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“And leave you?”
“The time comes, Li
“And you wanted me to marry Fe
“Not only that, Li
“So might we have been but for that night.”
“Your father must not know. I fear that man. I feared him when he strode into the i
“You can always say that of life, Mother. It is always a matter of taking the wrong or the right road.”
“Now we must be sure to take the right one. I’m glad you have told me, Li
“What will my father say?”
“We shall have to be very careful with him. He is expecting an a
“I couldn’t, Mother, not with the child.”
“You would grow used to the idea. Perhaps it would be best.”
“Please do not tell him.”
“We will not act rashly although we must not delay too long. This has been a terrible shock and I need time to think. Dearest Li
“I am so relieved that you know,” I said. “It seems so much easier to bear now.”
“We will find a way out, darling,” she said. “Together we will find the way.”
The way was found for us. A few days after I had told my mother, Colum Casvellyn came to visit us. I was in my bedchamber sewing a button on one of my gowns when Je
“He’s here,” she said. “He’s come to call.”
“Who?” I asked.
“The one who rescued you and brought you back.”
I felt my knees tremble.
“This can’t be so.”
“Oh yes, ’tis so, Mistress. He rode into the courtyard like as though he were master here and he leaped down and shouted to one of the grooms who stood gaping at him. Then he saw me and he said: ‘Go tell your mistress, your young mistress, she has a visitor.’”
“You are sure it is this man?”
Je
“Oh yes, Mistress, there be no mistaking him.”
I said: “Bring him into the winter parlour. I will join him there.”
She was off with all speed. I thought: I should find my mother. It would be better if we saw him together. But no, I wanted to see him alone first. I wanted to test my feelings for him.
I could scarcely wait to reach the winter parlour. He was already there, standing with his back to the window, legs apart in that arrogant ma
“Good day to you,” he cried, smiling broadly. He strode towards me and taking both my hands drew me towards him and kissed me on the mouth.
I flushed hotly and drew back in dismay.
“Coy?” he said. “Reluctant? Oh no, not after all we have been to each other.”
My heart was beating so fast that I could not find my voice. I was filled with uncertainty. I had never felt this overpowering emotion before. It was a hatred, I supposed; but I was not entirely sure.
He looked at me intently. “I came to see how matters stood,” he said.
“I do not understand you, sir.”
“After such pleasure as we shared there could be results. I was anxious for your health.”
“How could you know …” I cried.
His eyebrows were raised; his eyes lighted suddenly with pleasure.
“’Tis so,” he cried. “’Tis so indeed.”
He tried to take me by the shoulders but I stepped back sharply. “By God,” he cried. “I knew it. You were meant to bear sons, I’ll swear. I sensed it that night at the i
I stood back still farther. I wished that I had called my mother to come with me.
“You are sure?” he asked.
“I have told my mother.”
His eyebrows were raised again. They were thick, bushy and very arched.
“What says she?”
“You must be gone,” I said. “I never want to see you again.”
“Not see the father of your child?”
“It must be forgotten. I am going away. We have pla
“Going away? Where will you go?”
“I am not prepared to tell you.”
“Going away … carrying my child!”
I cried out in despair. “Leave me alone, I beg of you. Have you not harmed me enough? Never let me see you again.”
“I came here,” he said, “to offer you marriage.”
“That is noble of you,” I said with sarcasm.
“I am a man to honour my obligations.”
“This one may pass. You could best make amends by going away and never coming into my life again.”
“And the child?”
“Will be taken care of. It shall never know that it was forced on an i
“I am going to look after you and the child. We will marry without delay. Our son will be born a little prematurely for respectability mayhap but that is not a matter to cause us over much concern.”
“How could I marry you?”
“Simply. I could get a priest today. The sooner the better for the sake of our child.”
There was a scratching at the door and Je
I said: “Pray tell my mother that Squire Colum Casvellyn is here, Je
He looked at me slyly as though he knew it was a cry for help.
When Je
“I do not wish to remain here alone with you.”
“We were alone, remember, all through that memorable night.”
“How dare you speak in that way. As though … I were a party to it.”
“But you were a party to it. You made no attempt to run away.”
“How could I?”
“’Twould not have been easy, I’ll grant you. But you were not in truth averse. I awakened something in you. Something you will never forget. That is why you will be wise to accept my offer, give our child a name and give me many more children. I need a wife. I want sons. I know you will be the one to provide them.”
My mother came in.
She stood on the threshold and her eyes flashed in rage.
“How dare you come here!” she demanded.
He bowed ironically. “Madam,” he said, “I came to ask for your daughter’s health and to offer her my heart and hand along with the marriage bond.”
“Marriage!” she cried.
“’Tis only seemly, since as you know we have already bedded and with results.”