Becoming His

“Paul’s coming tonight.”

“What? Why?”

“I don’t know! Je

“I hope not,” I grumble.

“I know, right?”

“Who are you ladies shit talking?” I look up to see Jameson approaching us with one of his quick smiles. He places a kiss to Kendall’s temple before dropping into a chair beside us.

“We’re not shit talking.” Kendall growls, glaring at him. “Paul’s coming over for di

“He is kind of an asswipe,” Jameson admits, bouncing his knee because he never sits still for any length of time. “That’s tough though, I mean…” he looks at us cautiously “…isn’t it better that he’s around being Lilly’s dad and all?”

Kendall looks at me briefly and then shakes her head. “He’s not Lilly’s dad. Her dad’s never been in the picture. He was home from college and …” Kendall’s eyes grow as she moves her hands in a rolling motion, resembling patty cake, that makes me smirk. “Yeah, Lilly arrived nine months later. It was a mess. They had to go through paternal testing and then his parents threatened a custody battle. Thankfully that never became an issue, likely because their dickhead of a son never showed any interest in Lilly, but they ended up turning out pretty great. They’re good to Lilly and Je

The rich aroma of basil, thyme, and Italian sausage fills the house when the family begins arriving.

“Mmmm, spaghetti, my favorite!” Sava

Paul comes in behind them, not even bothering to knock with a cocky grin covering his face. I watch as Caulder silently sneers at him, obviously under strict instruction not to voice his apparent thoughts.

“Hi, family!” Paul greets jovially, earning him an eye roll from both Kendall and Caulder as we quietly murmur responses.

I look up to see my parents coming in the kitchen as the doorbell rings. I hear Sharon’s voice and grin with the knowledge that Max has arrived.

“So, Ace, did you miss me?” Paul leans on the kitchen bar.

I turn my attention away from the doorway leading to the foyer in the anticipation of seeing Max.

“Probably about as much as someone misses a hemorrhoid,” Kyle answers, clasping him on his shoulder before stepping in the kitchen to stand beside me.

Paul scoffs and the tension has me reeling to devise a plan to calm everyone down. Emily, Jade, and Lilly, who are always a pretty safe bet for a distraction, once again prove their weight in gold as they run through the kitchen squealing with excitement, dressed in princess attire with Zeus trailing behind them, a cape tied around his collar.

“Certainly can’t say we’re boring,” Kyle says quietly, leaning against the drawers and drinking his beer as I return to finishing di

With everyone here tonight we have a full house of sixteen flooding the kitchen and entryway with bodies and voices. My eyes sift through them until they land on Max, and I feel my lips turn up in a smile as I release my ladle and make my way over to him. I wrap my arms around his chest, hugging him tightly.

We jump back in alarm as Mindi shrieks, and I follow her horrified expression and see bright flashes and smoke emitting from the microwave.

Kyle, still standing beside the oven, quickly reaches over and turns it off, ending the bright flashes. We all silently stare at it for a moment to see if it’s really done and a loud boom pops from the inside, making both my mom and Kendall scream.

“What’s in there?” my mom asks, looking directly at me.

“I didn’t do it,” I say, shaking my head.

“I spilled on some papers and thought it would dry them off …” Sava

I mash my lips together to try and keep the hysterics surfacing inside. Kendall doesn’t even attempt to stop it. She bursts out laughing.

“Microwaves should really amend their warning label to add that Bosse women aren’t allowed to operate them,” Dad says, shaking his head, causing a chorus of laughter.

“Ace’s was the worst. Do you remember how awful it smelled?” Je

“That’s right, the brownies!” Mom says, laughing even harder. “Ace put a metal tin in the microwave with brownie mix for twenty minutes,” she explains to the few that don’t already know the story. “I think it only made it to six or seven before it was on fire.”

“I thought you were good at science,” Jameson teases.

“I was like five and that was my one and only microwave incident. Personally, I think the time that Sava

“Babe, tell me you didn’t?” Caulder pleads, shaking his head with a laugh.

“No, the worst smelling incident was the fish that my queen of the kitchen accidentally added an extra zero to when attempting to thaw a whole fish. Never mind the fact that you should never thaw a fish in the microwave to begin with, but the fish exploded and it was by far the most disgusting and smelly microwave story yet.”

“Why do you keep getting new ones, Dad?” Je

“Because it hides all of the scorch marks on the wall.” This makes us laugh even harder.

We continue to distribute jokes as mom works to usher everyone into the dining room. My mom had made a big fuss a few years ago about how there wasn’t enough space to fit everyone at our dining room table, bringing on a large renovation that took months to expand the dining room to fit a table that is quite literally the size of a boat.

The table causes a myriad of jokes about how difficult it is to hear someone sitting further down the table. Kyle and my dad are the worst offenders of the ensuing jokes, which generally leads to Mom getting a

“I think we should really consider doing spaghetti once a month,” Kyle says, patting his flat abs after finishing his second helping of spaghetti. “Seriously, you could bottle this stuff, Ace. Forget worrying about declaring a major.”

I grin at him as the conversation flows easily with everyone laughing, still reminiscing on microwave stories that have plagued our family.

“So, Sava

I look up and see Paul touching his own cheeks. My eyes grow round with alarm, and I cringe in anticipation of the retaliation sure to come. Jameson pounds his chest and reaches for his water glass as he coughs. Caulder sits beside him, looking ready to kill Paul with his fork that he holds like a dagger.

With no surprise, Mindi’s the first to start yelling. Sava

After a few moments of horrifying awkwardness for our guests as threats and insults are launched at Paul, Dad taps his water glass and stands up.

“Alright, well I think we can safely say that remark came out wrong. Very wrong,” he says, looking pointedly at Paul. “Sava

The mood has turned sour though, filled with tension as people begin carrying their dishes into the kitchen. “I won’t be offended if you want to go home. Hell, I’ll go with you,” I whisper. Max smiles and shakes his head as we make our way to the kitchen.