On Dublin Street

“Well, sometimes untrustworthy, cold bitches keep their word,” I answered stiffly, taking a sip of my juice.

Braden grunted and slammed his mug down on the counter. “She doesn’t need your charity or your fucking guilt.”

Fuck.

Shit, fuckity, shit, fuck.

Clearly Braden had taken the night to let his anger simmer and boil over. I braced myself, trying to be understanding and not hurt him any more than I already had. “She doesn’t have my charity or my guilt.”

“Oh so I was right last night then.” Braden nodded. “Unlike me, she has your love.”

“Braden…” I choked out. I’d expected him to be like he always was. Braden was stoic, intimidating, immoveable and cool. Not vulnerable and bitter and angry. Basically a dick at a really inappropriate time. Then again, I’d dumped him hours after he learned his little sister might have cancer so, who was the bigger dick? “You don’t love me either, Braden.”

His eyes flashed at that before casting down my body and back up again, in a cold perusal that sent horrible shivers through me. His gaze came back up to mine and it was pale as ice. “You’re right. I don’t love you. I’m just a

I’d say I was a pretty good actor, but any more of his verbal assault and I was going to crumble under the pain. I turned away quickly, so he wouldn’t see what his words did to me. “I’d hoped that we could still be friends, but clearly you don’t want that. So can we just agree to not talk to one another unless we have to for Ellie’s sake?”

“If it were up to me, for Ellie’s sake, I’d kick your arse out and tell you never to darken our doorstep again. But Ellie doesn’t need that right now.”

Shock drew my head up and I gazed at him incredulously. “Are you kidding?”

He crossed his powerful arms over his chest and shook his head. “No. I can’t trust you. You’re fucked up. I don’t think Ellie needs that.”

“Last night you wanted me here for Ellie.”

“I’ve had time to think about it. If I could, I’d get rid of you. But that would just cause Ellie more pain. She doesn’t need that right now.”

“You could do that?” I was almost wheezing. “Just throw me out of your life?”

“Why not? You did it to me last night.”

“No. I broke up with you. I didn’t throw you out of my life.” I glared at him. “But if I had known how little I really did mean to you, I probably should have.”

Oh.” Braden nodded. “That’s right. You don’t love me, but you care about me.” He shrugged. “Well I could give a shit about you.”

I locked my jaw, trying so hard to hold in the tears.

“As a matter of fact, I fucked someone else last night.”

You ever had a shotgun bullet blast through your stomach? No? Me neither. But I have a feeling what I felt when Braden said that would be similar to being blasted by a shotgun. And really, not even the best actress in the world can mask that kind of pain.

I physically flinched at his words, my body jerking back, my knees almost giving out, my eyes wide, and my mouth open in horror. And then the worst happened. I began to cry.

Through my tears I saw Braden’s lips pinch together and he took two steps towards me, his whole body bristling. “I fucking knew it,” he hissed, still coming toward me.

“Don’t touch me!” I yelled, not able to bear the thought of him near me now.

“Don’t touch you?” He snarled, his eyes sparking violently. “I’m going to kill you!”

“Me?” I turned around and grabbed a plate off the dish rack and spun around, letting it fly at his head. He ducked and it smashed against the wall. “I’m not the one that fucked someone two seconds after we broke up!”

I reached for a glass to throw, but Braden was on me, his strong hands pi

“Ssh. Ssh, Jocelyn,” he soothed, bending his head into my neck. “Ssh, don’t say that,” he begged against my skin. “Don’t say that. I didn’t mean it. I lied. I was angry. I’m a fucking idiot. I lied. I was with Elodie all night. You can call her and ask, but she’ll tell you the truth. You know I would never do to you what was done to me.”

His words penetrated my hysteria and I stopped struggling. And started trembling. “What?”

Braden pulled back to give me a pair of pale blue and very sincere eyes. “I lied. I wasn’t with anyone else. There hasn’t been anyone else since we got together.”

My nose was all choked up from crying so much, so I sounded like a five-year old when I murmured, “I don’t understand.”

“Babe,” his voice rumbled, the tenderness back, although I could still see the a

Heart pounding, fear clawing at my throat, I tried to swallow it down. “So what the hell was this morning?”

He squeezed my nape and bent his head closer to mine, his eyes definitely still dark with anger. “You’re not untrustworthy, you’re not cold and you’re not a bitch. You have… issues. I get that. We all have issues. But once I realized you were lying to me, I began to understand why. You think you never gave yourself away with me. You think you have time to backpedal and pretend nothing happened between us, because that way if anything ever happens to me, you can tell yourself you don’t care, and you don’t feel the pain.”

Oh my God, he was a goddamn psychic now.

“You’re also bloody good at pretending you don’t feel anything. I thought if I could hurt you this morning, I might get the proof I needed that you were lying.”

I pi

He nodded gently and brushed an apologetic kiss across my lips. “Sorry, babe. I did it to get to the truth… but if I’m honest I did it to hurt you the way you hurt me last night.” His eyes filled with remorse. “I’m really sorry. I never want to put that look on your face again, or ever make you cry again, I swear. But the truth is, you did cry. You cried because the thought of me doing that to you ripped you apart. You love me.”

I tried to gather my thoughts, my panic sending them scattering. There was too much to deal with, too much to discuss, and it all had to be later because Ellie needed us. “One: that was the shittiest thing in the world to do. Two: we can’t do this right now.”

“We’re not leaving this kitchen until you admit you love me.”

“Braden, I mean it.” I pushed at him sternly and he let me go, although he didn’t step back. “I’m still broken up with you. I’m not changing my mind.”

His eyes looked to the heavens and I watched him wrestle with his patience. Finally his gaze cut back to me and I could see the muscle in his jaw twitching. “Why not?” He bit out.

I wouldn’t explain it to him. He’d just find some way to argue around it and I just… no! “Because I just won’t. Now, we have a long day in front of us and a possibly even longer few months, so just… let it go.”