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Elle tightened her grip around Bravo’s collar.
Tell me this isn’t happening, Elle thought.
“Jay!” Elle stood up. “You will not do this to me!”
He kept walking. Georgia cast a guilty glance at Elle, but she didn’t stop walking. Anger rushed through Elle’s veins.
How dare they do this. After everything.
Elle got to her feet and sprinted across the open space between her and Jay. She slammed into him from behind and they fell to the ground in a tumbled heap. Elle jammed the heel of her shoe into his chin. Jay swore and grabbed Elle’s arm, twisting it backward. Elle cried out and sunk her teeth into his hand, biting as hard as she could. She tasted blood. Jay screamed and let go. Elle rolled to her feet and kicked him.
“After everything we’ve done for you,” Elle yelled, “you’re going to steal my stuff and leave me behind to die? Is that your brilliant plan, Jay?” She kicked him again. He grabbed her foot, slammed her against the ground.
“STOP IT!” Georgia begged. “PLEASE!”
Elle ignored her, her head spi
“Please don’t do this!” Georgia begged, tears ru
Elle tuned her out. This wasn’t about doing what was right anymore. This was about survival. Bravo was watching the whole thing from the sidelines, his ears pricking forward. He paced, barking loudly.
He hardly ever barked.
Elle rolled to the side, avoiding another heavy blow from Jay. She tried to stand up but Jay grabbed her ankles and pulled her back down. Her face slapped the rocky soil and she saw stars.
Don’t hold back because he’s your friend, a little voice said. He’s trying to kill you. You need to defend yourself.
Elle’s natural survival instincts were coming out. Hadn’t she known from the begi
And this is how they thanked her.
Trust nobody, Elle thought. It’s me against the world.
Jay nailed Elle, pi
Her hands shook.
“Bravo,” Elle said. Her voice was low but firm. Bravo released Jay’s arm and circled him, growling and flashing his teeth. Tears of pain ran down Jay’s face. Blood ran down his arm, pooling in the dirt. “Take off the backpack,” Elle commanded. “Now.”
Jay slowly slid his arms out of the straps and kicked the backpack toward Elle. She knelt down and slung one strap over her shoulder, still aching with pain and burning with adrenaline and anger.
“Let’s get one thing straight, city boy,” Elle said. “I’m in charge. I make the rules, and I decide how we ration the food. You lost the right to vote in this little democracy when you tried to break my arm about five seconds ago.” She took a step closer. “And if you try anything again, I’ll kill you.” She glanced at Bravo. “And if I don’t kill you, the dog will.”
She looked at Georgia.
“I don’t think Jay was thinking straight—” the girl started to say.
“None of us are thinking straight,” Elle replied. “It’s no excuse.”
Georgia hung her head.
“Do you understand what I’m saying, tough guy?” Elle demanded.
Jay nodded weakly, blood dribbling down his chin.
“It’s hard to believe you survived on the streets with fighting skills like that,” Elle muttered.
“I’ve killed before,” Jay said.
“We’ve all killed someone since Day Zero,” Elle replied.
“No. I killed before.” Tears slipped down his cheeks. “The reason why I was in juvie, Elle. It’s because I killed two people.”
Elle tightened the grip on the gun.
“You were in jail because you were a murderer?” Elle said, swallowing. “You never said anything about that.”
“I didn’t tell you because I knew you would make a judgment.” Jay buried his face in his trembling hands. “Everyone assumes that I killed people because I was a bad person. Because I was on the streets. Because I looked like a killer.”
“Were you a killer, Jay?” Elle asked, lowering her voice.
“I didn’t mean to be,” he whispered.
Elle didn’t move. She kept the gun where it was. She kept her eye on Georgia and Flash. Bravo continued to growl just enough to remind everyone that he was willing to take out a chunk of anyone’s arm if they made a move.
“There were three guys,” Jay said. “My parents… they owned a liquor shop. One night, three punks came in and tried to rob the cash box under the counter. I was working the late-night shift. They had guns. I didn’t.” He shook his head. “We fought. I got my hands on one gun. I killed two of them with it. The third guy got away.”
Elle said nothing.
Jay exhaled. “I didn’t mean to kill them,” he said. “But they were trying to kill me. They were trying to take my family’s money. It was all we had. It was everything.”
The wind kicked up again, whistling across the plain, blowing Elle’s hair back.
“You’re not a murderer, Jay,” Elle replied. “You did what you had to do to keep your family safe.” She lowered the muzzle of the gun. “You’ve got to do the same thing now. We can’t survive and we can’t protect each other if we’re fighting like this. We’ve got to stick together. And you’ve got to do what I say.” She slipped the gun into her jacket. “Do you understand?”
Nothing.
Then:
“Yeah. I get it.” Jay looked up at Elle, his face tear-stained. “I’m sorry.”
Elle shook her head.
“Get up and clean that bite,” she commanded. “Georgia? You take care of that. We’re wasting time.”
She turned away, aware of the heavy ache in her bones and the taste of blood in her mouth. She locked eyes with Georgia. The blond girl’s air of drama and sarcasm was gone. She looked very small; very frightened. Beside her, Flash shifted from foot to foot, counting under his breath.
Elle placed a hand on Flash’s shoulder.
“Are you okay, kid?” she asked.
Flash looked up at her, his eyes red and bloodshot.
“We’re going to die, aren’t we?” he said.
“Yeah,” Elle replied, gri
“So why do we care so much about survival now? If we’re all going to die… why do we try to stay alive?”
Elle patted his back.
“Because it’s what we do,” she said. “We survive.”
She looked to the desert.
We survive so that we can die in peace.
Chapter Ten
It started as a hum. It was faint, only a distant sound. And then it got louder, and Elle popped awake. Bravo was sitting straight up, his ears pricked forward.
“What is it, boy?” she whispered.
It was early morning. The sun had just started to rise above the distant mountains, filtering through the grainy air of the dusty desert. The hum turned into a small rumble. Elle stayed close to the ground. In the Mojave, they might be able to escape unseen if they stayed on their bellies, close to the ground and out of sight. There were shrubs and trails and a myriad of uneven surfaces to hide behind.