Kiss Me

“You have it bad for him, don’t you?”

I look back at Dawson, who is gorgeous, and think, no, I don’t. Why would I want a stupid player boy, who will do nothing but break my heart, when I have sweet Gorgeous sitting here next to me? I’m going to help heal his broken heart, remake his image, and then I’m going to keep him for myself.

I grab the front of his shirt and pull him into a kiss. It’s the first time I have ever initiated a kiss with him.

Then I say, “I think I’m making progress too.”

At halftime, Riley plops down next to us. “Oh. My. Gosh. She’s driving me freaking nuts!”

“Audrey?” both Dawson and I ask.

“Yes. Fine. We hooked up. That doesn’t mean I want to be tied to her for the rest of my life.”

“It’s been three days.” I laugh at Riley’s drama.

“It feels like a lifetime.”

“I sure hope you used a condom, bro, or it might be.” Dawson slaps him on the back.

“Well, that’s one thing you taught me. Thank God!”

“You should be flattered,” I say. “You must have been good, and she wants more of you.”

“Honestly, it was not good. I repulse myself.”

“Dude, it’s about quality, not quantity,” Dawson says.

“Oh, you’re one to talk. What was it you called the beach this summer? Your whoredom?”

“Shut up,” he snarls.

“Like your kingdom, only your whoredom? Oh, that’s cute,” I tease.

“I was brokenhearted, what can I say?”

“Well, I don’t really care about that. Just tell me how to get rid of her! Seriously, she meets me after class, walks me to my next class, shows up at my room and leaves cookies. Dallas won’t eat them. He’s afraid she drugged them or something.”

“My little bro has a stalker, how cute is that?”

Dawson laughs. I don’t.

But then I know that stalking is really not a laughing matter.

“You’re not helping, either one of you,” Riley complains.

I feel bad for him, so I say, “Well you have a few options. Ignore her. Tell her. Find someone else fast.”

“Shit, here she comes. Pretend we’re talking about something important. And ignore her. Do not talk to her!”

She walks up, sits down next him, and, of course, the first thing out of my mouth is, “Hey, Audrey, what’s up?”

Dawson pulls me back between his legs and snickers. Riley groans.

She says, “Hey! How come you guys weren’t at the party Saturday night? It was so much fun. I was a little drunk, but we had fun, didn’t we, Riley?” She hooks her arm through his and smiles at him like they’re an old married couple with a million stories like this. “Although, oh my gosh, I was so hung over on Sunday. It was awful. I threw up at church.”

“We really didn’t need to know that,” Riley growls.

“Oh, sorry. Yeah, well, anyways, how are you doing, Keatyn? I got to talking to Katie. She seems really nice and, oh my gosh, to have made the dance team, that’s super cool.”

She drones on . . . and on . . . and on.

Riley drops his head down into his hands, like he can’t go on any longer.

I look at Dawson, bug my eyes out at him and then at her, thinking this is a time he could actually help his brother. Make them closer.

He squints his eyes, trying to figure out what to do. Finally he says, “Hey, Audrey, shut the fuck up. We’re trying to watch the game.”

She gets a shocked look on her face and looks at Riley like he should stick up for her.

Instead he says, “Look, Audrey, we hooked up, but I really don’t want to hang out with you. We’re not dating. We’re not anything. So why don’t you go sit with your friends?”

Then it’s me who gets the big eyes. I can’t believe he just said that!

Tyrese says, “Damn dude, that was harsh,” as Audrey stomps down the stairs.

Riley shakes his head. “I know. I’m not usually that mean. I just couldn’t take her babbling on anymore!”

Dawson slaps him on the back. “That was legit, bro.”

Riley beams at the compliment.

And I just felt a little bit of brother bonding. I smile at Dawson and snuggle up between his legs. It’s starting to get cold, and this little tank top is not doing it for me.

“You have goosebumps,” he says, ru

“I know, I should have brought a jacket. I’m fine. The game’s almost over.”

“No, hang on. I’ve got a sweatshirt down in my football locker.”

He gets up, jogs down the bleachers, and disappears. A few minutes later, he comes back up with a big Cougar Athletic hoodie and pulls it over my head.

 It’s huge and snuggly.

When the game’s over, we walk to the student center for coffee. I’m sitting here wearing his hoodie with JOHNSON emblazoned across my back when Aiden walks in with a friend.

And just when I thought I was pulling myself out of his force field, he takes one look at me. And it wasn’t a big look. It was more of a sneaky sideways glance that, if I hadn’t been watching very closely, I probably would have missed. And, with that simple glance, his powerful eyes pull me back in like a tractor beam. I just want to scream at him, RELEASE ME! Release me! Let me go!

How can you feel so strongly about a person you have only known such a short amount of time? Especially when during that time you have felt equal amounts of love, hate, and ambivalence.

He gives Dawson a S’up then heads back out the door. He pretty much ignores me. Well, except for the tractor beams.

“I better get back to my dorm,” I tell Dawson. “I have a little homework to do.”

He looks at me with a crooked grin and takes both my hands in his big ones. “Is it weird that I want to thank you?”

“I don’t think I’ve done anything.”

“Yeah, you have. Last semester was miserable for me. This summer, well, you heard how that was, and I was dreading coming back to school and having to be around her, and see her, and have her hate me. But, then, she didn’t hate me anymore, and that was almost worse. And then I met you. I don’t know, but it’s like you’re healing me a little bit every time we’re together.”

“Trust me, you’re not the only one that needs healing. I still don’t know what I’m going to do about B. He’s going to be in New York this weekend. Wants to see me.”

“Shoot. Riley and I were go

“He’s going to be in Long Beach. Is that anywhere close?”

“About an hour south, I think. Do you want to see him?”

“Yeah. I was thinking if I see him it might sorta help.”

“How so?”

“You know, knowing what’s right, how I feel, that sorta stuff.”

“I feel jealous, that’s how I feel. Maybe you don’t have to see him all weekend, or you could go see him, and then come up and party with us?”

“Yeah, that’d be good. If I could leave it open.”

He walks me to my dorm.

When we get there, he grabs the hoodie’s strings and pulls me toward him.

Straight to his lips.

He gives me a sweet kiss and says good night.

I go up to my room. Katie isn’t back yet, so I call Brooklyn.

He answers. “What’s up?”

“Oh, shoot. Did I wake you up? I just realized it’s like way early there.”

“Yeah, it is. But I’m up. I have an early flight back to the states. I didn’t sleep very well. Took a header last night and smashed up my side a bit.”

“You okay? You still coming this weekend?”

“I’ll be fine, and yes, I am.”

“Could you maybe text me some info? Like when you’ll have time to actually hang out with me.”

“Why do you need a schedule? Just show up. Find my tent. We’ll hang.”

“Some friends from school invited me to a party. Well, it’s like a weekend-long party. I was just trying to figure out if I could do both.”

“You can do anything you want, if that’s what you’re asking.”

“Why are you okay with me doing anything I want? Shouldn’t you be a little jealous? Do you not care at all?”