Attack of the BULLIES

“C’mon, guys! Leave me alone,” he begged. The thought occurred to him to flip his laser lense down on his glasses and blast the bullies to kingdom come, but he and the others had vowed not to use their gadgets on civilians. It would blow their cover, and their devices were too dangerous. But that didn’t mean he had to take a beating.

He pulled his fist back and swung. Matt Phaltz went sprawling across the sidewalk with a puffy eye. The only problem was, Rupert had missed. His fist had never co

Dumbfounded, Rupert looked around just in time to see Phaltz’s toadie Mitch crumple to the ground, followed by Ty and Paulie—all at the hands of a nerdy girl with glasses and poofy yellow hair, a redheaded kid who was probably half the size of Phaltz, and a man in a black tuxedo, holding a cane.

The girl smiled. “I hope you don’t mind, Four Eyes. I’m allergic to bullies.”

“Who are you?” Rupert asked.

“Ruby Peet, and let me say what an honor it is to meet one of the greatest members of NERDS that ever lived. I’ve read all your files and—”

Rupert flipped the laser lens on his glasses and prepared to fight. His secret was out, and clearly these enemy agents had been sent to kill him and the others. “I don’t know who you are, but you won’t take me alive,” Rupert said. He’d heard someone say that on an episode of S.W.A.T. It seemed appropriate.

“We’re not here to hurt you, Rupert,” the boy said.

Rupert could feel the heat in his glasses as his laser prepared to fire. “I asked you who you are. Someone better start talking!”

The man hobbled forward. “My name is Agent Alexander Brand, and I’m the director of the National Espionage, Rescue, and Defense Society from the twenty-first century.”

“The twenty-first century!”

“Some bad guys are coming and only you can help us stop them,” Ruby said.

“How can I help you? I don’t get activated for three weeks!”

“We need you, pal,” their redheaded friend said. “And we need your team—the greatest fighting force the world has ever seen.”

“Next thing she’s going to tell us is she’s from outer space. Do you know Luke Skywalker, too?” Carmello said when Rupert’s team had reassembled to hear Ruby, Agent Brand, and Heathcliff plead their case.

“Wow, you are even more a

“If you’re NERDS from the future, show us your gadgets,” May said.

Ruby looked at Heathcliff, then back at the kids. “We don’t have gadgets. We’re the gadgets. I’m filled with these things called nanobytes and—”

“Nano-what?” Mi

“Microscopic robots that enhance our weaknesses,” Heathcliff said.

“Fascinating,” Mikey said.

“Oh, yeah?” Carmello said to Heathcliff. “What can you do?”

“Well, um … I used to have these big buck teeth and I could hypnotize anyone who looked at them, but they got knocked out and now I’m in between powers … but Ruby’s got superallergies,” Heathcliff said defensively.

“Superallergies!” Carmello shouted. “The future sounds pretty bogus. I’m going home to play Pong.”

Ruby stepped in front of Carmello. “All right, big guy. You want proof: Try to get past me.”

“I would never hit a girl or a person wearing glasses, and you’re both.”

Carmello tried to step past her, but Ruby stopped him with a punch to his flabby chest.

“Ow! That hurt!”

“Keep coming,” she said.

“I’m not fooling,” Carmello roared. “If you hit me again, I’ll—”

Before he could finish, Ruby slapped him in the face five times.

“I’m allergic to empty threats,” she said.

Carmello stomped his feet like an overgrown toddler. His face was red from anger and welts. “Fine!” he shouted, charging like an angry bull. Ruby leaped up and roundhouse-kicked him in the face. He fell down hard and stayed there.

“Let’s see her attack a smaller target,” Mi

Heathcliff watched Ruby move with lightning speed and land thunderous punches at what looked like nothing but air. She spun around and there was an “Oof.” She shot her knee upward and there was an “Aargh.” She jabbed a wicked uppercut and then there was a thump followed by a weak “I quit.”

When Mi

“This is a very important mission. The people we are going to confront are dangerous. Can we count on you?” Brand asked the bewildered kids.

Rupert nodded. “We’re in. We’ve only got one problem,” Rupert said. “We’re actually really lousy spies.”

“The worst,” Mikey said.

Ruby looked at Heathcliff and Agent Brand. “What can we teach them before I disappear?”

Heathcliff, Ruby, and Brand led the NERDS into a training room. Heathcliff was thrilled not only to meet such legends but also to feel like a full member of the team once again. Ruby was no longer giving him meaningless jobs to keep him busy.

Brand taught the children all he could about submission holds, pressure points, using leverage against opponents, and using their minds to combat muscles. His years of secret-agent training and knowledge of dozens of fighting styles were spread out before the freshman spies, and Heathcliff hoped they would take advantage of what they learned.

Ruby focused on intelligence, preparing the children for the environment they would soon visit and going over all the information about the BULLIES and Miss Information she had collected.

Heathcliff turned his attention to each of the children’s gadgets, helping them understand their capabilities, and even managed to find new ways to use them. Rupert could combine lenses to produce a bright flash that could temporarily blind an opponent. He expanded Macramé’s handiwork from yarn and knitting needles to rope and wire and even discovered she could chisel away at hardened concrete with her superfast hands. He taught Ghost how to expand her cloaking technology to hide other people and objects as big as cars. He taught Static Cling how to create a charge in his hair that he could hold and build in strength, making his electrical blast infinitely stronger. Mikey wanted to be known as Fantastic Boy for his ability to invent gadgets on the fly. Unfortunately, of all the agents, he was the most vulnerable in a fight.

“So,” Mikey said, grim-faced. They sat before a workstation he was using to create his inventions. “I sort of stink.”

Heathcliff shook his head. He knew exactly how Mikey felt. “No, you have the best gadget of the bunch. You’ve got a very imaginative brain. Your head will probably save the world more than the other gadgets combined. What have you been working on? Maybe there’s something here that you can use as a weapon.”

Mikey showed him a long stick with a claw on the end. When he pushed a button on its tip, the claw contracted. “It’s for getting things off of high shelves. I call it the Gator Grabber.”

“Um, probably not going to be much help unless your bad guy is hiding on top of a Christmas tree,” Heathcliff said. “What else?”

Mikey handed him what looked like a harpoon gun with a plunger on the end. “This is the Suction Gun. It’s also for getting things off of high shelves.”

“Right,” Heathcliff said as he tried to hide his nervousness. “You seem to have a thing about high shelves.”

“I’m tall, so everyone asks me to get things for them,” Mikey grumbled. “I build these things so people will leave me alone.”

“OK, but we need something that might be intimidating,” Heathcliff said.

“Oh! I got it!” Mikey scooped up what looked like a pair of Moon Boots made of metal. He slipped them on his feet and gri