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They were quiet on the short ride, and Ella wished she could know what he was thinking. Her thoughts were all over the place, scattered and unorganized. He was saying—and doing—everything she could possibly want him to, but she was still wary. She wanted so badly to believe everything was possible for them, but until last night he’d not given her any reason to have one ounce of faith where he was concerned.
Hearing he could picture her as the mother of his children made her want to say to hell with caution and get busy making babies. More dangerous thoughts . . . She’d reined him in, but she needed to do the same to herself. Jumping ahead to someday wasn’t wise when today required all her focus and attention.
Gavin followed her up the stairs to her apartment, each of them carrying grocery bags. This would be the first time he saw her home, and the thought of that made her oddly nervous.
She was so rattled she nearly dropped her keys. The door swung open and the scent of the sage candle she’d burned last night greeted them.
“Smells good in here,” he said as he followed her into the kitchen in the back of the small apartment.
“My favorite sage candle.” She loved being able to share even the simplest of things with him, such as her favorite scent and where she kept her cereal. Ella loved stashing his Cake Batter ice cream next to her Cherry Garcia. She loved knowing his favorite kind, and that he loved cookies, ham and white bread, as gross as that was.
Ella was reaching for the cabinet over the stove when his hands landed on her hips, making her forget what she’d been about to do.
He gathered her in close to him, his chin on her shoulder. “Sorry, but I couldn’t stand to go another second without touching you.”
She closed her eyes and focused on continuing to breathe as his nearness overwhelmed her.
“Did you need something up there?”
Gavin’s question didn’t compute until she realized he meant the cabinet. “I don’t remember what I was doing.”
His low rumble of laughter sent goose bumps down her arms and backbone. “How long do we have until we have to head to your parents’ house?”
“About forty minutes.”
He brushed aside her hair and began placing kisses on her neck that made her legs go weak under her. Fortunately, he had an arm locked around her waist to keep her from sliding to the floor. No man had ever had such an effect on her, and she was wise enough now to know that no other man ever would. He was it for her. He always had been, which was why the stakes were so high in this new game they were playing.
Then he was turning her and she couldn’t spare the brain cells to think about the high stakes or the game. Not when Gavin Guthrie was apparently pla
She wanted to kiss him—badly—but more than that she wanted to know his thoughts. “What’re you thinking right now?”
“About how much I want to kiss you. I’m asking myself if this is real, if I really get to kiss Ella Abbott any time I want to. I’m wondering how I got lucky enough to have someone like you care so much about someone like me.”
She curled her hands around his wrists and felt his pulse hammering under her fingers. “What does that mean? Someone like you? What’s wrong with you?”
“Everything,” he said softly. “Every freaking thing is wrong with me, but for the first time in a long-ass time, I want to make what’s wrong about me right. For you.”
Ella went up on tiptoes to join her lips to his. Like him, she couldn’t believe she was now allowed to kiss him any time she wanted to. She was going to want to often. She hoped he was prepared for that. Judging by his enthusiastic response, he was more than prepared.
His hands slid down to cup her bottom, and then he was lifting her.
Ella curled her legs around his hips, bringing his hardness against her softness and drawing gasps of pleasure from both of them. Then he was lowering her to the sofa and coming down on top of her, all without losing a beat in the tongue-twisting kiss.
This kiss made the one they’d shared last summer at the beach in Burlington seem like child’s play in comparison. She’d spent all the months since thinking she knew what it was like to kiss Gavin. She’d known nothing. The kiss on the beach had been just the start of what they were capable of together.
His hand slid under her sweater and came to rest on her ribs, making her skin burn under the heat of his palm. He broke the kiss, looking down at her as if to gauge her reaction. Then he pulled back, taking his nice warm hand with him.
“I’m sorry.”
Ella covered her face with her hands.
He tugged on them until she gave way. “What did I do this time?”
“You stopped!”
“Because we have somewhere to be.”
She glanced at the clock on her cable box. “In thirty minutes.”
“That’s not enough time for what was going to happen on this sofa if I hadn’t stopped when I did.”
Her heart beat erratically. “What was going to happen?”
“Clothes were going to start coming off.” He leaned in to tug on her sweater. “Starting with yours.” His lips were swollen from kissing her, his jaw was covered in stubble, and brown plaid fla
Not that she would say no to that . . .
“Quit looking at me like that,” he said gruffly.
“How am I looking at you?”
“You know. I’m trying to be honorable by not jumping you the first chance I get, and you’re lying there looking all sultry and sexy.”
“Am I?”
“Ella! Stop it.”
“I’m not doing anything.”
“You’re breathing. That’s enough for me.”
“I keep thinking I’m going to wake up, and it’s going to be Saturday night and my Cherry Garcia would’ve melted during the time I had this amazing dream about sleeping with Gavin and grocery shopping with him and making out with him.”
“You’re not dreaming, and neither am I. For the first time in a very long time, I’m having a really good day, and it’s all because of you.”
“Thank you.”
“Do not thank me. All the thanks goes to you, my little bulldog.”
“Um, is that supposed to be a compliment?”
“Yep. You were tenacious like a bulldog, never letting me get away with anything and calling me out on my shit. You have no idea how much I needed someone to do that.”
“I’m glad I helped, but let’s retire the bulldog analogy.”
Smiling, he tugged on her hand. “Let’s get going to your parents’ place so I can talk to your dad about the work he wants done before di
Reluctantly, Ella let him help her up, but she wished they had nowhere to be so they could continue with the kissing. The kissing was good. Very, very good.
“Is it okay with your mom if I come to di
“Oh yeah. She makes enough to feed an army every week. I think my aunt Ha
“I haven’t seen him in years. He’s in Boston, right?”
“Uh-huh.”
“Did he ever get married?”
Ella pushed her feet into the moccasins that had fallen off when he carried her to the sofa. “Nope, but you can hardly blame him after what he went through with his parents.”
“No kidding.”
Ella’s uncle Mike had walked away from his wife and eight children when the older kids were in high school and the youngest ones still in elementary school. “A lot fell to Gray as the oldest. He really stepped up for his mom and siblings. He probably has zero desire to have his own family after all that.”
“Do they ever hear from their father?”
“Occasionally, but it’s nothing regular.”