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“Actually, can I just say something?”
“For fuck’s sake,” Ashley sighs from across the table. “Will someone just say something?”
“Thanks for tonight,” Cam starts. “Le
There’re whoops and cheers, handshakes and cuddles. Len gets the champers out of the fridge that we brought with us and we all have a glass, Jim, Ash and Sam, all only having a tiny amount, I notice.
“So what’s your news, Jim?” I look across at my best friend and ask. She leans around Le
“After our little conversation at your mum’s the other night, Ash and I went to see Doctor Shepherd today.” My mouth is instantly dry. Doctor Shepherd is my fertility doctor, my baby maker. Why’ve they been to see him?
“We just wanted to be absolutely clear on what would be required of us, and because this is going to affect us and our families, the boys came with us too.” My head starts to spin. I’m holding one of Cam’s hands with both of mine, gripping it is probably closer to the correct term. They’ve changed their minds. I already know what they’re going to tell me. They’ve had time to think and they’ve changed their minds.
“What we’ve decided, George, and I know you’re not go
It’s been such a good week, a week where I’ve began to feel like me, like Georgia again. I’ve allowed myself to live, to love, to hope and dream, to feel, and that will be my downfall, allowing myself to feel. I shouldn’t have let that happen. I shouldn’t have allowed that, because now as it all gets pulled away from under me again. I just know the pain will crush me.
“Georgia,” I look up as Marley says my name, “breathe, G, breathe.” He shakes his head crossly. “See, this is exactly the reason we’re go
Someone places a glass of water in my hand and I take a sip. Cam kneels down in front of my chair and looks up at me with worried eyes.
“You okay, Kitten?” I nod. I’m not okay. I’m shaking and I feel clammy.
I look around at seven worried faces. Sam’s crying and gripping Bailey’s hand; the pair of them have hardly said a word all evening.
“Did you listen to all of that? Did you take any of what I said in?”
I shake my head at Jimmie. Ash starts to talk. “George, this is how it’s go
“You still wa
Jimmie shakes her head and laughs. “No, George, of course we’re not saying no. Whenever you’re ready to go, so are we. Obviously, you two still have a lot to sort out. I mean, you’ve been together a week, right?” I nod as I reach for the glass of water I drank from a few moments ago.
I look up at Cam, who’s now sitting back in his chair next to me, then around at my brothers. “Are we mad d’ya think? We bought a house today. We’ve been together a week and tonight we’re discussing IVF, surrogacy and having children. We haven’t even discussed where we’re spending Christmas and yet we’re here with all of you discussing this.” I turn and look at Cam. “I don’t even know if you like turkey.” My thoughts are suddenly tumbling out of my mouth without any kind of filtration happening.
“See, George, you’re doing it again. Chill the fuck out will ya, babe,” Marley says.
Marley, my poor brother Marley. None of this can be easy for him.
“Are you sure you’re okay with this? Please be honest with me, Marls.” Marley knocks back his glass of bourbon before answering me.
“To be perfectly honest, it’s breaking my heart, George.” He turns his eyes to Cam. “No disrespect to you, mate, but this is so fucking hard. Everything they went through to be together, the way they loved each other, he didn’t deserve that; she didn’t deserve that, no one deserves that.” I can see his lips start to tremble as he talks. His eyes are filled with tears as he shrugs. “I won’t lie and say that I don’t wish it was them we were doing this for. He was as much a brother to me as these two and I miss him every day, every minute of every day, but he’s gone and nothings go
Marley wipes his nose on his napkin. “Sorry, Jim, I’ve made your napkin all snotty.”
She leans across from where she’s sitting, wraps her arms around his neck and kisses his cheek. “After that epic speech, I think I can let you off.”
“I love you, big brother Marley,” I tell him.
“Why do you say that? What is it with the big brother thing?” Ash asks. This is Bailey’s story to tell, being the eldest, he’s the only one who can remember how it started. He’s sitting next to me.
“You tell her, Bails.” He smiles at me, but it doesn’t reach his eyes. Both he and Sam look pale. “When Georgia was little she thought we were all called big brother for some reason, we don’t know how it started but she just called the three of us big brother, so then my mum and dad tried to get her to say our names by saying big brother Bailey, Le
“I’m pregnant,” Sam blurts out. We all turn and look in her direction.