Infatuation

“We’ll see you this afternoon.” I give him one final look before spi

I hold myself together until I make it halfway down the hallway. Only then do I let out a shaky breath as the day’s first stream of tears come.

Jesus, I’m just a crying mess these days.

I didn’t want to have to do this, but I know if it were me in this situation, I’d want someone stepping in. I know Brooks and this isn’t him. This is a man too caught up in watching his wife sleep the days away, and he’s missing the bigger picture. I’m not going to sit back and allow him to shut down like this. Not like I did, especially when Mia needs him.

If I have learned anything the last month, it is our time is irreplaceable, and it can be taken away in a blink of an eye.

Not only am I going to start living in time, but I will make sure Brooks is there with me.

Mia deserves it.

Kelly deserves it.

I deserve it.

“Just take a deep breath, and relax,” I remind myself two days later as I hear the rumble of Beau’s bike pull into the drive. “You want this. No, you need this.” I place the rope I found in Beau’s draw at the end of the bed.

It’s not like I’m trying to convince myself to do it, because I know I want this, but more to calm my nerves. I’ve been pla

I hear the front door click open and my body locks.

Shit.

“Kenzie?” Beau’s voice comes down the hall.

“Down here!” My voice shakes with nerves, not believing this is about to happen. His footsteps grow louder along the wooden floor while I take my position.

“What you doing in here, darlin’?” Beau pushes the door open and stops short when he notices me.

“Hi,” I whisper, watching his eyes darken with need, lust and hunger.

“What the fuck you doing, Kenzie?” His Adam’s apple bounces up and down three times before he slowly swallows.

“What does it look like?” I arch my back a little, pushing my breasts out a bit more. I’m fucking nervous, but I’m adamant I won’t let him see it.

He hasn’t moved his body, his eyes traveling from my naked body to the rope at the end of the bed.

“Mackenzie.” He groans, and then takes one step toward me.

“I want this,” I rush out, not wanting him to reject me or stop this. “I need this.” He slowly takes another step toward me, licking his lips in a slow, sensual way. The last couple of days I’ve been going over everything in our relationship, and I didn’t know what was holding me back. Until I realized I never gave Beau full control. It kind of became lost in the mess our life has become.

“Haven’t had my cock in you since Kelly’s accident and you want me to do this?” I can see his apprehension and possible confusion, but I can’t have him second-guessing this. I need the controlling man I fell in love with.

“Beau, I need this. I need you to make me feel. Make this doubt go away.” He drops his cut to the floor and rips his shirt over his head.

Leaving his jeans in place, he takes four large steps to the end of the bed, places his knee to the comforter and crawls up over me.

“Doubt?”

“That I’m not good enough for you.” I hold his stare, willing him to take it away.

“You’re more than enough.”

“I believe you believe it, but I need you to show me.” He closes his eyes and sits back on his heels.

“You sure you want this?” His eyes darken as he looks down at me.

“Never been surer. I’m ready.” He doesn’t reply. Instead, he leans back and reaches for the rope.

“Are you going to listen to everything I say, Kenzie?” he asks, looping the rope around my left wrist and pulling it up over my head to secure it to the headboard.

“Yes, Beau.” I nod as he pulls it harder. The rope rubs against my skin, the friction making this all the more real. This is going to happen.

He reaches for my other hand and secures it next to the one above my head.

“I’m not going to do your feet tonight, darlin’. Want you to wrap these long legs around me later,” he tells me. My breath hitches when his mouth moves to my erect nipple, pulling it into his mouth and sucking hard.

“Ahh!” I arch at the sharp pain, before exhaling in pleasure.

“Who’s this body belong to Mackenzie?” He pulls back, circling my wet nipple with his finger.

“You, always you,” I answer, knowing it’s the truth.

“And who controls this body, Kenzie?” He lowers his mouth just above my other nipple, waiting for my answer.

“You, Beau. Always you.” His lips wrap around my nipple when I answer correctly, sucking it with the same intensity as the first one. Pain sears through me before he strokes me back to pleasure.

“You have the prettiest nipples I’ve ever seen.” He draws back, and gently blows a breath over it. My hands pull on my restraints, my natural instinct to touch him takes over. I blow a frustrated breath realizing I just gave my control up. No touching.

“Tsk, tsk.” He sits up and watches me with a deep hunger before reaching over into his nightstand and pulling out a small package. “I got these for you a couple of weeks back,” he murmurs, pulling out a small black box. My eyes grow wide seeing the image on the package.

Nipple clamps.

“Are you going to use them on me?” He reaches in and pulls out what looks like a long metal chain with a clamp on either end.

“Yes,” is all he says, before throwing the empty box to the side and coming back to hover over me.

“Been dreaming about using these on you since the first time I had you.” He dips his head low, and pulls my nipple between his teeth for a few seconds before letting it go.

“Holy shit.” I breathe through the light sting. “Is it go

“No, darlin’. It’s go

I draw in a sharp breath through my teeth, the sting unlike anything I’ve ever felt before pushes me out of my comfort zone.

“How’s it feel?” he asks, pulling back to have a better look.

“It stings.” I start to pant, not sure if I’m in pain or highly turned on, and have no idea what I’m talking about.

“Good.” He moves over to my other nipple. Repeating the same actions, he squeezes my nipple between his thumb and forefinger, before slowly and gently releasing the clasp onto my swollen nipple. He fiddles with the tightening screw before resting back.

“Fucking hell, darlin’.” His finger circles my left nipple, trailing it over the clamp, down the metal chain over to my right nipple. “It’s even better in real life.” He leans down and flicks his tongue over my nipple.

His cock grows harder against my stomach, but I can’t give it too much thought. I’m lost in a haze. He repeats the same action back over to my left nipple.

When he’s happy with his work, he slides down my body, trailing soft, wet kisses on my skin. His beard scratches along my stomach, as every inch of me comes alive. Every touch and each breath brings me to the crest of something bigger.

“Spread wider for me, darlin’,” he orders. When he settles his body between my legs, his warm breath dances over my skin. Doing as I’m told, I part my legs, exposing myself to him.

A hiss passes his lips as his eyes settle on my exposed pussy.

“I want you to come on my face. Been thinking about it every day for the last month,” he tells me before ru