the morphine flowing, it felt like he floated over to his desk.

He opened the middle drawer, glancing out the big windows into the San Juan Mountains beyond a gaping canyon. The peaks were flushed with alpenglow, the snowfields pink as the sun dropped over southwest Colorado.

Lost in thought, Mortimer hitched up his tailored black pants--so loose now he had taken to wearing the gold-buckled belt left to him by his father--and ran his fingers over the Ouroboros insignia sewn into the breast of his red, silk robe. Then he reached into his desk drawer and took out the bottle he'd been waiting years to open, fighting a moment with the wrapper and cork. At last, he splashed a little of the rosewood-colored liquid into two tumblers.

"I'm not really much of a whiskey drinker," Sha

"Humor me."

Mortimer raised his glass, already catching whiffs of the fierce dried fruits and peat wafting toward him.

"To you, Sha

"Many times."

They clinked glasses and drank.

"That's disgusting," Sha

Mortimer shook his head.

"What?" she said.

"Nothing, it's just that this is a fifty-five year Macallan. I paid $17,000 for that bottle many years ago, knowing I wouldn't crack it until a night like this came along."

"You paid too much," she said.

"Some things are worth the price. Shall we?"

They returned to the couch, and Mortimer sat down and dug the Swiss Army knife out of the patch pocket of his linen shirt. It shook in his hands as he opened one of the smaller blades.

"Let me," Sha

He recoiled. "No!"

Mortimer inserted the blade and gently tugged it through the tape. He put the knife away and opened the box, pulling out wads of crumpled, foreign newsprint until he felt the smaller box within the larger. He lifted it out, set it on the glass.

It was some kind of black composite, sealed with a steel hasp on each side. He'd had the box specially made, then sent it to the farmer to ensure safe delivery of the item. Its key hung around his neck on a gold chain.

He unlocked the hasps and flipped them open, gingerly lifting off the top half of the box, bringing it onto his lap as Sha

Sha

Mortimer stared into the hollowed eye sockets, and then the teeth, which more resembled the dental architecture of a shark than a human being.

Not at all what he'd been expecting, and it didn't match the artist' conceptions in any of the scandal rags. This wasn't a skull from an old Christopher Lee Hammer film. This was an affront against nature. Mortimer found it difficult to breathe. But he also registered something else, something he hadn't felt since his diagnosis.

Excitement.

"May I?" Sha

Reluctantly, Mortimer handed Sha

Sha

"Coffee-drinker," she quipped, and then her eyes narrowed and Mortimer watched as her i

"What?"

"These canines are hollowed."

"What's the significance?"

"I don't know. It's not dissimilar to venomous snakes." She opened the mandible. "Look at the articulation. That range of motion is unbelievable. The jaw structure is...reptilian. There are literally too many teeth to fit in this mouth. See how they overlap? They would've shredded the lips off, most of the cheek, exploded the gums, ripped apart the ligaments in the mandible."

"What are you saying? It's fake?"

"It looks real. No doubt. But it's just anatomically impossible."

Mortimer leaned closer. "Is it human?"

"Does this look human to you?"

Sha

"So...what is it?" Mortimer whispered.

"It's certainly hominoid. But unlike anything I've ever seen. Nothing like this exists in the fossil record. This shouldn't exist."

"But it does exist. It must be real."

"Look, we'll have it tested. It's possible the skull is authentic, but the teeth have to have been implanted."

"Do you know what I paid for this?"

"No, what?"

"Just give it back."

Sha

"Mort, I'm really excited for you. Really. And I can't wait to get started studying this."

Mortimer's eyes went wide with surprise. "You're...going? Now?"

"I want to stay. But I promised Clay. He wants to take me--wait for it--to the Ta

"Jesus Christ. He must have elephantine genitalia."

"Mortimer!" She gave him a playful bump on the shoulder.

"What? There's no other explanation. I mean, really? Another gun show?"

"Maybe not."

Something in her eyes...trouble in paradise? He hoped so.

He held up the skull, cradling it in both palms. "This is the reason you're here, Sha

The mandible was still open. The old man grazed one of his liver-spotted fingers across the points of the teeth--razor sharp. He was sure he was only imagining it, but they seemed to send an electrical current through his body.

"Mort? You go

He looked up at Sha

To be young enough again to satisfy a woman like that.

Mortimer smiled. "I hope so."

Then he pulled the skull into his neck, clamped shut the ancient jaw, and the last thing he felt before losing consciousness were those razor teeth sinking through the paper-thin flesh of his throat.

Sha