Fusion

I’d had her. So close. And, instead of cherishing her, I’d let her slip through my fingertips when I hadn’t been looking. She was everything I’d ever wanted—everything I’d ever want—and I’d had to lose her to realize that.

I was such an idiot.

I’d never go after her while she was happy with someone else. But, if he fucked up, I’d be right there, ready to comfort her. And, when she was ready, I would be, too. No more cowardice. No more hesitation.

I just hoped that opening eventually came—even if wishing for it made me a bastard. So be it.

As Da

It’d been over a month since our first date, and even though we talked nearly every night on the phone and saw each other at school, this was only our third date. Between football and cheerleading, our weekends were often too busy for us to go out. He hadn’t yet asked me to be his girlfriend, and I didn’t even know if I wanted him to. I knew he was getting a

I wasn’t sure why, every time he closed in, I turned my cheek. I told him I wanted to take things slow. After all this, this was my first experience with any sort of romantic relationship, and I was hesitant to go too far too fast. I wasn’t scared. It’s just… I didn’t quite know how I felt about Da

I moved his hand back to his own thigh. He groaned and leaned his head against the wall.

“Sierra, you’re killing me here. It’s been over a month and you won’t even let me kiss you. I get it. You’re young, but I thought we’d be a little further than this by now.”

My nerves rose as he stared down at me. “I don’t… I’m not…” I stammered, sounding like an idiot. What did he expect? I mean, I knew his reputation, but he’d always been sweet and patient with me.

“What about homecoming, Sierra? There’s an after party, and I was thinking I could get us a hotel room. I can properly introduce you to everything physical. It can be romantic if that’s what you want,” he told me, ru

“A hotel room?” I gulped, my eyes widening as I shook my head. We’d never even kissed. What the hell was he expecting with a hotel room? I slid my chair back and grabbed my purse. “Excuse me. I need to use the restroom.”

I spent a couple of minutes trying to calm my nerves in the bathroom. When I finally settled my stomach, I splashed water on my face and then walked back towards our table.

What I saw stopped me in my tracks. Apparently, Da

Part of me knew that it was my fault for trying to date someone I wasn’t all that interested in, but that didn’t mean it didn’t hurt. Not to mention everyone in school would know about this by Monday. Da

Mallory gave me a wicked grin when she looked up and saw me. Da

“Sorry, Sierra. I just don’t think we’re compatible,” he offered.

“Right.” It wasn’t a great comeback. “Have fun, assholes.”

As I turned to leave, Da

I wasn’t sad because this thing with Da

“Thank goodness,” I answered, ready to turn on my heel and flee.

My initial reaction was relief. But a second one hit me square in the chest. I wanted Jeremy. Clearly, a month of barely spending any time together had done little to squelch my desire for him.

Mallory, however, had one last dig to get in. It was as if she read my mind.

“Oh, and, Sierra, if you plan on calling your knight in shining armor, I wouldn’t bother. I saw him earlier with a blanket on the beach. You wouldn’t want to interrupt, now would you?” Her taunting made me want to rip her over-bleached blonde hair out of her head. “Especially if he’s with Heather.”

That, more than anything, was what made me want to break down. The idea the Jeremy was off getting physical with someone when I couldn’t even kiss a boy I’d thought I’d liked. With the flick of my middle finger, I turned and ran, pushing the door to the restaurant open just as the tears began to fall. Not wanting anyone to see me, I rushed in the direction of the beach, blinded by my tears.

I ran as fast as I could, racing in the sand when, out of nowhere, I tripped over something and went flying, taking a face full of sand. My mouth sputtered as I tried to spit it out.

“Sierra?”

My heart stopped. I quickly rose to my feet and groaned when I saw that I’d tripped over Jeremy. Sure enough, he was sprawled out on a blanket, and I covered my eyes before I could see who he was with.

“Sorry! Sorry, I didn’t mean to interrupt. I’ll be fine. Just…just leave me alone, Jeremy. Enjoy your date.” I nearly choked on the words as I fled, ru

When I fell to my knees, a year’s worth of tears started to spill out. It was finally happening. Jeremy was dating. This was harder and so much more painful than I’d expected, if the sudden ache in my heart was any indication.

Moments later, the very object of both my affections and my current consternation showed up. I wiped my eyes, trying to mask my tears.

“I thought I told you to leave me alone,” I said curtly.

His eyes softened in the moonlight. “That’s not possible, Sierra. You know that. I’ll never leave you alone.”

I choked out a disbelieving laugh. “You can’t go ru

He folded his arms across his chest and stared at me. “That’s the second time you’ve mentioned my being on a date. I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

“The beach. The blanket. Mallory said you were on a date. Sorry for interrupting.”

I wasn’t actually sorry. And I didn’t feel bad for it.

“I’m not on a date. I’m here by myself. Solo. Single. Just me. But what about you? Weren’t you supposed to be on a date?”

My heart was far too happy at his admission. Even so, I let out a wry laugh and shook my head. “You were out enjoying the peace and quiet. You don’t want to hear about my disastrous date. I’ll be fine. You can leave me alone.”

Instead of doing that, he reached his hand out. I stared at his silhouette in the moonlight. Suddenly, I wanted nothing more than to place my hand in his and embrace his warmth. So I did.

We walked to his blanket, and he didn’t drop my hand. He was silent until we sat down, and then he brought his hand to my cheek, wiping my tears away.

“Sierra. How many times do I have to say it? Where you go, I go. I’ll never leave you alone. Especially when you’re hurting. Now, tell me why you’re crying and whose ass I have to kick.”

At that, I laughed and felt better than I had in the last month. God, I’d missed him.

He listened as I told him about Da