Mambo in Chinatown

I said nothing.

“Because I can’t abide losing.” And with that, he released me and walked away.

—

I didn’t want to stay in our room and have to answer all of Nina’s questions when she returned. I couldn’t sleep now anyway. I thought about what that student in the elevator had said about the sauna. I undressed, grabbed a robe and followed the signs to the sauna downstairs. I hadn’t brought a bathing suit but it was deserted anyway. I took off the bathrobe and hung it up, wrapped a towel around myself and lay down on my stomach on the heated wooden bench. I cradled my head in my arms. What had I done? I’d hurt Julian and now he was angry at me too. What a mess I’d made of everything. I closed my eyes in the steamy room.

I’m not sure how long I lay there but I must have fallen asleep because I woke as the sauna door clicked closed. It was Ryan. He was naked to the waist, wrapped in a towel, with droplets of water dripping from his chest. He must have gone swimming. All of my longing was in my eyes. He crossed the room and knelt in front of my face.

As he reached for me, I stopped his hand. “What about Fiona?”

“We broke up last weekend.”

I blinked, trying to take it in. Ryan was available. “Why didn’t you tell me?”

“I tried. I’m not the smoothest guy, in case you haven’t noticed. I’m not like Julian.”

I had to say it. “I just came from him.”

His face stilled. His open hand clenched into a fist. “Did you—?”

“No. Being with him made me understand how I feel about you.”

I felt him exhale. I peeked from under my lashes. His face was exultant. Then his palms were on the nape of my neck. I let my eyes close again and felt his hand push my towel aside and run down the length of my spine. His lips were at my neck, making their way around to my collarbone. I reveled in his touch; I couldn’t believe that, finally, Ryan could be mine. None of the rest mattered: what Pa might say, what the studio might do. With Julian, I’d been infatuated, carried away by his glamour and charm, but Ryan recognized me as I truly was and filled my soul.

I turned over and wrapped my arms around his neck, pulling him down for my kiss. I arched up and when my naked breasts touched his skin, I felt his sharp intake of breath. Still kissing me, he wrapped his arms around me and stood up slowly, until I was cradled in his arms. Now he let my legs go and I was standing nude on the sauna bench, pressed against him. I was taller than him this way. I bent over and started licking the droplets of water from his neck and shoulders. He tasted of chlorine and salt.

“Come back to my room with me.” His voice was hoarse.

I kept licking. I was kneeling, at his chest now. His hands ran across my body.

One palm cradled my head and tilted my face up. He traced my eyebrow with his finger. “Will you come?”

I nodded. He picked me up and set me by my bathrobe. I put it on, then he tied the sash neatly around my waist. He shrugged his on, took my hand, and we headed upstairs.

—

The next morning, I woke up with Ryan’s arms wrapped around me and turned to him with a smile.

“Good morning.”

With his eyes still closed, he started to stroke my body underneath the sheets. I kissed him and his beautiful eyes opened. He murmured, “I was afraid I’d dreamed it.”

“Me too.” I studied his face, so close to mine.

“Do you regret it?”

“Never.”

His face filled with joy. “I’ve been crazy about you ever since you gave that guy his tip back.”

He kissed me again and again. When he gave me the chance to breathe, I said, “So I think I missed the part where you tried to tell me you and Fiona had broken up.”

“In the van. I was going to say it but I was scared you’d say it didn’t matter, that you didn’t feel that way about me, so I tried to figure out first if you cared about me. You know, pave the way a bit. That’s when you told me you weren’t attracted to any of your students.”

“Oh. I meant my other students.”

“Great, that was very clear. Not.” His smile was crooked. “I wasn’t sure if I should tell you at all. I’m a risk to the job you love, while Julian fits into your life perfectly. He could make you a star. I guess I didn’t know if you’d pick me over him, I wondered if you even should.”

“I realized when Julian kissed me how I felt admiration and affection for him, but no more than that. It’s like you see who I am beneath it all, underneath the dancer and the dishwasher and all of the other labels.”

He pressed his thumb to my lips and started stroking them, then kissed me tenderly. “What about your job?”

“You’re leaving the studio anyway. I think if we keep our relationship quiet for a while, we’ll be all right. What happened with Fiona?”

“I’d known for a while that it wasn’t working, I just didn’t want to hurt her. Then I met you and started to have feelings for you. You contributed to the timing with Fiona, but it would have happened anyway. When I saw her at the wedding last weekend and people started asking us when it’d be our turn, I knew it was all wrong.”

“It must have been hard to tell her.”

He simply nodded. “And how did Julian receive your rejection?” His voice was casual but his eyes were intent.

“He was hurt. He might take it out on us in the competition today.”

“Let him do his worst. What other people think of us, whether we place last or first, isn’t what really matters. If we feel that we’ve danced well, that’s all that counts.”

Now I laid the tips of my fingers against his temple. “I wish I’d met you years ago.”

“I feel the same way.”

“Thank you for sticking with this competition. It meant so much to me that you agreed to do it.”

He gri

My worries about Lisa and Pa came rushing back to me. I rolled over onto my back. “Well, first, I’ve been lying to my family about everything. My father didn’t even discover I’m a dancer until a few days ago, and he was very angry. I think he believes I’m some kind of stripper.”

“Charlie, you’re one of the most honest people I’ve ever met. You must have had good reason and he’ll probably see that someday. Can’t your little sister help him understand?”

I blinked and gazed at the ceiling, trying not to cry. “Lisa’s sick. There’s something wrong with her legs and she’s having trouble walking. She’s been acting strangely. I’m so scared.”

“That sweet girl I met?” I heard the emotion in his voice. He pulled me to him and hugged me tightly. “What burdens you’ve been shouldering alone.”

—

Later, Ryan and I separated so we could go down to the ballroom discreetly.

Nina raised an eyebrow when I slipped into our room. “Well? Was it the smart choice or the dumb one?”

“Brainless is my middle name.”

Nina came over and put her arm around me. “That’s my girl.”

“How did you know?”

She snorted. “So obvious.”

Early that afternoon, Nina and I got dressed for the scholarship competition together. When we were done, she was in a slinky red dress covered with fringe, her hair in a French twist. My bright blue dress glittered with the stones I had spent so many hours sewing on. If only the world could know how many thumb pricks it had cost me. Catching sight of myself in the mirror—the way the dress clung and swung when I moved, the way the light hit my face—I realized for the first time: I looked like Ma.

Then we joined hands and went downstairs to meet our partners.

—

There had to be at least a thousand people sitting at tables watching the dance floor. Cameras were set up everywhere for video, and the professional photographers circulated through the crowd, taking photos during the competition. Ostrich feathers and stones hung everywhere, with the many fragrances perfuming the air. It was now social dancing before our event. The couples on the floor could all actually dance, so it looked like a scene from a Broadway show. The entire crowd in motion rotated counterclockwise as it was supposed to, with the women swirling in their brightly colored evening gowns.