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“This is for you, Katie,” I begin. Then, when the place is almost silent in anticipation, I continue. “Tonight will be my last fight. I’m officially retiring.”
And then all hell breaks loose. Screams erupt, voices yell, cameras flash, and a mob of frenzied fans rushes the cage. The gate, still ajar until the fight begins, is pushed open and people rush in. Security forces their way through to my opponent and me, ushering us out of the stadium and back into the locker rooms. To safety. To calm. To the consequences.
FORTY-FIVE
Katie
I hit the release of my umbrella and shrink it as quickly as I can so that I can push my way through the crowd. When I get to the aisle, I run as fast as I can for the tu
My lungs burn as I launch myself toward them, frantic to get to Rogan before he does something irreversible. I skitter around the concrete corner and burst through the double doors at the end of the short hall. All eyes turn toward me, but I only see one set, the only set that matters.
They are the clear green of a princess-cut emerald being held up to the light. And they are focused on me.
“Don’t do this for me,” I blurt breathlessly.
“I want to,” he says, edging his way toward me where I stand near the door. “This is me showing you that you’re the most important thing in my life.”
My heart slams against my ribs. “All you had to do was say so.”
“Words aren’t enough. You need to see that I’d do anything for you. I’d give up anything for you, I’d take on anything for you. I’d run, I’d fly, I’d fight. I’d do anything to prove to you that I love you. That I’ve always loved you.”
I wanted so much to hear him say it again. Just one more time. Or a million. Or every day of forever.
I feel the sting of tears. I don’t even try to hold them back this time. I’m too happy to hold them in. “I love you, too.”
His shoulders sag and he drops his head. My heart stutters in alarm as I take in his posture. He doesn’t look happy. He looks . . . defeated.
“God, Katie,” he begins softly. “I wanted you to love me. More than I’ve ever wanted anything.” He raises tortured eyes to mine. “But I knew I couldn’t give you what you needed.”
“You were all I needed. Only you. I thought it was the fighting. Then I thought I couldn’t get past you working with Sims. But then I got a taste of life without you, of what it feels like to truly be dying inside. That’s when I realized that I can do anything for you. That I’m tough enough to live now. Because of you. I was tough enough to stand up to the Simses. I was tough enough to fight back. And I was tough enough to come here. To you. Because you’re all that matters to me.”
“I don’t ever want you to hurt for me. Ever. You’ve been through too much.”
“I hurt for you when I’m not with you. I’ve been burned alive and I’ve never been in more pain than I was when I was without you.”
His lips curling up into a small grin, Rogan moves toward me, not stopping until I have to crane my neck to look up into his gorgeous face. “Woman, you broke me. I didn’t think I was going to make it.”
I swallow hard, hating to think of him hurting, but at the same time loving that he was as miserable as I was. “Let’s not do that to each other again.”
He reaches up to tenderly cup my face. “Deal. Don’t ever leave me and we’ll be good.”
“Done,” I say with a smile, my heart lighter than it’s been since I was a child.
Rogan brushes his lips across my forehead, down my temple and around to the corner of my mouth. My whole body is humming in anticipation of his kiss. I feel as though I’ve been starved of it for an eternity.
But it’s not to be. A gruff voice interrupts our moment. “The cage has been cleared. Now damn it, get the hell out there and stop giving me trouble,” Johns grouches. “I can’t believe you’d pull this shit without telling me.”
Rogan leans back and grins down into my face. “See what I have to put up with?”
“Poor you,” I say. “Is there anything I can do to make it better?”
“Ask me after the fight.”
“Rogan,” I say, staring up into his eyes, as serious as I can be. “Please don’t retire because of me. Don’t make a choice like that because of—”
A long finger comes to rest across my lips, silencing me. “This part of my life is over. I’m ready to move on, to start something new. With you. Something where my body isn’t sore unless you make it sore.” The sparkle in his eyes and the smile on his lips bring a warm buzz to my muscles. My cheeks sting as I imagine Johns listening to our every word and rolling his eyes in displeasure.
“Well that’s about the best damn excuse for retiring that I’ve ever heard. Now kiss her and get your ass out into that cage,” Johns barks.
I risk peeking at him over my shoulder. He’s gri
“I love you, baby. With everything I am.”
“And I love you, my tough fighter. Now go win something.”
“I already won the best prize, but I guess I can throw in another little something for you.”
I smile as he kisses my knuckles and makes his way toward the door.
“Come back sore. I think I can help you out with working out the kinks.”
“I won’t be long,” he says, turning to jog out the door.
I’m standing in the same spot, staring at the last place I saw Rogan when the door flies open and bangs against the wall. Rogan makes his way to me in long, determined strides, takes me in his arms and kisses me for all he’s worth. My heart, my body, my soul sings with relief. I don’t know how he knew, but I needed this. Desperately.
When he has kissed me breathless, he leans back, brushing a strand of hair behind my ear. “I love your hair, by the way.”
I feel the warmth flood my cheeks. For the first time in five years, I wore it up today. It’s a loose, sexy style that I used to favor. Before. But now the only before and after I care about are before Rogan told me he loved me and after. All the many years of after. “I wanted to be tough today. For you. For me.”
“Tough looks amazing on you. I always knew it would.”
“Thank you,” I say, casting my eyes down in an old habit.
As he’s done dozens of times before, Rogan lifts my face toward his. “You never have to hide, especially from me. I love you just the way you are. Beautiful, perfect, real.”
“Thank you for fighting for me.”
“I never stopped.”
No, he didn’t. And he never will. He’s my fighter. My love. My Rogan.
EPILOGUE
Rogan
Five months later
“Good for you, Mona,” Katie says from her seat. I glance over to see her typing something into her phone.
“What’d she do? Use ‘onomatopoeia’ correctly?” I grin just thinking about Katie’s friend and her new love of the dictionary.
“No, she dumped White. She says she wants the dream now. I guess seeing how happy I am, how you treat me and how a good relationship works has made her see White for the cheating crapbag that he is.”
“Cheating crapbag, huh?”
She giggles and leans her head back against the seat to smile over at me. “I got tough, but my words are still . . . mild.”
“I think in this case, you could spare something a little tougher, don’t you?”