The Scheme

The waiter, a taller guy about my age, showed up to take our order. He was looking dapper in his black and white waiter tux, matching all other servers in this fine establishment. “Ma’am, would you like to look over the wine list?”

As I opened the menu, I sca

I smiled, thinking I wanted white wine instead of red tonight, but hey, he asked me on this date, so I was going to go with this.

Still, Brian would’ve known my wine of choice. Plus, he wouldn’t have assumed I wanted red.

Shoving that thought away, I sat straighter. I didn’t need to be depressed tonight. I was begi

The waiter recited the specials of the day and placed the menu down in front of us before leaving us to look over our options. I knew when James had decided on his meal because he closed his menu then started rambling again about work and how much they loved him there. I glanced at his untouched water as he prattled on about other hospitals vying for his attention and wanting him to make a switch.

James was a hand talker. He was giving me whiplash with all the gestures. I had noticed this ma

“I love Manhattan, don’t you?” he asked, like he had finally realized he was on a date and should include me in the conversation.

“Yeah,” I said, no enthusiasm in my voice. I’d never felt more out of place since I’d moved to New York.

Unfazed by my lack of interest, he just continued on, prattling about his undergrad at Purdue and his residency at UCLA. All I did was smile and nod, sensing a headache coming on. All this crap he was talking about, I already knew, since I’d stalked him at the hospital.

Fu

When the waiter returned, he uncorked the bottle, poured our glasses of wine and set the bottle inside the ice filled bucket. As soon as the deep-colored liquid hit my glass, I grabbed it, almost splashing it on my little black dress. I tipped the glass back and stared at my menu, deciding the salmon special sounded divine. What never failed me was my love for food. My stomach was ready to get my eat on. Although the pastas looked delicious, my heart was set on fish.

“Are you guys ready to order?” The waiter angled in my direction. “Ladies first.”

I smiled at him and placed my menu on the table, my stomach already grumbling for the salmon with capers over a bed of vegetables. “I’ll take the fish.”

After James placed his order for a medium steak, he turned my way.

I forced a smile for both of our benefits. “It’s good I’m not on a diet because I’m pla

“A woman with an appetite. I like it.” He offered an easy smile, though it did nothing to my pulse.

“Thanks,” I said, my usual sassy comeback not there.

This date had turned from awkward to plain old weird. Our conversation was stilted, and if I had to rate this date compared to the history of all my dates, I’d rate this top of the list of dry-as-dust boring.

“So, you meeting a ton of people here?” he asked.

“Yeah. I mean, a fair amount. Work keeps me busy, and I’ve met a couple friends who I hang out with outside of work.” Too bad I could count the people I’d really grown attached to on one hand. And now that Brian had left, those friends could now be counted on one finger. Sighing, I looked toward the couple next to us, tired of small talk and feeling sorry for myself.

I was grateful when the waiter interrupted our awkward moment, setting a loaf of bread, parmesan cheese, and olive oil in front of us.

“Enjoy,” he said, leaving us alone to our world of weirdness.

I forced my sullen mood to the side, telling myself again that I had decided to go on this date. I’d agreed to have di

The psychic had predicted it was him. She said I’d meet him at work, and he’d give me the moon. We’d complete each other, just like in fairy tales.

She’d predicted my life’s timeline, spitting it out as the cards laid in front of me. So far, everything had gone as pla

He continued to talk about the charitable associations he was affiliated with, which piqued my interest. It seemed as though he devoted a lot of his time at St. Jude’s Hospital, which was very admirable. But after the waiter dropped our di

Looking at his brown eyes, which matched his dark hair, I wondered what our future would hold. Would it always be like this? Him talking about himself and me biting my tongue, which was so unlike me?

“So tell me about your parents,” I said, interrupting him mid-sentence.

His eyebrows pulled together, like he was confused. My question was simple enough. At least, I thought so.

“We’re estranged,” he replied.

A soft gasp escaped me as my eyes widened. Estranged? Why?

Great. Now my babies would only have my mom as grandma.

“Both parents?” I asked, hoping maybe it was just one.

“Yeah.” He looked uncomfortable, but I needed to know his background, so I pressed on.

“What happened?”

He shook his head. “Doesn’t matter. I’d rather not talk about it. They’ve been trying to reach out, but I’ve been way too busy. Plus, we were never that close.”

I lifted an eyebrow, trying to read any sadness in his eyes. I saw none. Suddenly, any hope of this date pa

He continued to talk about himself again, but I tuned him out, not breaking my sullen daze until he asked about Brian.

“Was that guy I saw you with the other night your boyfriend?” His tone turned lightly suspicious.

I flinched, not sure how to answer. No one had ever asked me to explain my relationship with Brian, even though it had been brief.

“No,” I answered and, when that one word left my mouth, the pang in the center of my chest resurfaced.

I wasn’t about to divulge how we had been doing the friends with benefits thing, but it had become so much more toward the end. More than I ever imagined it could be.

Well, whatever it had been when we’d started, it was nothing now. We weren’t even on talking terms.

“That’s good.” He looked relieved as he grabbed my hand. “I’ve had my eye on you for a while.”

Oh really? I wanted to ask, but I bit down on my tongue before my smartass mouth started flying off. I wondered if he’d noticed me before he’d left with the girl at the bar. I wondered if he’d noticed me the first time or second time when he’d left with someone else.

“Have you ever had a long term relationship before?” I sassed. “It doesn’t seem like you’re ready for anything serious.”

I hadn’t even fazed him. “I’m looking for something serious, but haven’t found the right woman yet.” His words sounded memorized, and I wondered how many women he’d used this one-liner on. More importantly, how many women had fallen for it?

“But you know, maybe I’m looking at her,” he said with a cheesy wink.

I blinked, unable to form words or even give him a reaction. As I stared at him, it hit me, the reality of my life. How strong I’d thought I was, yet so very afraid. How I had been living according to what had not even happened yet. And staring into James eyes, I knew we could never be. Ever. Not in a million years. Not even when the stars aligned.