Добавить в цитаты Настройки чтения

Страница 15 из 89

anything!” He stands up, paces the room. “You just lock

yourself away in your own little world and try to deal with

everything by yourself. That’s why we broke up—because

you couldn’t tell me, wouldn’t tell me, what was wrong!”

stare at him, my cheeks burning, my eyes hot.

look away.

“I could’ve handled it, Rosie—I could’ve helped—I

could help now, if you’d let me.”

close my eyes.

He sighs. “I know it must be difficult—I know it’s

lot to take in …”

“It’s not,” mutter.

“Of course it is.”

“It’s not

lot to take in, all right?” glare at him.

“Because I—I already knew.”

Andy frowns. “What do you mean?”

look away.

“I don’t understand, Rose,” he says slowly. “I

thought Huntington’s was hereditary?”

“Exactly! Exactly, it’s hereditary!”

He looks at me for moment, then shakes his head.

“You’ve lost me.”

“It’s hereditary!” look at him, the pain prickling my

eyes. “But you can’t inherit disease from someone who’s

not related to you—who isn’t even your mother!”

83

He stares at me.

“She wasn’t my mother, Andy—she wasn’t …” trail

off, close my eyes, my throat swelling painfully.

There’s long silence. Then he takes deep breath

and reaches over, his hand warm and soft on mine.

“Okay,” he says gently. “I think it’s time to spill,

don’t you?”

“Wow.” Andy sighs after I’ve told him everything.

“Wow.”

“Yeah.” It feels good to finally let it all out.

feel

lighter. But exhausted.

“And Trudie never knew?”

shake my head.

“Wow, Rose.

mean, God,

don’t know what to

say …” He sighs. “How do you deal with something like—

Have you told your nana?”

shake my head. “I can’t, Andy. I’m all she’s got

left—of Granddad, of Mum—how can possibly tell her

that it was all one big lie, all these years? That her real

granddaughter died the day she was born? It would break

her heart.” swallow, the pain in my chest swelling. “It’s

broken mine.”

“Rosie, it’s okay.”

“No. No, it’s not. You don’t know what it’s like, Andy.

I’m stuck here, trapped in this life that’s not even mine

with

grandmother

have to lie to, no friends, no

qualifications, no life—there’s nothing left!” My voice cracks. “It’s all right for you, you’re buggering off around

the world—you can escape!”

84

“Then come with me.”

“Yeah, right.”

“I’m serious—why not? You said it yourself, what’s

keeping you here?” He looks at me. “We always wanted to

travel, didn’t we? This is our second chance!”

hesitate, and he squeezes my hand, his eyes

softening. “Come with me, Rose. It wasn’t the same

without you—I missed you the whole time. This was our

dream, after all. We pla

stupid misunderstanding—so let’s

go now!”

look at him, the idea dancing enticingly in my

mind—to just fly away with Andy, leave everything

behind, pick up where we left off, but

it’s too much, too

sudden.

“No strings,” he promises, reading my doubts. “I’ve

missed you, Rosie. I’ve missed you—just being with

you

hanging out, educating your taste in music.” He

grins, those dimples making me falter. “Come on, Rose. It’s

just what you need, it’ll take your mind off everything.”

“It will not!”

He looks up at the anger in my voice.

“You have no idea, do you? You think dashing off

around the world will make me forget that my mother’s

dead? That she wasn’t actually my mother?” look at him.

“How could ever come back, Andy? To this mess of—of

lies and deceit and, and …”

trail off and look out the

window, but all can see is my tearstained reflection and

the dark clouds beyond. “It’s such

mess, it’s all such





85

mess, and just

There’s nothing left, Andy. None of it’s

real …” close my eyes.

He sighs, rubs his brow.

“So, what now?”

shrug. “I du

We sit in silence for moment.

“Actually,

do,”

say eventually, taking

deep

breath. “I’m going to find her.”

“Who?”

swallow hard. “My real mother.”

“Hello? Mr. Woods? Hi!” cross my fingers tightly.

“Hi, I’m friend of Holly’s, and—Sorry? Holly Woods? She

doesn’t?” My heart sinks. “Sorry to bother you. Bye.”

sigh heavily, dropping the receiver into its cradle

and my head into my hands. There were thirty-five

Woodses in the phone book. That was the last one.

“Tell me you’ve had better luck with the birth

records?”

Andy shakes his head at the computer screen.

’Fraid not. According to this birth records site, no

seventeen-year-old Holly Woods even existed in the year

you were born.”

“What?” look up. “That’s impossible! Maybe Sarah

guessed her age wrong. Try the years either side.”

“I have,” Andy sighs. “I’ve tried five years either

side. No Holly Woods.”

“None at all?”

He shakes his head.

86

“I don’t understand.”

frown. “That’s impossible.

We know she was here—she was seventeen, she ran

away, she had baby …”

drop the phone book and pick up my jacket. “Come

on.”

Andy stares at me. “Where are we going?”

“To the one place we know she has been.”

The snow has all but melted as we drive into town,

mounds that were once snowmen glinting in the fields and

gardens as the afternoon sun struggles through the

clouds.

“All set?” Andy asks as we pull into the car-park.

take deep breath and hug my clipboard. “All set.”

He squeezes my shoulder, and we head into the

small country hospital, the stench of disinfectant stinging

my nose as we follow the signs down the lino-lined

corridor to ward painted in pastel colors.

Maternity

Little goose bumps break out down my back. This is

it. This is where it all happened. Thank God Sarah’s got

this week off, so there’s no chance of bumping into her.

“Can

help you?”

cheerful-looking nurse

approaches us.

force

bright smile and clear my throat. “Hello,

we’re students at Maybridge Sixth Form College, and

we’re doing project on the day we were born.” My tone

is professional, polite, as recite the rehearsed lines we

devised in the car.

“I see.” She smiles. “How can help you?”

87

“Well,

was born here,”

say confidently. “And

was just wondering if you could tell me how many …” My

eyes flick to her name-badge. Jamila Price “How many …”

Jamila … “How …”

She raises her eyebrows.

“How many other babies were born on the same

days we were,” Andy finishes for me. “And any

information you can give us about them.”

“I’m sorry.” Jamila smiles apologetically. “We can’t

give out that information. Patient confidentiality, you

know.”

“Of course,” Andy says. “Thanks anyway.”

“What about you?” ask desperately as she turns

away. “Maybe could just ask you some questions. Have

you ever had to deal with mothers ru

abandoning their child?”

She stares at me. “I’m sorry—I’m afraid can’t help

you.”

“Come on, Rose,” Andy says quickly. “Let’s go.”

“But—what about teenagers with unwanted

babies? Adoption?”

“I’m sorry.” She turns away.