Before You Break

I whimpered and moaned as his tongue tu

Light and heat danced around the corners of my mind, while the world caved in around me. He stilled his lips and clung onto my thighs with I throbbed and panted and quivered.

As I floated back down he licked me tenderly before finally releasing his hold on me.

I collapsed onto the bed and then curled onto my side into a tight ball, mumbling incoherently, still throbbing in pleasure. He reached for my chin and stared into my eyes.

Stroking my slick hair away from my face, he shattered the silence by uttering his first words, in a shaky, almost desperate voice, “Ella . . .”

“Please, Qui

He bent over and picked his shorts off the floor, pulling a condom from his wallet. He slid it over his very stiff erection, trembling with need. I turned and raised my hips with eagerness, but still he took his time. He bent down and kissed me, forcing his tongue so deep into my mouth that I gasped for air.

His eyes were fixed on mine as he pushed his tip in tentatively. The feeling was so intense, so personal that I struggled to keep my tears at bay. Qui

When he opened them again he gazed at me in wonder.

“You feel amazing,” he murmured. “Christ, so incredible.”

He rocked into me, going deeper before pulling almost all the way back out. He repeated the motion, finding a rhythm that had me writhing with pleasure.

Having him fill me so completely was incredible. Gratifying. Profound.

I had fallen so hard for this boy. And I saw the same reflected in his eyes.

He cradled my head in his hands in an almost-protective gesture right before he plunged inside me again. I brought my legs higher around his waist and his thrusts became harder and deeper. His groans filled the room as he drove into me again and again.

He leaned down and pulled my breast into mouth, sucking it eagerly. His tongue swirled around my nipple before biting down. That was my tipping point as he sent me skyward again.

The feeling was beyond words. Beyond colors and lights. It was the sky. The universe.

A pure and exquisite slice of heaven.

“Fuck, Ella.” He became still, watching me. Waiting. Marveling.

And then he drove himself fully inside of me, deep and solid.

As solid as my bones. As liquid as my veins.

To the very depths of my core. And maybe even my soul.

His release came in a breathy and curse-laden chorus.

He collapsed on top of me and kissed my neck and ear and jaw all while whispering unintelligible words. Tangled together in a sheen of sweat—we lay panting and recovering.

“You’re so beautiful, Ella,” he said, before gathering me in his arms and kissing me tenderly. “I’ve never had this. . . .” The words escaped him, his throat clogging with emotion.

As the first tear spilled from my eye, I said, “Me neither.”

His thumb came up and swiped my cheek. Then he pulled me tightly again him, my back to his front. Our breaths were soft and steady against the stillness of the night.

“I guess this means you’re all mine,” he breathed against my ear.

“For as long as you’ll have me,” I mumbled, in the haze of sleep.

And just as we drifted off into the land of bliss, I heard him whisper, “Forever works for me.”

ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS

First, I want to say how grateful I am for my ten plus years as a clinical social worker, where my experience in child and family therapy taught me a great deal about humanity. I learned about empathy, vulnerability, and the resilience of the human spirit. The thing we all share regardless of our race, gender, or socio-economic status is the need to be loved and to belong. Kindness goes a long way in helping someone keep their dignity. It might actually be a lifeline.

Thank you to Jane G. for assisting me with hotline details. You are truly one of the most gifted and compassionate people in my former field. And in life.

Thanks to Greg P. for teaching me the ins and out of college baseball.

To my rock star agent, Sara Megibow. You are like the voice of reason inside my head.

To the entire Penguin team, including the art department for my amazing covers, and the savvy publicity team: Erin Galloway and Nina Bocci. To the editing department: Laura Fazio, your keen eye helped make this book so much stronger. I’m so glad to have you in my corner. Special shout-out to Jesse Feldman who helped shape this story from the begi

To my family and friends for your constant unwavering support: I love you.

To my first readers: Kate, Stina, Lindsay, Deb, and Alina. Thank you for believing in Qui

To the book bloggers and reviewers out there—there are too many of you to list here. Please just know I appreciate all that you do for the simple love of books. Because when it comes down to it, all of us are first and foremost, readers.

A special shout-out to The Sub Club ladies for making my debut book tour rock.

An additional thanks to Neda, Angelica, and Christine for those extra things you did to make my debut launch more special.

Last, to the readers. Thank you for taking a chance on my books and reaching out to talk to me about them. For an author, there may be no better feeling.