Hearts of Blue

Dipping his head, he caught my lips in a kiss and pulled me on top of him. Both his hands stroked my thighs as he stared up at me, his eyes hooded.

“I like you,” he murmured.

“I like you, too.”

“You shouldn’t be so cynical about what we could be, you know.”

I crinkled my brow. “What’s that supposed to mean?”

“It means I know what you were playing at just now, talking about me having kids, like the idea of you being in my future is such an impossibility.”

“Lee,” I said, air whooshing out of me when his thumbs dug into my muscles, massaging out the kinks. “My dad would disown me if he knew I was with you.”

“So what? You don’t even like the man.”

“I know that, but he’s my father. Besides, he’s a product of his environment. My parents grew up at a time when you couldn’t walk down the street without worrying if a bomb was going to go off. That kind of thing hardens people.”

“Hmm.” Lee gri

“Don’t ‘hmm’ me, you cheeky little shit. And what’s the grin for?”

“It’s for the fact that you’re go

“Oh, really?”

“Really. So hard it’ll rewire that brain of yours, so afterward, when you think about the future, all you can see is me in it.”

Reaching up, he palmed both my breasts, then bent forward and captured one of my nipples in his mouth. The action rendered me incapable of doing anything but surrendering. And when he flipped me over and pulled me onto all fours, he made good on his promise, because it might have been morning, but I really did see stars.

Thirteen

I was laughing so hard I had to bend over and hold my stomach, so hard that tears were rolling down my cheeks. Tony and I were sitting in the break room eating lunch and trying not to wet ourselves as Keira did an impression of DI Je

“Constable, tuck your shirt in and straighten your tie. You look like the vagrant lovechild of Keith Richards and Worzel Gummidge.”

“Stop!” I begged, trying to calm my laughter. “I haven’t heard anyone use Worzel Gummidge as a reference since I was five years old.”

“That’s because you never bloody listen, do you, Sheehan? Cotton wool in the ears,” Keira clipped, not dropping the act.

I swiped a thumb under my eyes, finally calming down, and glanced up. The smile immediately fled my features, because standing in the doorway was none other than Je

I wanted to tell Keira that she’d been caught, but I knew it’d only make her worry. If Je

Leaving the break room and hurrying down the corridor, I made my way to her office, knocking gently on the door before stepping inside. What I saw when I entered made me wish I’d waited for her to call me in, because Je

“I, uh, I’m sorry, ma’am. Excuse me,” I said, and turned to leave.

“Don’t you dare,” said Je

“That’s not why I….”

“Then why did you?” Je

“I don’t really know. I just wanted to apologise, I suppose, for what Keira was doing, and for laughing. Mostly for the laughing. You don’t deserve that kind of behaviour, and it’s unprofessional on our part.”

Well, maybe she did deserve it just a little, but I wasn’t going to say that to her face.

“Unprofessional behaviour from you is no great surprise, Sheehan. Christ, look at your father.”

I gave her a fu

Je

She glanced up in surprise. “Pardon?”

“You hate my dad like he murdered your grandmother or something. Why?”

Je

“No, I want to know. I’ve never done anything to you, yet you treat me like I’m a piece of dirt on the end of your boot. I deserve to be told the reason.”

A silence fell, and Je

Her question seemed a little random, but I answered anyway. “Um, she’s fine.”

“I’ll bet she is,” Je

“Oh, my God,” I whispered, gaping at her in disbelief. “No way.”

“What are you prattling about?”

“You and my dad.”

Je

“You and my dad had a thing, didn’t you? Wait, don’t answer that. I don’t want to know.”

She stared, her blue eyes cutting into me like a knife, and all at once I knew it was true. My dad had an affair with Je

“Your father is a spineless coward,” said Je

“Spineless?” My brow furrowed.

“Spineless,” Je

My gut churned again, this time for a very different reason. I wanted to think she was lying, but she had no reason to, and her story didn’t sound made up. In fact, the longer I contemplated it, the more it sounded exactly like something my dad would do.

“Go on, tell me I’m lying,” said Je

“I believe you,” I whispered, and her eyes flared in shock. A moment passed between us, and I didn’t know what to say. In the end, I went with a simple, “I’m sorry that happened to you. And I’m sorry my dad is spineless coward.”

Because he was. And even though Je

***

By the time I got home from work that evening, I felt emotionally drained. I couldn’t stop thinking about Je