The Scheme

“Get out of here,” Trey seethed. “He’s done with you. You had your chance, and you fucking blew it. Leave.”

I tried to move around Trey, but he blocked my view of Brian. I decided to say it anyway. “I’m sorry. For ever hurting you. For ever thinking that anyone could be better for me than you. For thinking that someone else was it . . . when you were standing right in front of me the whole time.” I didn’t realize I was crying until I felt my cheeks wet from my tears.

When Trey finally moved a little, Brian was looking at me, but his eyes were unreadable. He turned away, as though he couldn’t bear to see me cry, and then he uttered the words that shattered me and crushed the hope I had felt just moments ago. “Just go, Kendy.” Then he stepped inside his apartment, not bothering to look back as Brenda followed after him.

The color drained from my face as my lungs constricted, making it difficult to breathe, difficult to stand. I fell back against the wall, my legs turning to jelly.

There was no sympathy in Trey’s eyes as he followed Brian inside, followed by his girl. When the door shut behind him, both hands flew to my chest as more hot tears coursed down my face. An ache so painful jabbed at my heart.

How could I have been so stupid to let my fears consume me to the point of pushing Brian away? Now my worst fear had come true. It was too late. I was too late.

***

I lay in bed for hours, a crying, slobbering mess. I’d ruined things, and there was no one to blame but myself. As the light of dawn began to shine over my purple comforter, I pulled the covers closer to my chin, wiping my tears onto the blanket.

I couldn’t stop picturing Brian with that girl. It hurt so badly to think of him being with anyone else but me, even though I’d basically thrown him away.

Now I was alone with my pain.

An unbearable ache in the center of my chest spread throughout my limbs. This ache maintained through the evening, only intensifying with every memory of our time spent together. I shut my eyes tightly, but the images of both of them together became more vivid. Bile rose from my stomach to the top of my throat. I felt like hurling last night’s di

Everything the psychic had said was playing in my head—from my father to my career to moving to New York. From my mother’s engagement, and finally to her prediction of my dream guy, the guy who was supposed to mend my broken heart, give me hope about love, life, and my future.

I shook my head, knowing full well that James wasn’t it. I should’ve known all along. I don’t know why I hadn’t seen it. Maybe before Brian it would’ve worked out, but now nothing would ever compare to him. No one else could ever come close.

I didn’t get it. Maybe Beth was right. Maybe my future had changed.

My mind was a jumbled mess. It was like trying to decipher computer code. All I knew was that I loved Brian. I knew it in my core, the type of love that left you breathless and you wanted it to last forever. The type of love that made my heart race and my palms sweat like I was a teenaged girl. The type of love where he was all that occupied my mind, when I was at work, when I was at home, or wherever I was, and all I craved was his company.

After the sun rose, I gave up on sleep and shifted off the bed. One thing Kendy didn’t do was fall down and quit.

I needed to see him, fight for him, fight for our forever. I needed to try again, but not in front of people I didn’t know, and not when Brian was half-ass wasted.

But I was going to fight for him, just like he’d fought for me.

***

BRIAN

Four Tylenols later, I still had a major headache. It pounded painfully as I tied up the garbage bag and carried it down the stairs and out into the fresh outdoors. After seeing Kendy last night, I couldn’t stomach sleeping with Brenda, even though Kendy had most likely been with Stiff.

Still, I knew having sex with her wouldn’t cure the ache, so what was the point? Brenda ended up knocked out on my bed, and I slept on the couch. This morning, I had to wake her up and usher her out so I could really sleep soundly. But sleep never came.

The warm air outside hit my bare chest, and I squinted at the sun above me. The light was intensifying my headache, making my hangover even worse. I trudged over to the dumpster as the stench filtered through my nose, already making my stomach churn. Lifting the lid, I tossed the black garbage bag inside. When I turned around, I had to do a double take.

Kendy?

I was imagining things, probably still half asleep. There was no way she was standing right in front of me, looking like an angel who had fallen from Heaven.

The sunlight shone directly on her, mimicking a halo, but when she spoke and her angelic voice washed over me, I knew I was not dreaming.

***

KENDY

“Hi,” I said, twisting my hands anxiously in front of me. When I saw his lickable, chiseled abs, my mind flickered to Brenda and him together, and the unbearable pain that he’d been with her resurfaced.

“What’re you doing here?” There was bite behind his voice, more now than last night.

“I wanted to talk. Without the audience,” I said softly, but loud enough for him to hear.

Every ounce of me wanted to rush toward him, wrap my arms around his middle, and kiss him, start anew today. I’d never wanted anything as badly as I did in that moment.

“Kendy, there’s nothing to talk about.” His tone was hard, the tightness in his cold stare evident. “You’ve said all you needed to say.” He moved past me, and I took a deep breath, gathering all the courage within me because if he walked away, this would be it for us. The end.

My heart stammered in my chest at an uncontrollably quick pace. “I love you. I love you. I’m so, so, so sorry.” My voice leaked such emotion that he stopped mid-step. But he didn’t turn around. I wrung my hands together, trying to keep my fingers from trembling further.

Warmth spread behind my eyes, an indication that I’d cry at any moment as the magnitude of how much I needed him hit me. “I didn’t sleep with James. Throughout the whole date, I only thought of you.” I threw everything out there, all at once, hoping it would make a difference and praying he’d forgive me. Anything to win him back, to make him love me again.

Please say you still love me . . .

Because I’m utterly and irrevocably in love with you.

***

BRIAN

I tried not to let what she was saying affect me, but it did. I released a sigh of relief. I didn’t know if I could’ve handled it if she’d slept with him. I couldn’t even think about another man touching her without my muscles tensing and imagining beating the douche to a bloody pulp.

I needed to see her face, just so I could drink her in, but I hesitated. I wasn’t sure what this meant, but I was tired of putting everything out there for her and getting shut down.

I wanted to turn around but I was so fucking tired of getting hurt over and over again.

***

KENDY

“I wrote you a poem.” His back was still to me, but I kept on. I hated that I couldn’t read his face or his reaction. My hands shook as I reached in my purse and pulled out any crumpled piece of paper. I was grasping at straws here, using my last life line as I remembered what he’d said when we were drunk and playing ‘I Never’.

Once he stepped away from me, I’d lose him. This was my last chance.

I closed my eyes and inhaled a long, calming breath as my hands began to sweat. “Roses are red. Violets are blue . . . I made a mistake. I love you.” I gulped hard, wrinkling the receipt in my tight grip.

I said it with such conviction, such sincerity that, even though the poem was stupid and I had just pulled it out of my ass, he had to know it was sincere.