Finding Master Right

Chapter 12

“Get out!” There was the impression of smeared makeup and wild hair before Kate yanked a blanket over her head.

Pixie supplied him with a welcoming doggie grin and rolled onto her back, practically begging for a belly rub. Too bad her mistress was less receptive.

He glanced around the room, which was done in muted colors, but still had enough sparks of personality to suggest she’d decorated for herself rather than for show. A huge print of John Everett Millais’s The Knight Errant kinked it up and was the only piece of art in the room. What was Kate’s attraction to the piece? Being rescued by the knight or being tied up and at his mercy? With the knight in armor and the woman nude, it definitely made Ba

However, it wasn’t time to imagine Kate tied up and at his mercy.

The silence became awkward as he tried to decide what to do. “Why’d you leave like that?” He shuffled his feet. Should he push her for answers or back off? Dominants were expected to be these perfect, in-tune beings, but sometimes he was just as confused, hurt, and clueless as any regular human. “You were gone when I woke up, and you didn’t answer my texts. I even left two voice mails.” Desperate and dorky, of course. Not the smooth words he’d rehearsed on the way over.

He pushed aside the hollow feeling he had in the pit of his stomach. Had he screwed up her aftercare? She’d seemed more than happy when they’d fallen asleep. Why did he get it all wrong when he was with her?

“I needed to get home to clean myself up for work.” Her voice was muffled.

Self-respecting men didn’t converse with blankets.

“So, if you were in such a rush to get to work, why aren’t you there?”

“I’m not feeling well. You need to leave, please.”

Maybe a vanilla guy would respect her request, but he’d done this to her, and he had an obligation to fix it. More than that, he felt desperate and out of control, and he didn’t want to leave without trying to make this right.

Honestly, he’d barged in for himself as much as for Kate.

He’d always considered himself a good man. Now he wasn’t so sure. More than anything, he wanted to train Kate’s body to recognize him as its Master and lead her mind along the path to deeply submit to him. Forcing her to meet his emotional and sexual needs was completely unethical, but the idea of giving her up made him want to break things. How could she make him so crazy without even trying?

He tugged the blanket down and Kate threw an arm over her eyes. The way her face was streaked gnawed at him. This was all his fault. Why couldn’t he just leave her alone?

Aftercare, then he’d walk away, like a gentleman.

Kate drew her arm from her eyes and blinked up at him. “What do you want from me?”

A vision of her kneeling at his feet, gazing up at him with the soft look she got when she was hitting subspace came to mind. That was what he wanted. For her to give in and let things between them sort themselves out. Would twenty-four-seven with him be that bad? He’d been picky in his choices of who to get serious with over the years. It’d figure that he’d finally found the woman he wanted to keep, and she wanted him to fuck off.

“You have to let me take care of you until the feelings you’re having pass. It’s part of my job as a Dominant to help you through this. I think you’re in the middle of sub drop, and that means I can’t just leave. You’re feeling this way because of what we did together, and this is the aftermath crash. It happens to a lot of people. Doms get drop, too, sometimes.” He shrugged and sat on the edge of her bed. It dipped under his weight, which made her roll closer. Before she could scramble back, he put the hot chocolate on her night stand and stretched out beside her. He yanked her into his arms before she could protest too much.

“I don’t need this from you. I just need some time alone,” Kate grumbled, and he ached to kiss her adorable nose. Being in love with her was making him into an idiot.

Shit. This was love, wasn’t it? The feeling made him want to puke.

“I need this. I’m not leaving unless you use your safeword. If you safeword during my cuddling I will judge you.” He frowned menacingly, and she snorted but settled into his arms.

“You’re lucky that dubious-consent cuddling is only on my soft-limit list.”

“Tolerate the love.” It was a phrase he and his buddies used all the time when they were being dicks to one another, but as soon as he’d said it he wished he could take it back. She wouldn’t hear the L word from him again. Not even as a joke.

She didn’t laugh or respond. Did she know how he felt? Had it been obvious to her even before he’d realized it himself?

“So feeling like this is normal?” Kate sniffled and burrowed into his chest.

“Yes, it’s normal. It’ll pass, Trouble.” He buried his face in her hair. The scent of her warmth and shampoo made his chest hurt. Feelings he didn’t want kept crowding in. Watching the other men covet her last night had been torture, even though he’d arranged it.

If I was your Master I would worship you. As my slave you would be my queen.

The tumult of feelings that cascaded through him was raw and rough and far from sane. Crazy, creepy thoughts crept in, urging him to steal her away somewhere remote, where he’d keep her until she understood.

Understood what? That he was more evil than he let on?

God, he was losing it.

He stroked the silent tears from her cheeks and held her until he thought he’d die. This was the kind of obsession that landed men in jail.

Ambrose would fix this.

Ambrose had to take her away from him, before it was too late.

***

Ba

“Fuck, man. You need to blow off some steam before you snap.” Ambrose set a beer down on a table near him and backed away, as though he was a bomb in danger of going off.

Ba

“There’s no other way. You have to take her, Ambrose. No one else is good enough, except Konstantin, and by the time he comes back it’ll be too late.” He ran a hand through his hair, not caring if it was sticking up at odd angles.

He let his gaze wander to the newest addition to the grounds, the manmade waterfall that poured into a lagoonlike pool. It was completely ostentatious and made Ambrose’s backyard look as though he were expecting a school of mermaids to come hang out. He was case in point that money couldn’t buy taste. The setup was pretty enough, but if Ambrose ever settled down with a woman, she’d probably have a hell of a time trying to make the place look classy.

That woman might be Kate, soon enough.

“Quit ranting. I said okay. I’ll meet her and try to date her, then the two of us can just pretend you don’t want to kill me every time I hold her hand. But think . . . What if I fall in love with her and we get married and have kids? Are you going to stand in the wedding and smile at the baptism and promise to be the godfather while you not so secretly want to kill me? This will seriously fuck up our friendship.”