The James Bond Anthology

For, only a couple of hours earlier, Major Dexter Smythe’s already dismal life had changed very much for the worse. So much for the worse that he would be lucky if, in a few weeks’ time – time for the sending of cables from Government House to the Colonial Office, to be relayed to the Secret Service and thence to Scotland Yard and the Public Prosecutor, and for Major Smythe’s transportation to London with a police escort – he got away with a sentence of imprisonment for life.

And all this because of a man called Bond, Commander James Bond, who had turned up at ten thirty that morning in a taxi from Kingston.

The day had started normally. Major Smythe had awoken from his Seconal sleep, swallowed a couple of Panadols (his heart condition forbade him aspirin), showered and skimped his breakfast under the umbrella-shaped sea-almonds and spent an hour feeding the remains of his breakfast to the birds. He then took his prescribed doses of anti-coagulant and blood-pressure pills and killed time with the Daily Gleaner until he could have his elevenses which, for some months now, he had advanced to ten thirty. He had just poured himself the first of two stiff brandies and ginger ales, ‘the drunkard’s drink’, when he heard the car coming up the drive.

Luna, his coloured housekeeper, came out into the garden and a

‘What’s his name?’

‘Him doan say, Major. Him say to tell you him come from Govment House.’

Major Smythe was wearing nothing but a pair of old khaki shorts and sandals. He said, ‘All right, Luna. Put him in the living-room and say I won’t be a moment,’ and went round the back way into his bedroom and put on a white bush shirt and trousers and brushed his hair. Government House! Now what the hell?

As soon as he had walked through into the living-room and seen the tall man in the dark-blue tropical suit standing at the picture window looking out to sea, Major Smythe had somehow sensed bad news. Then, when the man had turned slowly to look at him with watchful, serious blue-grey eyes, he had known that this was officialdom, and when his cheery smile was not returned, inimical officialdom. A chill had run down Major Smythe’s spine. ‘They’ had somehow found out.

‘Well, well. I’m Smythe. I gather you’re from Government House. How’s Sir Ke

There was somehow no question of shaking hands. The man said, ‘I haven’t met him, I only arrived a couple of days ago. I’ve been out round the island most of the time. My name’s Bond, James Bond. I’m from the Ministry of Defence.’

Major Smythe remembered the hoary euphemism for the Secret Service. He said, with forced cheerfulness, ‘Oh. The old firm?’

The question had been ignored. ‘Is there somewhere we can talk?’

‘Rather. Anywhere you like. Here or in the garden? What about a drink?’ Major Smythe clinked the ice in the glass he still held in his hand. ‘Rum and ginger’s the local poison. I prefer the ginger by itself.’ The lie came out with the automatic smoothness of the alcoholic.

‘No thanks. And here would be fine.’ The man leaned negligently against the wide mahogany window-sill.

Major Smythe sat down and threw a jaunty leg over the low arm of one of the comfortable planters’ chairs he had had copied from an original by the local cabinet-maker. He pulled out the drink coaster from the other arm, took a deep pull at his glass and slid it, with a consciously steady hand, down into the hole in the wood. ‘Well,’ he said cheerily, looking the other man straight in the eyes, ‘what can I do for you? Somebody been up to some dirty work on the North Shore and you need a spare hand? Be glad to get into harness again. It’s been a long time since those days, but I can still remember some of the old routines.’

‘Do you mind if I smoke?’ The man had already got his cigarette case in his hand. It was a flat gunmetal one that would hold a round fifty. Somehow this small sign of a shared weakness comforted Major Smythe.

‘Of course, my dear fellow.’ He made a move to get up, his lighter ready.

‘It’s all right, thanks.’ James Bond had already lit his cigarette. ‘No, it’s nothing local. I want to, I’ve been sent out to ask you to recall your work for the Service at the end of the war.’ James Bond paused and looked down at Major Smythe carefully. ‘Particularly the time when you were working with the Miscellaneous Objectives Bureau.’

Major Smythe laughed sharply. He had known it. He had known it for absolutely sure. But when it came out of this man’s mouth, the laugh had been forced out of Major Smythe like the scream of a hit man. ‘Oh Lord, yes. Good old MOB. That was a lark all right.’ He laughed again. He felt the anginal pain, brought on by the pressure of what he knew was coming, build up across his chest. He dipped his hand into his trouser pocket, tilted the little bottle into the palm of his hand and slipped the white T.N.T. pill under his tongue. He was amused to see the tension coil up in the other man, the way the eyes narrowed watchfully. It’s all right, my dear fellow. This isn’t a death pill. He said, ‘You troubled with acidosis? No? It slays me when I go on a bender. Last night. Party at Jamaica I

James Bond looked down at the tip of his cigarette. ‘Not exactly.’

‘I expect you know I wrote most of the chapter on the Force for the War Book. It’s a long time ago now. Doubt if I’d have much to add today.’

‘Nothing more about that operation in the Tyrol – place called Ober Aurach, about a mile east of Kitzbühel?’

One of the names he had been living with for all these years forced another harsh laugh out of Major Smythe. ‘That was a piece of cake! You’ve never seen such a shambles. All those Gestapo toughs with their doxies. All of ’em hog-drunk. They’d kept their files all tickety-boo. Handed them over without a murmur. Hoped that’d earn ’em easy treatment, I suppose. We gave the stuff a first going-over and shipped all the bods off to the Munich camp. Last I heard of them. Most of them hanged for war crimes, I expect. We handed the bumph over to H.Q. at Salzburg. Then we went on up the Mittersill valley after another hideout.’ Major Smythe took a good pull at his drink and lit a cigarette. He looked up. ‘That’s the long and the short of it.’

‘You were Number 2 at the time, I think. The CO was an American, a Colonel King from Patton’s army.’

‘That’s right. Nice fellow. Wore a moustache, which isn’t like an American. Knew his way among the local wines. Quite a civilized chap.’

‘In his report about the operation he wrote that he handed you all the documents for a preliminary run-through as you were the German expert with the unit. Then you gave them all back to him with your comments?’ James Bond paused. ‘Every single one of them?’

Major Smythe ignored the i

Here, Major Smythe was saying the whole truth. He had had a dangerous and uncomfortable war until 1945. When the Commandos were formed in 1941 he had volunteered and been seconded from the Royal Marines to Combined Operations Headquarters under Mountbatten. There his excellent German (his mother had come from Heidelberg) had earned him the unenviable job of being advanced interrogator on Commando operations across the Cha