Perfectly Damaged

“Well, she sure knows how to hit a soft spot.”

“Who’s Eric?” I ask, my breath still a bit raspy from jogging.

Je

“Who is he?” I ask again.

She squares her shoulders defensively.

“Jersey Girl.” I grip her shoulder. “I’m not your enemy. You can talk to me.”

Je

“He was someone I thought loved me.”

“An ex-boyfriend?”

“Yeah.”

I nod. “I see.”

“He was my first.”

“First?” I raise a brow. “As in first guy you ever slept with?”

She turns her head, eyes glistening. “Yeah, that too. But he was also the first guy I fell in love with, the first guy I ever trusted, and the first guy who broke my heart.”

“What happened between the two of you?”

Jersey Girl turns her head away, her gaze skimming over the lake. She breathes in one deep breath, and then lets out a sigh, her shoulders deflating in the process. “I got sick.”

“Sick?”

“Yeah, sick. There was a time where I was at my lowest point in my life. Well, at the time I thought it was my lowest—”

“Like, the flu sick?” I interrupt.

She brings her eyes back to me. “Just sick, Logan. The point that I’m trying to make is that Eric couldn’t handle it and he left me. It was heartbreaking because it was when I needed him the most and he walked away from it all.”

What kind of bastard does that to someone he claims to care for? “Do you know where he lives now?” I ask.

Her brows draw in. “No. Why?”

“So I can go kick his ass.” I shrug at her wide-eyed expression. “I mean it’s an instant reaction. Do you have a last name? Social security number?”

She laughs.

There it is—her smile. I grin along with her, but I’m dead serious about hunting down this Eric guy. I put those thoughts aside and pull her into me. She nestles into my chest.

We stand there for a while before she pulls away and looks up. “So, there were a couple pretty girls at the party tonight.”

I smile. She’s talking about two girls that showed up. Jersey Girl caught Santino staring at them and overheard him tell me he thought they were hot. “Yeah, there were.”

She looks down, lightly tapping her sneaks into the edge of my boots. “Well, maybe you should ask one of them out sometime,” she says softly.

“Maybe,” I say. But they’re not you. That’s what I really want to say.

“So,” I say. “What’s going on with you and Matthew? Are you guys a couple or something?” I ask.

She snorts. “Hell no. I told him I’d prefer to be friends. We have nothing in common.”

You sure have a bad habit of putting guys in the friend zone, Jersey Girl. I make sure to keep that remark to myself.

Je

Jesus Christ, Je

Je

Fuck. Did I actually just admit that to myself?

Yes, I did. Because it’s all true. I’m falling for her.

Je

Maybe if I just tell her, maybe she feels the same.

But she’s made it very clear we should remain friends. If I tell her, she’ll just pull away. Do I risk our friendship over these feelings I have—feelings I’m not sure I can control any longer?

I know she feels it. She has to; there’s no way I’m feeling every bit of this on my own, it’s that damn powerful. Whatever is going on between us is definitely more.

I want to give her more of me, show her what I’m capable of. But I’m not even sure what the hell I’m capable of.

This is fucking frustrating.

“Are you okay?” Je

“No. I’m fine.” I take a step back, making sure to keep my eyes away from her. I can’t bear to look at her with my thoughts racing like this.

“Logan?” she questions cautiously.

“Je

“Okay,” she stammers, shocked by my outburst.

Shit, I’m even surprised by how I’m acting.

“I’m sorry.” Although it’s an apology, my tone is still rough. “I need to… I’ll be back. I just need to leave for a minute. I’ll be back.” I walk away.

I need to clear my fucking head.

chapter 21

Je

“Earth to Je

“Yes?” I ask, but continue to stare out my bedroom window.

“Here I am trying to tell you how my vacation went and you’re ignoring me.” She huffs.

It’s Monday morning and I’m waiting for Logan to arrive for his work shift. He hasn’t responded to any of my text messages or phone calls this entire weekend. It’s as if he’s dropped off the face of the earth. Thursday night he seemed off. The way he walked away from me, and then when he returned, he said things came up and he needed to go.

After I questioned his behavior, he assured me things were fine. But I knew they weren’t. He didn’t look at me at all, and he kept his distance in the car when he drove me all the way home. When I asked him questions or tried to lighten the mood, his responses were short and curt even.

I don’t understand what I did wrong.

I thought maybe something bad had happened until Charlie stopped by and slept over last night, telling me all about her weekend at the lake house. She went straight there when she got back from vacation with her family, expecting to find me there. She mentioned how much fun the party this weekend was and how everyone—except me, of course—was there.

I questioned her about Logan, making sure to be discreet, to not sound like a pathetic stalker. She informed me he was, in fact, at the lake house this entire weekend. And not only was he present, but he was having the time of his life! She didn’t use those exact words, but that’s how I took it.

I’m furious. Here I am, worried sick that something might’ve happened to him, while he’s busy having the time of his life.

Charlie keeps going on and on, but I can’t hear a single word she says. My ears are blowing steam with the tick of each second that goes by as I wait for Logan to arrive.

And then, there he is.

He’s laughing and smiling with Santino as they walk across the lawn toward the site of the guesthouse. More laughter. What’s so damn fu