Naked Greed

“Because last night you drank as much as I’ve ever seen you drink, and I had to put you to bed.”

“What are you talking about? I put myself to bed, the way I always do, unless Viv is home, then she puts me to bed. By the way, Viv is why I called. I agreed a while back to speak to some of her client’s employees at a gathering this evening, and she just called to tell me that the client is bringing his daughter, who she would like you to partner with at the di

“Do I have to listen to you speak?”

“I’m the entertainment—you’re a lucky guy.”

“What’s the woman like?”

“I hear she resembles a camel, but that’s right up your alley, isn’t it?”

“All right. What time and where?”

Dino told him.

“Hey, what happened about going to New Jersey?”

“What are you talking about?”

“Last night you said you and I were going to go out there and arrest Gene Ryan.”

“Are you crazy?”

“Certainly not. We were going to collar the guy and bring him back.”

“An ex-cop and the police commissioner were going to arrest a guy in Jersey without an extradition warrant and bring him back to the city?”

“That was your plan, as I recall.”

“Listen, pal, you must have been a lot drunker than I was. See you at seven.”

—

Two NYPD detectives and two New Jersey state cops found Ryan’s apartment and hammered on the door. Nothing. They hammered more and still, nothing.

“So what now?” a Jersey cop asked. “You want to break it down?”

“Anybody here object to a little, ah, informal entry? Just to have a look around?”

“You think we do that sort of thing in New Jersey?”

“Sure, I do.”

“Go ahead, if it makes you happy,” the Jersey cop said.

The detective produced a set of lock picks, and two minutes later they were inside.

“Hey, nice place,” the Jersey cop said.

“Better than I had thought,” the NYPD cop replied.

They had a look around. The furniture was handsome, the prints on the wall were nice, and the clothes were neatly put away in the closet/dressing room.

“What have we here?” the Jersey cop asked, pointing into the closet.

“I’d say that’s a thousand-dollar safe,” the NYPD cop replied.

“I guess you want to look in there, too, huh?”

“I’d love to know what’s in there, but I’m no yegg. Anybody here can open that safe without dynamite?”

All heads were shaken.

He looked through all the clothes. “There’s nothing in this place that even identifies the occupant,” the NYPD cop said. “We may as well get the fuck out of here.”

“Great minds think alike,” the Jersey cop said. “You guys let us know when you know what you’re doing, and we’ll come back for another, hopefully more fruitful, visit.”

They locked up and left.

—

Ryan gave his car to the doorman at the Four Seasons, and somebody drove it away and did God-knows-what with it. He couldn’t see a garage. He checked in, got two key cards, and sent his bag up to his suite with a bellman and a fifty-dollar bill.

“Unpack for me, will you?”

“Yes, sir,” the young man said, and trotted away.

Ryan found the bar and settled into a booth. He waved the waiter away. “When my lady gets here.”

At the stroke of six o’clock, Sylvia Mays, if that was her name, strolled into the bar, towing a single bag on wheels, and he rose to meet her. She slid into the booth beside him, and the waiter appeared. “What’s your pleasure?” Ryan asked.

“Knob Creek on the rocks,” she said.

“That and a Macallan Twelve,” Ryan said, “and will you ask a bellman to take the lady’s bag up to my suite? Ryan’s the name, I just checked in.”

Booze was served, and he looked her up and down. “Very nice,” he said, “even nicer than before.”

“You’re looking pretty good yourself,” she said.

They chatted for a bit.

“What time is di

“I booked in the restaurant at eight.”

She stroked his thigh. “That gives us an hour and a half, doesn’t it?”

—

They were in the suite and undressed in a flash, and Ryan thought she looked even better naked than clothed. They were pretty quick, then they rested in each other’s arms.

“It’s a very nice suite,” she said. “Thank you.”

“And you are very nice in the sack,” he replied.

She fondled him. “How about a replay?”

“Whatever you say.”

It was a nice evening, so Stone walked up to the Four Seasons for Dino’s event. As he approached the elevator banks he saw a couple walk into a car. They turned and faced the doors as they closed, and Stone caught sight of Gene Ryan, or at least he thought he did. The elevator started up, and before he could see how high it went, Stone was hustled into another elevator by Dino on one arm and Viv on the other.

“I swear I just saw Gene Ryan get onto another elevator,” Stone said.

“It’s what, six-thirty?” Dino asked. “Are you drunk already?” He turned to his wife. “Viv, we’ve got to get Stone to cut down on his drinking. It’s getting out of hand.”

“Extremely amusing,” Stone said as the elevator doors opened and they stepped into a hallway.

“Stone hallucinates when he drinks too much,” Dino said, pushing him toward the end of the hallway.

“Is this a di

“No, it’s a cocktail party,” Viv said, “but we’re having di

“What’s she like?” Stone asked, as they reached the double doors of the suite.

“I’ve no idea,” Viv said. “I haven’t met her.”

“I hear she resembles a camel,” Dino said, ringing the bell.

The door was opened by a uniformed butler, and they stepped into the living room of what Stone thought must be the Presidential Suite, because it was huge. A pianist and a bass player were delivering light jazz in a corner of the room, and waiters in red jackets were circulating among the fifty or so H&H employees and their spouses or significant others. A tall man who had to be Henry Hasker detached from a group and introduced himself, then began introducing them to people, none of whose names Stone caught. Then unexpectedly a six-foot-tall knockout of a woman in a strapless cocktail dress materialized, and Stone caught her name: Hank. In heels, she was as tall as Stone, maybe a little taller.

“How do you do?” Stone asked.

“I do very well, thank you. I’ve heard quite a lot about you. Dino says you’re a terrible drunk.”

“As you get to know Dino better,” Stone said, “you will learn that he is an inveterate liar, especially when I am the subject.”

A waiter appeared with two drinks on a tray. “Knob Creek on the rocks,” he said, and Hank took the other one.

Dino couldn’t help laughing. “What did I tell you, Hank?”