Sunburst

White and blinding, pain flashed through me. This was not him. This was not Seth. I pushed my self-doubt and raw sensitivity down, deep, deep down and pretended I had as much attitude as he did. “Now you’re just being petty. I had no idea you were so insecure.” He growled out an animalistic sound and I knew I hit a nerve, but something dark and punishing pushed me further. “Had I known you were lying to me all this time, I would have just lied back. I could have easily saved your poor ego, if I knew that was the game we were playing.”

“I never lied to you,” he shouted. “I was nothing but honest- too honest. I laid my soul bare for you, and you spit on it! You were created for me, not even given a choice to love someone else and you still couldn’t admit that you had a future with me! And now everything has been taken away from me and still I ache for you. It’s the cruelest kind of purgatory.” His last words were grated out in a harsh whisper and the throbbing in my chest intensified to beyond what I could handle.

“So that’s it? Kill me? Remove the problem? And then what?” I challenged. We had walked beyond the main battle, off to the side of the crowd, to our very own stretch of perfect beach. “You’ll have peace? You sold your soul to the most sadistic creature in the universe! There is no peace for you. Kill me if you have to, but you suffer forever at your own hands. I had nothing to do with this decision.”

“You had everything to do with this decision!” He was screaming now in a raging voice that echoed over every other sound. Spittle flew from his lips, his face was suffused with bright red blood.

And then he attacked. His swords swung with superhuman speed and I only caught them with my own by sheer luck. I had been determined to not just defend myself but fight back too.

In reality, under the power and skill of Seth’s swords, there was no chance that I could actually fight back against this guy. He was insane with speed, strength and ability.

And I was just me.

Inadequate, lacking and half his size.

But I still kept my arms moving, my wrists loose and my focus intently on his body. I met him blow for blow. Sweat poured from my forehead, my Light was intensifying with each second and the sand underfoot became so hot it started to melt the rubber soles of my shoes.

Seth swung one blade toward my side, while the other raised above my head and sliced from the opposite direction. Just managing to move fast enough, I twirled out of the way, spi

As soon as I landed, Seth was there, dealing more punishing blows that jarred my bones and vibrated through my body. One of his blades caught my bicep and sliced it open before I could pull back. Another got my thigh, cutting through the loose material of my yoga pants with ease.

I vaguely noted I was going to have to switch over to leather like my mom and Serena. Suddenly I understood the benefit of looking like Cat Woman.

When he nicked my neck with the tip of his sword and I felt blood drip over my collarbone, I had about had it.

“Enough!” I screamed. “Are you really going to kill me?” I was just as angry as he could ever be and even while I threw my swords up to block his next blow, I waited for an answer.

“I have to,” he spat out in a voice so low and growly, I could barely make it out. “I have to end this.”

“End what?” I gasped, struggling under his brute strength.

“The constant pain,” he whispered as if the words actually hurt him. He pressed forward and I collapsed under his power. He was down on top of me in another moment, before I had the chance to move, to roll, to do anything but surrender to his ruthless attack.

He straddled my waist, pi

Our blades were cut and sharpened so that cutting through bone and flesh was as easy as slicing soft butter. If I even breathed heavily his sword would sink deeper into my skin.

I didn’t expect him to, but he was hesitating. It probably shouldn’t have, but his pause gave me hope. In the depth of eyes so crazed and confused, I could have sworn I saw some kind of recognition.

“Seth,” I whispered, losing the tough-girl act and reaching desperately for the love that still infused every molecule in my body. “I love you.”

He winced and closed his eyes as if in real pain. His sword never left my throat but I felt his resolve stutter.

“I do love you,” I promised. “Only you.”

“You don’t love me,” he grated. “You would never tell me that now, if you did. You would know better.”

“I told you before, in the forest. Remember?” His eyebrows fused together and he just looked at me. I shook my head, and the sword bit into my neck deeper. “And I have to tell you now. If this is my last chance, I have to tell you.”

Confusion laced with guilt flashed in his expression. Even like this, even distorted by the torturous existence he was suffering and raging with a hate he didn’t understand, he was beautiful. Perfect. Lost. I ached for him in ways that had nothing to do with fear or resentment. My entire body cried out to him, pleaded with him to stop this. And surprisingly my desperate need for him not to kill me had nothing to do with my life, or my desire to stay alive. But everything to do with Seth and his soul that still hung in the balance.

Killing me would destroy him. One day he would have the opportunity to get his soul back, to come back to himself. He couldn’t do that if he blackened and demolished it in the meantime. I had to live so that he could. I had to survive so he could.

He would never forgive himself for this.

He would never recover.

“And Tristan?” he flinched. “I saw you with him. I saw you tonight.”

In Tristan’s truck? Could he have really seen that?

Tears leaked from my eyes now, steady streams of emotion I couldn’t control. “That was goodbye,” I swore. “I was saying goodbye to Tristan.”

He cocked his head back and pushed the blade deeper into my skin. I choked on it, tasting the metal of blood in my mouth as it coated my tongue. “You’re lying. You’re always lying!” He was shouting again and applying crushing, life-taking pressure on his blade.

I mouthed no, but he was back to being evil again- back to crazy. I closed my eyes against that deranged image of him. If this was my last moment of life I didn’t want to remember him this way. I wanted to picture him as the beautiful boy I knew and loved; the one filled with Light. I remembered his easy going attitude; the strength and power that rippled through him even while he was still. I wanted to remember the mischievous boy that stole my chocolate chip pancakes; the boy that danced gently with me at the Valentine’s dance while my body was still recovering from my first real battle with the Fallen; the boy that curled up with me when his nightmares became too much; the boy that stole my heart and demanded I fall in love with him, not because it was our destiny but because he was the perfect answer to me- my perfect Counterpart.

I opened my mouth to tell him I loved him one more time, but blood ran out of my mouth instead and I was suddenly without the ability to move my mouth. This was it.

Something wet hit my cheek and rolled into my ear. Some distant thought wondered if it was a tear- his tear- but then he was gone and my world was thrust into confusion.

Chapter Twenty-Six

My head fell to the side, while my body frantically tried to heal the damage inflicted on my throat. I was losing a lot of blood and I couldn’t seem to move my arms or legs. My hands had stopped gripping my swords, so they lay idly in my open palms.