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That’s why Avery and I saw eye to eye. She had the same attitude about guys. Until she met Be

Avery and Ella accepted me for who I was even though I’d never let them get close enough to learn about my past. I’d become the free-spirited girl I’d always dreamed of being, with no worries dragging me down. It had worked until the phone call came from Mom, begging me to move back home this summer. Before that, I had been able to avoid prolonged visits since high school.

But Mom had been there for me, and now I needed to return the favor. I needed to revisit my old ties and responsibilities.

“How do you think your bro’s adjusting to being home?” Shane asked, and my head immediately snapped up at the mention of Dakota’s older brother.

When Dakota convinced me to live with her, she hadn’t told me that Kai had returned from studying abroad in Amsterdam and was crashing at her place this summer. During the past week I’d spent with the two of them, I couldn’t help smirking at the pseudo Dutch accent he’d picked up or secretly drooling over his new physique. I mean damn, he must have bench-pressed some serious windmills or shit over there.

Not that he was my type. I’d always had a thing for jocks. And Kai—with his rotating selection of Vans sneakers and pants that fit his lean thighs like a second skin—was most certainly not a jock.

Still, Kai and Dakota were my oldest friends. I needed to rein in my thoughts. It wouldn’t be the first time I’d admire Kai from a distance and it wouldn’t be the last.

Dakota and Kai were easily two of the most striking people I’d ever laid eyes on. A mix of Dutch from their mother’s side and Native American from their father’s side, they’d been blessed with shiny hair that resembled silky strands of onyx.

They also had the same elusive indigo eyes as their mother, who had sandy-brown hair and fair skin. Next to Mr. Nakos, with his deep brown eyes, hair, and skin, she and her husband made an attractive couple. But the blend of their looks together, in their children, was breathtaking. Mrs. Nakos liked to joke that her children were mutts, but most would agree that the family looked more like well-bred aristocrats ruling the most exquisite, exclusive island.

At least Dakota did. Kai looked more like some flashy rock star, given his piercings and shoulder-length hair.

Kai’s family had owned several successful businesses over the years, including the casino a few miles up the road from where we grew up. A part of me wondered if Kai had returned from Amsterdam to join his father’s ventures, but I instantly batted the idea down. Kai wanted nothing to do with the family business. But Dakota indicated that he’d gotten himself in some trouble and lost his internship with a recording studio. Their mother’s Dutch cousin had all but kicked him out after that.

Kai had always been kind of a loose ca

But he was also a walking contradiction. His true passion was jazz music, though he’d never admit it out loud. He’d lug around his upright bass in a beat-up hard-shell case that looked as if it’d been on tour with a rock band. And maybe it had—at least for that one summer when he’d traveled with a swing band and afterward hooked up with a local celebrity metal group, in which he’d primarily played the keyboard. That boy was mad talented.

“Looks like nothing’s changed, right?” Dakota said.

Kai stood near the bonfire surrounded by a few girls who no doubt wanted his undivided attention, just like old times. He had on a pair of black ski

“That’s my boy,” Shane said, laughing. Being Kai’s best friend had its advantages when it came to the female population, but Shane had always been the more serious one when it came to relationships. He usually had a girlfriend, but his relationships never lasted for too long, and in between, he’d pine over Dakota. Or maybe even during.





When Kai’s eyes latched onto mine from across the yard, I felt that familiar pull toward him. It was as if he and I were parallel in this one singular moment. Both fish out of water, having abandoned our homes—only to return, eager to find our way.

Hoping to make it work.

And damn, as Kai pushed his calloused fingers through the stray pieces of hair that fell from his makeshift elastic tie, I remembered what a beautiful soul he was. He’d always had his looks going for him, sure. But tonight, with the glow of the embers slanting across his bronzed cheekbones, he seemed even more gorgeous. And there was something in his stance—the way he toed the dirt, fists clenched at his sides that made him seem vulnerable. Exposed. More open than I’d ever witnessed before.

The vision of him knocked the breath straight from out of my lungs.

But then he ruined that perfect image by taking a long drag of the joint in his hand. I hated when he smoked. Still, I couldn’t help but notice how his full lips curved over the top of the blunt.

What in the hell was wrong with me?

I’d grown up with Kai and was practically a member of his family. And he knew nearly everything about me—up until three years ago.

Dakota said he’d been smoking way too much weed, and it had nothing to do with it being legal in Amsterdam. I knew the only thing Kai ever wanted to do with his life was play music in some way, shape, or form. So when he decided to study music theory in Amsterdam, I was actually impressed. Until I found out that he’d been hanging with a new crowd, was close to doing something bordering on illegal, and Mr. Nakos had encouraged him to get the hell out of the country.

I shook my head—Kai was always in some kind of trouble.

Some dude pulled in way too fast on a red Yamaha motorcycle. “Don’t crash, you idiot,” Mile’s old teammate yelled as the bike skidded in the grass. Too many eyes darted in my direction, and there was nervous tittering from some of the girls. Nope, being home was not awkward in the least bit.

“I’m getting another drink,” I said, jumping down from the truck. “Want anything?”

“No, I’m good,” Dakota said. She and Shane had gotten involved in a conversation with some former classmates who’d just arrived at the party.

I headed toward the cooler for another beer. As I passed by the bonfire, I heard Kai’s low and smooth voice telling his admirers how the red-light district wasn’t as it appeared in movies.

“Let’s drill Rachel about what the big city’s been like.” I felt strong fingers grip my hand, and then I was yanked into the hard wall of Kai’s chest.

“Sound good, Turtle?” he whispered, and I playfully elbowed him in the ribs. It’d been his nickname for me since middle school cross-country. I was one of the slowest on the team in my forest-green uniform, and he’d gotten a kick out of his joke. When I’d tell him where to stick it, he’d only change it to a turtle name like Shelly or Myrtle just to piss me off.

Kai’s arm immediately curled around my neck in a kind of headlock, like the three years had never passed between us. He’d made this same obnoxious move countless times in high school and I’d clamber to get away from him, because it always made me feel like a kid in front of his metal-head friends. And, more important, in front of him.