That Wedding

He ignores me, as usual, when there's only one thing on his mind. Finally, thankfully, a few seconds later, he kisses my hip and says, "Got it!" I feel the key slide out from the side of my underwear.

He gets up fast, unlocks the door, sweeps me off my feet, and carries me across the threshold of our honeymoon suite.

His eyes look even darker.

He shuts the door and gets right down to business. And that business is not taking off my dress as pla

He kisses my exposed shoulders, my neck, my lips. Then he looks at the back of my dress like it's a difficult golf putt. Like how they get down and look at it from all different angles. "There isn't a zipper."

"No, Phillip, you have to unbutton every single button."

"Damn." He looks some more.

"I can get Lori to come up and do it."

"Oh, no, you're not. I got this."

He stands behind me, concentrating on the buttons. And the fu

"Phillip, you're like doing it backwards."

"No, I'm getting the right effect. Just you wait." He undoes all the buttons except for the very top one. Then he stands in front of me. He wraps his arms around me, unbuttons the final button, stands back a little, and lets it go.

My dress slowly slides down off of me, and I'm now wearing nothing but a something blue thong.

Phillip lets out a heavy breath and says, "God, you take my breath away."

In one quick motion, he puts his hand around my waist, lifts me up out of the frothy fabric pile, and pins me on the bed.

He kisses me deeply then pulls off his shirt and pants. He never breaks eye contact with me.

I seriously have no idea when he even took off his jacket.

Okay, I have to say this, and then I'm going to tell him, Uh, no.

My husband is so freaking sexy!!!

He's not the only one that can't breathe.

I read somewhere in the millions of wedding articles and websites that you should take time for a few private moments on your wedding day, and I guess this would be considered a private moment.

But still, we pla

"Phillip, we can't do this now. It's our wedding night. We discussed this. Remember? Come up after the reception, take a warm bubble bath, drink champagne, relax, and then, you know."

"You changed the plans when you changed the dress."

"Phillip, I don't wa

"No problem, Mrs. Mackenzie," he says as he pulls the last scrap of lace off me. "I see no reason why we have to compromise. I see no reason why we can't have both."

And then, well.

It's my wedding night! Well, kinda, almost my wedding night. I'm not go

While everyone was drinking and dancing, the ceremony area was being totally transformed. Phillip knows we're having an after party and helped picked out the great food, but he thinks it's being held here.

At midnight, the DJ stops playing and a

I grabbed Phillip's hand to lead the way.

He stepped into the room and saw the Husker themed sports bar that Amy had suggested. We had pool tables, ping pong tables, dartboard machines, karaoke, and foosball brought in. Drink options are coffee or kegged beer out of red cups. There's white lounge seating with red and black pillows and portable white bleachers. There's even a replica Husker scoreboard that says Bride and Groom instead of Home and Visitor.

Phillip gives me wide half-drunken grin. "You're seriously The. Coolest. Wife. Ever."

We laughed and watched our friends' looks of surprise as they came into the after party. I also notice that Joey, who caught the garter, has his arm tightly wrapped around my sorority little sis and bridesmaid, Chelsea, who is still clutching the bouquet she caught.

Everyone seemed pretty excited.

The pingpong tables were quickly converted to beer pong tables. The groom was bodily carried off to the keg to do a keg stand. Blake, Nick, and Da

I laughed so hard.

By the time we left the after party, Nick was passed out on the white couch, and Katie was making out with Neil behind the bleachers. Some things never change.

Phillip unlocks the door to our honeymoon suite and carries me over the threshold again. The room looks amazing. There are candles lit, rose petals sprinkled across the bed, and two of the rose bouquets from the reception are sitting on the night stand.

Phillip does a silly little dance. "Let's get this wedding night started."

I think he's pretty tipsy.

I wonder if the wedding night is going to go as pla

We slowly undress each other, and then he leads me into the bathroom. In the bathroom are four more of the rose arrangements and more gently flickering candles. A bath has already been drawn and sitting next to the tub is a silver tray with our favorite dessert shots and tea light candles. Attached to it is a note that says, Congrats! Love, the dessert fairy.

You know your wedding was a success when......

You got married.

All the parents show up at your farewell brunch wearing the matching black plastic sunglasses from the hangover kits you handed out.

Most of your groomsmen are still wearing their tuxedos and are still drunk because they have yet to stop partying.

Your sweet sorority sister is doing what appears to be the walk of shame. Granted, Chelsea isn't still wearing last night's dress and clutching her heels and her underwear, but her and Joey both arrive fashionably late at the exact same time. They're gri

The YouTube video of a certain young NFL quarterback doing the stanky leg at your reception already has over 87,000 hits.

I knew we were going somewhere warm, but I had no idea Phillip's parents would splurge like this on our honeymoon. Talk about a gift we'll never forget. We're at a gorgeous luxury resort in the Bahamas, where we have an amazing beach front suite.

I guess he wasn't lying when he said that me in nothing but a bikini all week sounded like his idea of heaven.

We just got back to our room from our quick tour of the resort.

Phillip says, "So, this isn't really a love letter, but it's my lame attempt to tell you all the things I love about you. Remember I told you about the pros and cons list I made? I wrote it the night before I told you I wanted to go out with you for real."

"So I finally get to read it?"

Phillip nods and hands me the paper. "Yeah, providing you promise not to laugh at me."

I read the list. "Phillip, are you serious? You like all the bad things about me. All my flaws. Like how I always think I'm right, how I'm stubborn, how I blurt out stupid things before I think."