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Deleted Scene from Chapter 7: Bee’s phone call with her mom: This scene takes place when Maddox comes to Masquerade and finds Bee upset. It’s the phone call that happened while he was gone which leads to them making love again.
Looking down at my sketch, I can’t help but smile. It’s good. Damn good. I’m confident in my abilities but it’s not often I think something like that. I don’t even know what it’s for—if I’ll ever use it for anything—but I love it.
I’m still smiling when my phone rings. After tucking the drawing away, I answer with a, “Hello.”
“Leila. Hi. I didn’t expect you to answer.”
Without even meaning to, she just dealt me two blows in one shot. Bee… My name is Bee. Which of course I can’t say because technically it’s not. After all this time, I should be able to be Leila by now. The fact that I can’t feels like a spoon, digging out the happiness I felt while drawing.
And the second blow is knowing that I’m such a crappy daughter she didn’t expect me to answer. Yet, she’s such a good mom that she still calls.
“Sorry.” This is always how it goes with us. I don’t know if she knows it or if I’m crazy for feeling it. When I talk to her, I automatically feel like I’m doing something wrong. “I’ve been busy.”
“How are things going at Masquerade?” she asks.
“Okay, I guess. Could be better but it takes a while to get off the ground.”
Mom sighs. “I know you don’t want to hear this but it would be irresponsible not to talk about it. I know you want this, but just remember Masquerade might not work out. Odds are it won’t. It’s important to have something to fall back on.”
Would it be too much for her to have some faith in me? If it were my sister, she would.
“Why did you help me if you don’t believe in me?”
“That’s not what I meant. I’m sorry if it came off like that.” Mom sighs. “Let’s not do this. I called with good news! Your sister’s boyfriend proposed! I wasn’t surprised when she told me. He’s such a sweet boy. They’ll finish school first, of course. They both know it’s the most important thing.” It’s not fair but all I hear is that that’s why Masquerade will fail. I didn’t do the right thing—the important thing. I never do. You’d think by now I would be used to it but damn, there’s part of me that wishes for once I wasn’t different. That I could have still been the perfect Coral for Rex and Melody and then been the perfect Leila for my real parents too.
Mom keeps going after that. She tells me my sister is on her way to making top of the class and how proud they are of her.
She wants to be a lawyer and I’m a tattoo artist. Only a slight difference there.
The longer she talks, the emptier I feel inside. Then the angrier I get because this is me and I want to be—no, I am—proud of who I am.
The more she talks, the harder it becomes until I can’t stop myself from saying I have to go.
Mom sighs. “Okay, sweetie. It was good talking to you. I hope… I hope you’ll answer the next time I call. The wedding isn’t for a while but there are so many plans to make! I know it’s not your thing but it would mean a lot to have you involved.”
I never said it wasn’t my thing. She’s my sister; of course I’ll help.
Even though I don’t know if she means it like that, it hits me as another way I’ve failed.
I hate the tears that pool in my eyes.
“I will.”
“It’s important.”
“I said I will.”
“I know… I’m sorry. You’re right.”
But I’m not. She’s much better than me for being the type to apologize to smooth things over.
When we get off the phone, Masquerade isn’t the place where I just felt happy. It’s something to hold me over until I discover my real career. It’s not important.
It makes me nauseous to think like that. The place is empty. No clients.
Odds are it will fail.
Hitting the lights, I disappear into my office.
Deleted Scene from Chapter 29: Maddox and Bee reco
Bee’s arms and legs wrap around the back of me as though she physically can’t let go. It’s not tight enough and I have a feeling it isn’t for her either. I need her close, need inside her in every way I can be.
Still, I wait, motorcycle revving beneath us as she looks at the house she’d lived in with people she thought were her parents—people she loved.
I’ll stay as long as it takes for her to say good-bye.
When her hand wanders down and squeezes my leg, I know she’s telling me she’s ready. We take off down the street and even though the ride is freeing, it’s not all we need. Right now I really fucking need her.
The first hotel I come to, I pull my motorcycle in. She doesn’t question anything, just lets go of me and gets off the bike. We need to get back to Virginia; we both know that. It doesn’t make us need tonight any less.
We pull our helmets off and Bee reaches for my hand. I thread my fingers through hers as we head into the office. Less than five minutes later we’re in our room. It’s nicer than the one we had our first night together. I’m grateful for that. She’s not the type of girl to care about shit like that but I still want nice things for her.
Tossing my helmet to the chair, I say, “Come here, baby. I want you and don’t think I can wait.”
She grins and gives me a wink. Holy shit I love this woman.
She gets rid of her helmet, too, before wrapping her arms around my neck. My mouth comes down on her, starving for her taste. Matching my intensity, she kisses me back. I cup her thigh and she lifts her leg, so I pull her up as she wraps herself around me.
“Don’t think I can go slow,” I tell her.
Bee drops her head back so I can kiss her neck. “Don’t think I asked you to.”
That’s all I need and then I’m leaning her down on the bed. Her legs still around me as I lie on top of her. “I need these clothes gone.” I slide her shirt up and she lifts enough for me to pull it off. As I work the clasp on her bra, she’s already unbuttoning her jeans.
I move away just far enough to take my shirt off and then it’s my hands tugging at her pants, pulling them down her legs. They fall out of my hands and I look at her. Let my eyes wander over this girl who is mine. The only woman I’ve ever really wanted.
“You are so beautiful.”
I swear a slight pink colors her cheeks. I like that I can make this tough girl blush.
“I can’t believe you’re making me shy, Scratch.”
“You don’t ever have to be shy with me.” Then I’m taking a condom out of my wallet and getting rid of my pants. Bee moves up in the bed so she’s lying with her head on the pillows.
Her eyes study me as I climb onto the bed. “You’re not so bad yourself.” She pauses and then adds, “You’re beautiful too.”
“Sexy,” I say before I cover her mouth with mine. Our tongues tangle, work together to pleasure each other, and then I’m letting my mouth trail down her neck. I lick that hollow spot at the base of her throat, before I keep going down. Her nipple is right there and I can’t help but taste it.
Bee cries out, arches forward as my mouth teases one breast and then the other. Her nails dig into my back. As much as I want this to last forever, my body burns to be inside her.
“Want you. Now,” I mumble against her.
“Then take me.”
I moan because, Christ, how fucking hot is she?
With my teeth, I rip open the condom wrapper before sliding it down my length. I tease her swollen flesh with my finger, feeling how ready she is for me.